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21 Best Books on Self-Love

Published: April 14, 2023
Published: 04/14/2023
Headshot of Melissa Boudin, PsyD
Written by:

Melissa Boudin

PsyD
Dena Westphalen, PharmD
Reviewed by:

Dena Westphalen

PharmD
  • General Guides to Self-LoveGuides
  • Workbooks on Self-LoveWorkbooks
  • Additional ResourcesResources
Headshot of Melissa Boudin, PsyD
Written by:

Melissa Boudin

PsyD
Dena Westphalen, PharmD
Reviewed by:

Dena Westphalen

PharmD

There are times when self-love can feel elusive. We seem to be “programmed” to search for the approval of others, but when it comes down to the most important opinion—our own—it becomes more difficult to show ourselves kindness. It’s hard to look inward and love what you see. Fortunately, everyone is on this same journey, and some are further along than others, meaning they can provide wonderful advice based on research and personal experience.

The following list of books includes some of the best self-help books on the topic of self-love. They’re separated into two subgroups: general guides and interactive workbooks.

For our audience’s convenience, we include links to Amazon so recommended books can be easily purchased. Choosing Therapy may earn a commission from Amazon when purchases are made using the links on this page. Read more about our high editorial standards and advertising policy.

General Guides to Self-Love

Read through the following collection of ten books to find general guides on self-love for both men and women with a focus on psychological health, confidence, acceptance, and body positivity.

Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown1. The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You’re Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are

Brené Brown, the New York Times bestseller, researcher, and motivational speaker, has sold The Gifts of Imperfection in more than 30 languages, and Forbes calls it one of the “Five Books That Will Actually Change Your Outlook On Life.” Its main focus is giving readers confidence to propel themselves past paralyzing self-doubt into a world where they know their own worth and limitless potential. It also offers a way forward that embraces the perfection in imperfection.

The Self Love Experiment2. The Self-Love Experiment: Fifteen Principles for Becoming More Kind, Compassionate, and Accepting of Yourself

This book by Shannon Kaiser maps out a game plan to guide readers toward self-acceptance. Her aim is to help people know that they can and should put themselves first and chase their own dreams with fear of being selfish. The Self-Love Experiment has guided reviewers through the struggle of things like escaping debt, recovering from an eating disorder, drug addiction, corporate burnout, depression, and more.

Learn Mindfulness & Meditation

Learn the art of mindful living with over 2,000 mindful practices to train your brain. Stress less, sleep better, and deal with anxiety. Mindfulness.com has 4.5+ stars on both major app stores. Free 7-Day Trial

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by Mindfulness.com.

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You are a Badass by Jen Sincero3. You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life

Reviews call this book, “the self-help book for people who desperately want to improve their lives but don’t want to get busted doing it.” It’s a fun and entertaining guide, served up in bite-sized chapters full of personal stories from author Jen Sincero as well as advice, exercises, and inspiration. By its close, you’ll have a better appreciation for yourself, flaws and all, and a plan to live this life to its fullest.

Six Pillars of Self Esteem by Nathaniel Branden4. The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem: The Definitive Work on Self-Esteem by the Leading Pioneer in the Field

Nathaniel Branden’s classic, Six Pillars of Self-Esteem functions as a culmination of his clinical practice and studies that gives insight into human motivation and behavior. It demonstrates how self-esteem is the bedrock on which psychological health, achievement, and overall happiness is built upon. Branden also talks about what he describes as six pillars for self-esteem, exploring their importance in the workplace, parenting, education, psychotherapy, and general culture. It’s an excellent guide for people who in some way make self-esteem part of their career or life’s purpose whether they’re teachers, parents, managers, or therapists.

I Heart Me: The Science of Self-Love by David R. Hamilton5. I Heart Me: The Science of Self-Love

You can attain a greater sense of happiness and fulfillment when you learn to love yourself, connect with yourself, and increase your own self-worth and self-esteem. It’s an essential practice to help you navigate the ups and downs of life, making you feel secure and inspired to make choices that work for you. Before writing this book, author and scientist David Hamilton realized this his low confidence and lack of self-love was holding him back. So, he conducted an experiment using concepts of brain chemistry, neuroscience, psychotherapeutic, and personal development. I Heart Me details his interesting findinging and includes 27 exercises that he tested on himself.

6. UntamedUntamed by Glennon Doyle

Author Glennon Doyle wants to help readers find themselves, and the great success of her book, Untamed, seems to suggest she has done just that. People magazine calls her the “patron saint of female empowerment,” and hails her call to trust the voice inside as phenomenal. For many years, Doyle says she ignored her own discontent with life, burying herself beneath addictions, cultural conditioning, and institutional allegiances until she found her voice and power. In this memoir, you learn her story and discover how to follow suit and bring your whole self the table

Love Yourself Life Depends On It by Kamal Ravikant7. Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends On It

For author Kamal Ravikant, committing to the daily practice of saying “I love myself” out loud had a profoundly positive impact. Even if you don’t mean it at first, he says, you’re connecting neurons and laying the appropriate groundwork. He found that self-love is a lot like going to the gym. It’s a habit that needs to be incorporated into your everyday life, not practiced sporadically or as some kind of quick fix. It takes hard work—a process Ravikant breaks down into three steps he calls 1) Mental Loop; 2) Meditation; and 3) One Question.

Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Kristin Neff8. Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself

In this book, you’ll learn how to limit self-criticism, leave insecurity behind, and live a more fulfilling life.Self-Compassion offers expert advice from Kristin Neff, PhD, focusing on self-compassion versus plain old self-esteem. It provides action plans and exercises for dealing with the emotional struggle that comes hand-in-hand with many common human experiences like parenting, weight loss, addiction, and the trials of everyday life.

What a Time to Be Alone by Chidera Eggerue9. What a Time to Be Alone: The Slumflower’s Guide to Why You Are Already Enough

What a Time to Be Alone shows readers that being alone is not the same as being lonely. As a matter of fact, being alone and knowing your worth is powerful. Using a three part approach to gaining self-confidence and self-love that is full of sass and wit, author Chidera Eggerue delves into topics like deciding your own self-worth, avoiding toxic friendships, finding unity and togetherness with the rest of the world, and writing your own narrative.

The Body Is Not an Apology, Second Edition: The Power of Radical Self-Love by Sonya Renee Taylor10. The Body Is Not an Apology, Second Edition: The Power of Radical Self-Love

This book by activist and poet Sonya Renee Taylor says that systems of oppression gain power from humanity’s struggle to accept our differences or make peace with our bodies. The Body is Not an Apology claims that, once mastered, self-love is the solution. Plus, pulling ourselves out of our own shame puts us in a position to help others do the same. On a global scale, self-love could lead to an opportunity to create a more compassionate world for everyone.

Pretty Sure You're Fine11. Pretty Sure You’re Fine: The Health and Wellness Guide for Hypochondriacs, Overthinkers, and Worrywarts

In this hilarious yet practical guide you will receive the assurance you need that, in the midst of a world that celebrates fads and wellness trends (and maybe even pushes them), you are actually doing alright. In fact, you might not be the train wreck the world seems to want you to be. All about listening to and trusting your gut, Pretty Sure You’re Fine is as comforting as it is funny, with advice from mental and physical health experts on how to live confidently and love yourself fully.

How to Love Yourself12. How to Love Yourself (and Sometimes Other People): Spiritual Advice for Modern Relationships

This smart guide to loving yourself and others is meant for folks with a spiritual side. Authors and spiritual teachers Meggan Watterson and Lodro Rinzler use their knowledge about Christian mysticism and Buddhism to create a rich collection of lessons on how to stay open-hearted even during heartbreak. In the process, they share their personal stories to illustrate their points. This thoughtful guide offers multiple perspectives on self-worth, promoting self-love through all the ups and downs that life throws at you.

Radical Self Love13. Radical Self-Love: A Guide to Loving Yourself and Living Your Dreams

If you have been craving a little more happiness and fulfillment in your life, Radical Self-love is for you. Gala Darling, well-known author and motivational speaker, pulls from her own personal experiences of triumph over hardship. Including exciting illustrations about style and self-expression, this book will help you manifest limitless happiness without the weight of expectation and self-judgment. Every day should be a celebration!

Unfu*k Yourself14. Unfu*k Yourself: Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Life

The best way to describe this book is “BS-free.” Unfu*k Yourself cuts through the noise of modern self-help, providing a no-nonsense, tough-love approach to self-esteem, self-worth, and self-betterment. Gary John Bishop provides all the tools and tricks you need to become the best version of yourself and to stop participating in debilitating negative self-talk. Bishop leads readers down an entertaining path, teaching a series of seven assertions:

  1. “I am willing”
  2. “I am wired to win”
  3. “I got this”
  4. “I embrace the uncertainty”
  5. “I am not my thoughts; I am what I do”
  6. “I am relentless”
  7. “I expect nothing and accept everything”

Great Self-Care Gift Ideas For Yourself 


The 6-Minute Diary – Keeping a journal promotes mindfulness, happiness, and gratitude. The 6-Minute Diary uses the principles of positive psychology to inspire and encourage you to live your best life. Available in 7 Colors


Mindfulness.com – Learn the art of mindful living with over 2,000 mindful practices to train your brain. Stress less, sleep better, and deal with anxiety. Free Trial


Sunnyside – Want to drink less? Sunnyside helps you ease into mindful drinking at your own pace. Think lifestyle change, not a fad diet. Develop new daily routines, so you maintain your new habits for life. Take a 3 Minute Quiz.

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by Amazon, Mindfulness.com, and Sunnyside.

Workbooks on Self-Love

The next five books are interactive guides to learning self-love. They include prompts, exercises, and space to journal, taking the genre of self-help to the next level do-it-yourself.

Self Love Workbook for Women by Megan Logan15. Self-Love Workbook for Women: Release Self-Doubt, Build Self-Compassion, and Embrace Who You Are

Treating yourself with compassion can be difficult. However, with help from this interactive workbook by Megan Logan, readers can rediscover self-love, embrace their true self, and develop the confidence required to tackle life’s many challenges. Peppered throughout Self-Love, you’ll find tools, exercises, quizzes, affirmations, and more to help you reach your highest potential and prioritize self-care over people pleasing. Nurture your own happiness and lean into self-love.

The Self-Love Workbook: A Life-Changing Guide to Boost Self-Esteem, Recognize Your Worth, and Find Genuine Happiness by Shainna Ali16. The Self-Love Workbook: A Life-Changing Guide to Boost Self-Esteem, Recognize Your Worth, and Find Genuine Happiness

The Self-Love Workbook operates based on the belief that people need love from themselves just as much as they need love from others. It allows readers to become aware of their unique needs, discovering how to accept, appreciate, and love their true selves. Author Shainna Ali provides interactive activities, prompts for reflection, ongoing lessons, and helpful advice to conquer self-doubt.

Start Where You Are: A Journal for Self-Exploration by Meera Lee Patel17. Start Where You Are: A Journal for Self-Exploration

This interactive journal is designed to help people nurture their levels of self-love, self-motivation, creativity, inspiration, and mindfulness. By taking the time to know yourself, you can better navigate the chaos of life. Author Meera Lee Patel’s beautiful book features hand-lettering and art mixed with inspirational quotes, prompts, exercises, and plenty of room for reflection, appealing to those with a love of color and in need of positive change.

The Self Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Overcoming Self-Doubt and Improving Self-Esteem by Barbara Markway & Celia Ampel18. The Self Confidence Workbook: A Guide to Overcoming Self-Doubt and Improving Self-Esteem

The Self-Confidence Workbook by licensed psychologist Barbara Markway and writer Celia Ampel offers more strategies to get to know yourself, face debilitating fear, practice acceptance, and see results that are reflected back into your daily life. These two women help readers battle inner demons, navigate relationship landmines, determine their underlying values, and take necessary risks with a 5-step program that starts with setting goals and leads to checklists, interactive exercises, and quizzes to foster confidence.

The Self-Love Workbook for Teens: A Transformative Guide to Boost Self-Esteem, Build a Healthy Mindset, and Embrace Your True Self by Shainna Ali19. The Self-Love Workbook for Teens: A Transformative Guide to Boost Self-Esteem, Build a Healthy Mindset, and Embrace Your True Self

Self-love is a unique journey for teenagers, but equally if not more important for them than anyone else. Whether you’re reading this list of books as a teen yourself, or you know a teen who could use perspective and advice, take comfort in the fact that it is possible to change your attitude, love yourself, and navigate an intimidating world. The Self-Love Workbook for Teens offers fun, creative, research-backed exercises, lessons, and advice for those embarking on the lifelong journey of self-love.

Keep Moving: The Journal20. Keep Moving: The Journal

Renowned poet Maggie Smith created this healing journal as a way to get through her own heartbreak, pain, and loss by writing each and every day. The main goals of Keep Moving are learning how to look toward the future, find beauty in the present, reflect on joy, embrace change, and forgive yourself for mistakes of the past. Describing the book-writing process, Smith says, “I wasn’t offering wisdom from on high; I was talking to myself at the bottom of a dark well, trying to climb up into the light, little by little, day by day.”

Beautiful You21. Beautiful You: A Daily Guide to Radical Self-Acceptance

These days, society pushes an unrealistic beauty standard on women and young girls. The world of social media and modern media in general tells them they are not enough, but Beautiful You teaches readers to love themselves exactly as they are. Author Rose Molinary offers inspiration and practical tips to incorporate self-awareness, creativity, and mind-body connections into your daily life and shore up self-confidence and a healthy self-image.

Additional Resources

Education is just the first step on our path to improved mental health and emotional wellness. To help our readers take the next step in their journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy may be compensated for marketing by the companies mentioned below.

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For Further Reading

  • Best Books for Recovering People Pleasers
  • Mental Health America
  • National Alliance on Mental Health
  • MentalHealth.gov
update history

We regularly update the articles on ChoosingTherapy.com to ensure we continue to reflect scientific consensus on the topics we cover, to incorporate new research into our articles, and to better answer our audience’s questions. When our content undergoes a significant revision, we summarize the changes that were made and the date on which they occurred. We also record the authors and medical reviewers who contributed to previous versions of the article. Read more about our editorial policies here.

  • Originally Published: January 6, 2021
    Original Author: Melissa Boudin, PsyD
    Original Reviewer: Dena Westphalen, PharmD

  • Updated: April 14, 2023
    Author: No Change
    Reviewer: No Change
    Primary Changes: Updated for readability and clarity. Reviewed and added relevant resources. Added six new titles.

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Headshot of Melissa Boudin, PsyD
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PsyD
Dena Westphalen, PharmD
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Dena Westphalen

PharmD
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