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19 Best Books on Emotional Intelligence

Published: May 15, 2023
Published: 05/15/2023
Headshot of Melissa Boudin, PsyD
Written by:

Melissa Boudin

PsyD
Headshot of Trishanna Sookdeo, MD, MPH, FAAFP
Reviewed by:

Trishanna Sookdeo

MD, MPH, FAAFP
  • General Guides to Emotional IntelligenceGeneral Guides
  • Emotional Intelligence in Business & LeadershipBusiness & Leadership
  • Emotional Intelligence in RelationshipsRelationships
  • How Therapy Can Help You Develop Emotional IntelligenceHow Therapy Can Help
  • Additional ResourcesResources
Headshot of Melissa Boudin, PsyD
Written by:

Melissa Boudin

PsyD
Headshot of Trishanna Sookdeo, MD, MPH, FAAFP
Reviewed by:

Trishanna Sookdeo

MD, MPH, FAAFP

Individuals, organizations, teams, and people in relationships have long turned to guides and how-tos on improving emotional intelligence as a means of feeling more fulfilled, becoming better leaders, improving relationships, and more. Below, you’ll find 19 of the best books on emotional intelligence that can provide you with actionable steps and strategies for boosting your own EQ.

For our audience’s convenience, we include links to Amazon so recommended books can be easily purchased. Choosing Therapy may earn a commission from Amazon when purchases are made using the links on this page. Read more about our high editorial standards and advertising policy.

General Guides to Emotional Intelligence

The following list of books includes general guides on emotional intelligence. You’ll learn about the basic principles of EQ, how improving it can help you in your day-to-day life, how to understand your emotions and triggers, and how to implement specific action plans.

Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ by Daniel Goleman

1. Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ

Daniel Goleman draws on substantial research into neuroscience and behavioral psychology to give his readers insight into what he calls the “two minds”—the rational and emotional parts of our brain—and how they work together to determine our reality. He delves into why a high IQ sometimes isn’t the only or most relevant factor that goes into success and that, in fact, emotional intelligence (EQ) has a much larger hand in the matter. Although EQ is shaped in childhood, Goleman believes it can be nurtured into adulthood, providing immediate physical and emotional benefits.

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

2. Emotional Intelligence 2.0

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 is probably one of the most well-known books on emotional intelligence. It states that understanding EQ and knowing how to implement it wisely in your own life are two very different things. As such, authors Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves offer up a step-by-step guide to accessing your EQ and increasing it. Newsweek calls it a “fast read with compelling anecdotes and good context.” By the end of the book, you’ll have a better grasp of EQ in relation to self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management.

Emotional Intelligence: A 21-Day Step by Step Guide to Mastering Social Skills, Improve Your Relationships, and Boost Your EQ by David Clark

3. Emotional Intelligence: A 21-Day Step by Step Guide to Mastering Social Skills, Improve Your Relationships, and Boost Your EQ

Author David Clark believes that emotional intelligence is one of the most coveted aspects of personal and professional success. He references studies that show how it’s a much better indicator of success and fulfillment than intelligence or IQ. In this 21-day guide, Clark also covers topics including emotional management, conflict resolution, mastering complex social situations, self-awareness, and more. Master your emotions with Emotional Intelligence!

Go Suck a Lemon: Strategies for Improving Your Emotional Intelligence by Michael Cornwall, PsyD, PhD

4. Go Suck a Lemon: Strategies for Improving Your Emotional Intelligence

Go Suck a Lemon gives its readers methods of improving their emotional intelligence based on cognitive skill-building techniques. It aims to make the human experience less self-defeating and more enriching. Author Michael Cornwall, PhD, is an author, lecturer, clinical supervisor, educator, and therapist specializing in emotional intelligence. He takes logical ideas and makes them feel like common sense, entertaining and educating his readers at the same time.

Emotional Advantage5. Emotional Advantage: Embracing All Your Feelings to Create a Life You Love

Emotional Advantage asks the question, “What do we do when life doesn’t go according to plan?” In response, it uses neuroscience to provide a guide and a source of emotional support for readers. It gives perspective on how fear can be a motivator, guilt can be clarifying, and anger can lead us to make better boundaries. Award-winning author Randy Taran explains how every emotion, even the most difficult ones, can help bring us to a place of authenticity and peace.

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Emotional Intelligence in Business & Leadership

Emotional intelligence is a sought-after commodity in the business world, especially for someone in a position of power. If you take a deep dive into the titles below, you’ll be able to lead more efficiently, empathetically, and effectively.

Primal Leadership: Unleashing the Power of Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis, and Annie McKee

6. Primal Leadership: Unleashing the Power of Emotional Intelligence

For managers, CEOs, coaches, and all variety of leaders, Primal Leadership affirms the influence of emotional intelligence in the professional world. A trio of best-selling authors—Daniel Goleman, Richard Boyatzis, and Annie McKee—illustrates the power and necessity of leadership that exemplifies self-awareness, empathy, motivation, and collaboration. Readers call it a “timely resource for those aspiring to lead.” USA Today calls it an “invigorating” read.

Working With Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

7. Working With Emotional Intelligence

As a follow-up to his first book on emotional intelligence, Daniel Goleman’s Working with Emotional Intelligence focuses on the benefits of having a high EQ in business. He covers five sets of skills and how they determine who thrives in some of the top corporations worldwide. Additionally, Goleman offers guidelines to training individuals and teams in an emotionally intelligent organization. Readers call it “the most important business book you’ll ever read.”

Emotional Intelligence for Sales Success: Connect With Customers and Get Results by Colleen Stanley

8. Emotional Intelligence for Sales Success: Connect With Customers and Get Results

If you’re in sales, this book was designed with you in mind. Author and sales trainer Colleen Stanley cites case studies and offers tips on how to expand your emotional toolkit and overcome difficult selling encounters. Emotional Intelligence for Sales Success is all about building impulse control, becoming a better listener, and asking the right questions. Stanley believes that doing so can make you more likeable, trustworthy, effective, and empathetic. She describes specific skills that have helped some of the best sales producers in history to drive results and close the deal.

HBR Guide to Emotional Intelligence

9. HBR Guide to Emotional Intelligence

This book from the Harvard Business Review uses research by prolific author Daniel Goleman to explore the ways that emotional intelligence is a better determinant of solid leadership than any other trait. It provides the reader with advice to succeed at work, become a better leader, address business challenges, deal with difficult people, and bounce back from tough times. Fortunately, this guide operates based on the belief that emotional intelligence is not innate. Rather, it is something to be nurtured until it thrives.

Leadership: The Power of Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

10. Leadership: The Power of Emotional Intelligence

Daniel Goleman, ranked one of the top ten business intellectuals by Accenture Institute for Strategic Change, is back at it with Leadership: The Power of Emotional Intelligence. This time, he’s delving into emotional intelligence in relation to leadership. Of his book, he says, “I’ve pulled together more than two decades’ worth of my writings that best illustrate EI’s positive impact on personal and organizational excellence.” Readers will discover how to manage “with the heart,” get results, access the social brain, and hit the sweet spot for achievement.

Becoming a Resonant Leader: Develop Your Emotional Intelligence, Renew Your Relationships, Sustain Your Effectiveness  by Annie McKee, Richard Boyatzis, and Frances Johnston

11. Becoming a Resonant Leader: Develop Your Emotional Intelligence, Renew Your Relationships, Sustain Your Effectiveness 

Another trio of authors—Annie McKee, Richard Boyatzis, and Frances Johnston—shares real-life stories and experiences that illustrate how people can develop and strengthen emotional intelligence over time. Reflecting on personal research and practical wisdom, Becoming a Resonant Leader helps its readers articulate strengths and values, and create a plan to intentional change. It’s an ideal guide for teachers, coaches, consultants, and managers.

The Emotionally Intelligent Manager: How to Develop and Use the Four Key Emotional Skills of Leadership by David R. Caruso and Peter Salovey

12. The Emotionally Intelligent Manager: How to Develop and Use the Four Key Emotional Skills of Leadership

Authors David R. Caruso and Peter Salovey don’t believe in the long-taught notion that expressing emotions at work is bad. On the contrary, they argue that emotions are integral to how we think, reason, and make decisions. In The Emotionally Intelligent Manager, readers learn about the four-part hierarchy of emotional skills: identification, facilitation, understanding, and management. It goes on to show ways of measuring emotional intelligence, learning new skills, and employing them to work-related issues.

The EQ Difference: A Powerful Plan for Putting Emotional Intelligence to Work by Adele B. Lynn

13. The EQ Difference: A Powerful Plan for Putting Emotional Intelligence to Work

The EQ Difference aims to help you help your organization to be more productive, boost morale, and retain good employees. In this guide by Adele B Lynn, co-written by the Society for Human Resource Management, you’ll have access to self-assessment tools, team-focused exercises, practical tips and suggestions, and workplace examples. Readers call it a “delicious mixture of pragmatism and passion,” and say it should be mandatory reading for every company.

Emotional Agility14. Emotional Agility: Get Unstuck, Embrace Change, and Thrive in Work and Life

The Harvard Business Review calls Emotional Agility “counterintuitive” and “groundbreaking.” Author and renowned psychologist Susan David, PhD, says the path to professional fulfillment is winding and filled with detours, but one of the only things we need to navigate is emotional agility. According to David, this revolutionary approach teaches people self-acceptance, open mindedness, and open heartedness. Through her research and years of consulting, she found that the way people respond to internal experiences determines their outer experiences and success.

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Emotional Intelligence in Relationships

The following three books on emotional intelligence were crafted with relationships in mind. They’re perfect guides for anyone who needs to retrain their brain for better communication, more emotional acceptance, and a deeper personal connection.

Emotional Intelligence for Couples: Simple Ways to Increase the Communication in Your Relationship by John Lee

15. Emotional Intelligence for Couples: Simple Ways to Increase the Communication in Your Relationship

Healthy relationships rely on mutual emotional intelligence and communication. In Emotional Intelligence for Couples, relationship expert John Lee explains the basic principles of EQ, equipping his readers with strategies to express emotions, communicate clearly, and reach a state of deeper connection. He covers how to have a healthy argument, prevent criticism and manipulation, set personal boundaries, and change behavior to improve the relationship.

At the Heart of Leadership: How to Get Results With Emotional Intelligence by Joshua Freedman

16. At the Heart of Leadership: How to Get Results With Emotional Intelligence

If you’re looking to take your leadership skills to the next level, this book will show you how. Instead of just talking about emotional intelligence, At the Heart of Leadership provides a roadmap to using it. Author Joshua Freedman writes from experience, referencing his work with the US Marine Corps, Schlumberger, and FedEx. He shares the Six Second EQ Model, which functions as a three-step process to effectively handling difficult emotions.

The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationships by Jeanne Segal, Ph.D.

17. The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationships

Author Jeanne Segal, PhD, teaches that you can increase your emotional intelligence in the context of your relationships with five tools. Readers call it “practical” and “ready-to-use,” citing it as playing a crucial role in the health of their relationship. Dr. Segal’s step-by-step program covers how to “read” people, make deeper connections, defuse arguments, heal emotional wounds, and understand body language. You’ll enjoy actionable exercises, self-quizzes, relaxation or calming techniques, and an overall hands-on approach. Segal says that once you master the language of emotional intelligence, you’ll be better equipped to communicate authentically with others.

How to Be an Adult in Relationships18. How to Be an Adult in Relationships: The Five Keys to Mindful Loving

This book by David Richo is beloved by many. Its core message is about how to be more mindful and intentional in our relationships, understanding that love isn’t so much a feeling as it is a way of being present. How to Be an Adult in Relationships includes useful information on communication styles, online dating, and how to end a relationship if the need arises. Richo also shares what he calls the “five A’s,” which are:

  • Attention
  • Acceptance
  • Appreciation
  • Affection
  • Allowing

Other topics include how to create boundaries, overcome fear of abandonment, and express anger in healthy and loving ways.

Radical Intimacy19. Radical Intimacy: Cultivate the Deeply Connected Relationships You Desire and Deserve

Radical Intimacy is a narrative guide and methodology for how to sustain our relationships with others, ourselves, and the world at large. Author Zoë Kors says, “With intimacy as a foundational principle of our existence, we can build a life based on what we truly need, not what we think we need or have been told we need.” She offers up her wisdom as a sex and intimacy coach, lessons learned from personal experience, and client stories, addressing the essential truth that we can only understand and love others as much as we love and understand ourselves.

How Therapy Can Help You Develop Emotional Intelligence

While these books provide helpful resources for building emotional intelligence, it may also be helpful to reach out to a mental health professional if you feel that you could improve in this area. A therapist can assist you in finding the tools you need to succeed in leadership, building healthy relationships, or discovering more about your own emotions.

Additional Resources

Education is just the first step on our path to improved mental health and emotional wellness. To help our readers take the next step in their journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy may be compensated for marketing by the companies mentioned below.

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For Further Reading

  • Best Books on Communication
  • Mental Health America
  • National Alliance on Mental Health
  • MentalHealth.gov
update history

We regularly update the articles on ChoosingTherapy.com to ensure we continue to reflect scientific consensus on the topics we cover, to incorporate new research into our articles, and to better answer our audience’s questions. When our content undergoes a significant revision, we summarize the changes that were made and the date on which they occurred. We also record the authors and medical reviewers who contributed to previous versions of the article. Read more about our editorial policies here.

  • Originally Published: December 15, 2020
    Original Author: Melissa Boudin, PsyD
    Original Reviewer: Trishanna Sookdeo, MD, MPH, FAAFP

  • Updated: May 15, 2023
    Author: No Change
    Reviewer: No Change
    Primary Changes: Updated for readability and clarity. Reviewed and added relevant resources. Added four new titles. New material reviewed by Dena Westphalen, PharmD.

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Headshot of Melissa Boudin, PsyD
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PsyD
Headshot of Trishanna Sookdeo, MD, MPH, FAAFP
Reviewed by:

Trishanna Sookdeo

MD, MPH, FAAFP
  • General Guides to Emotional IntelligenceGeneral Guides
  • Emotional Intelligence in Business & LeadershipBusiness & Leadership
  • Emotional Intelligence in RelationshipsRelationships
  • How Therapy Can Help You Develop Emotional IntelligenceHow Therapy Can Help
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