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Stop Hurting the Woman You Love: Breaking the Cycle of Abusive Behavior Paperback – February 9, 2006

by Charlie Donaldson M.A. (Author), Randy Flood (Author), Elaine Eldridge Ph.D. (Contributor)
4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 314 ratings
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A first-ever how-to book to help abusive men change their behavior by changing their thinking.

End the cycle of abuse - for good. Authors Charlie Donaldson, Randy Flood and Elaine Eldridge uncover a proven action plan that violent men can use to change their behavior. Filled with insightful questionnaires and actual case histories, the essential how-to book Stop Hurting the Woman You Love, will help end abusive patterns in favor of healthier, happier relationships.
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  1. Print length
    224 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Hazelden Publishing
  4. Publication date
    February 9, 2006
  5. Dimensions
    5.4 x 0.8 x 8.4 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    1592853544
  7. ISBN-13
    978-1592853540
  8. See all details
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Page 1 of 1 Start overPage 1 of 1
Previous page
  1. How to Stop Being Toxic: Quit Manipulative Behaviors, Avoid Hurting the People You Love, and Start Healthy Relationships
  2. How to Stop Being a Narcissist: Real and Proven Strategies to Change Narcissistic / Manipulative Behavior and Stop Sabotaging
  3. The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Expanded Third Edition: How to recognize it and how to respond
  4. How To Stop Being A Narcissist: Complete Guide On How To Give Up Control In Relationships How To Recognize And Stop Controlli
  5. Don't Be A Dick: Change Yourself, Change Your World
  6. Breaking the Mirror—Overcoming Narcissism: How to Conquer Self-Centeredness and Achieve Successful Relationships
Next page

Editorial Reviews

About the Author

Charlie Donaldson is director of the Men's Resource Center in Holland, Michigan. He has specialized in working with men for twelve years and offers batterer intervention, substance abuse counseling, and men's therapy groups. As an adjunct professor in the School of Social Work at Grand Valley State University in Allendale, Michigan. Donaldson specializing in working with male interns focusing on men's issues. He has presented seminars for other therapists on the psychology of men who abuse women, obstacles and approaches to working with men in therapy, risk and lethality issues for batterers, and interventions for angry and assaultive men. Charlie was instrumental in creating the Batterer Intervention Service Coalition of Michigan and the Lakeshore Alliance Against Domestic and Sexual Violence of Ottawa County, Michigan. He is credentialed as a Limited Licensed Psychologist, a Licensed Professional Counselor, a Certified Addictions Counselor I and holds M.A. degrees in English and in Counseling Psychology.

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Hazelden Publishing; Illustrated edition (February 9, 2006)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Paperback ‏ : ‎ 224 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1592853544
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1592853540
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 10.9 ounces
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 5.4 x 0.8 x 8.4 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.6 4.6 out of 5 stars 314 ratings

About the authors

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  1. Randy Flood

    Randy Flood

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    Randy Flood, MA LLP is a therapist with the Fountain Hill Center, co-founder and director of the Men’s Resource Center and the Center for the Prevention and Treatment of Mascupathy. Flood has spent the last twenty years creating and developing specialized clinical services for men. Often called upon as an expert witness for district and circuit courts, Flood provides trainings on problems such as bullying, domestic violence, sexual addiction, and men in counseling. He also serves as a therapist and expert relating to parenting time and custody issues.

    Flood’s first book, Stop Hurting the Woman You Love: Breaking the Cycle of Abusive Behavior, (Hazelden, 2006), co-authored with Charlie Donaldson, is widely considered one of the leading anger management books for men. He writes for several online and print publications and is a contributing writer to the Michigan Bar Journal and Voice Male magazine. Flood has consulted with national media such as the Christian Science Monitor and Minneapolis Sun Times on issues ranging from domestic violence to mass shootings. His expertise has also been featured on radio, television, podcasts, and in regional and state publications.

    See more on the author's page
  2. Charlie Donaldson

    Charlie Donaldson

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    Full content visible, double tap to read brief content.

    Charlie Donaldson, LLP, LPC, holds more than 25 years of clinical practice with a focus on men and masculinity. He is the founder and director of the Men's Counseling Center of Northern Michigan and co-founder and director of the Institute for the Prevention & Treatment of Mascupathy (IPTM). He was previously Director of the Men’s Resource Center in Holland, Michigan, which he established in 1997 as an agency focused on men and men’s issues. Donaldson worked as an instructor at Grand Valley State University, Allendale, Michigan, and frequently served as a presenter at workshops for therapists, court staff, and health professionals on batterer intervention and other treatment modalities for men.

    In addition to co-authoring Mascupathy (2014) and Stop Hurting the Woman You Love: Breaking the Cycle of Abusive Behavior (Hazelden, 2006) with Randy Flood, Donaldson is the author of Restorative Treatment: A New Specialty in Counseling (2009), and the Smart and Effective series of manuals for treatment of substance abuse, domestic violence, and other men’s issues. He is often asked to provide tools and guidance for psychologists, counselors, social workers and other mental health professionals.

    See more on the author's page
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Customer reviews

4.6 out of 5 stars
4.6 out of 5
314 global ratings

Top reviews from the United States

FrequentTraveler
5.0 out of 5 stars Eye Opening
Reviewed in the United States on April 24, 2024
Verified Purchase
This book has been extremely eye opening. It has changed how I view tough conversations and how best to approach them. I believe this book should be a must read for any man in a relationship.
One person found this helpful
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ladybug
5.0 out of 5 stars Did Not Buy This Book for Me
Reviewed in the United States on March 24, 2013
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I know someone that is very abusive and is actually in prison right now because of abuse on his girlfriend with his baby in her arms. He was on drugs at the time. I have been writing him on how he can improve himself, so when he gets out if wants to become a better man, he can. I read what the chapters have in the book. It is awesome. It goes from his own childhood into why he abuses as an adult. I can hardly wait to hear back from him to see how he likes the book. He just received it yesterday and I do not know how long it takes to go through the process, but he will have it shortly. The good news is he has an opened mind and wants to come out a better man. He is also getting his GED while in there. I say hooray for him.
16 people found this helpful
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Mike D.
5.0 out of 5 stars A powerful read
Reviewed in the United States on March 9, 2022
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I got divorced and a large part of it was that my wife could not be around me. Her mental state was shattered. I knew I had an anger problem. So I read into some of her letters and there was emotional abuse. I bought this book, and there is a lot of information in there about the types of abuse I put her through. It also help me know what kind of person I became when I got angry. This book helped me understand my abusive behavior, which I'm getting help with.
27 people found this helpful
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Amazon Customer
4.0 out of 5 stars Good book in combination with behavioral therapy
Reviewed in the United States on September 2, 2016
Verified Purchase
I feel as though the book is excellent at explaining how a man can identify feelings and feel more in tune with himself. I feel more intelligent when i speak to my wife about emotions and how to properly communicate what im feeling to her. Its stressful learning, but thats where getting a behavioral therapist will help most, because this book is not meant to be used alone. Guidance from a therapist while learning how to deal with your emotions and communicating them to your spouse is the best way to stay in check with yourself when youre trying to develop new behavioral habits.
11 people found this helpful
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Tonia
5.0 out of 5 stars Good information
Reviewed in the United States on July 2, 2023
Verified Purchase
I ordered this for my ex and he said it was good. He's currently incarcerated and has borrowed it to other guys that have asked and they have appreciated what it's had to say.
4 people found this helpful
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Jeremy C.
5.0 out of 5 stars Every married man should read this book.
Reviewed in the United States on January 7, 2023
Verified Purchase
I wish I had read this sooner. I truly believe it could have helped me stop hurting the woman I love before the hurt was too much for her to want to stay with me.
13 people found this helpful
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Walter
5.0 out of 5 stars Very, very informative.
Reviewed in the United States on July 5, 2018
Verified Purchase
Great introduction to understanding your anger and why men do the things that we do. After each and every "blow up" of anger, I feel horrible guilt and sorrow. This book have me a great starting place and I am going to follow many of it's reommendations. It is well worth the money and time and energy spent to read this book especially if you love the woman that you continuously hurt, emotionally and or phsyically. Hope this helps.
27 people found this helpful
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Recent Customer
5.0 out of 5 stars Good.Book
Reviewed in the United States on June 29, 2022
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Sending it to someone in jail. He has plenty of time to read it.
14 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

Cris
5.0 out of 5 stars Learn how to better yourself.
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on September 4, 2020
Verified Purchase
This book is a necessity to every man AND woman who deny their emotions or even just punch the wall when angry. Read it, it is you. This book will help you to evaluate yourself, your life and your relationships for the better.
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Hilary
5.0 out of 5 stars Help For Abusive Men
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on December 20, 2019
Verified Purchase
In my opinion as a psychotherapist of 20 years, this is the best book ever written by men, to help men. Those who’re open to confronting their emotionally and/or physically violet behaviour to the woman in their life.
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billy hancock
5.0 out of 5 stars excellent
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on January 20, 2014
Verified Purchase
everyman needs to read this book its worth its money in gold. excellent put me back on track & set out in laymans terms
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Minniexx
5.0 out of 5 stars Eye opener
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on June 25, 2016
Verified Purchase
If anyone is unhappy in their relationship, read this book.
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Zorba
5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on November 17, 2014
Verified Purchase
Great book, everyone should read it!
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