Self-Worth Vs. Self-Esteem: Understanding the Differences

What Is Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem describes your thoughts and feelings about yourself. It is usually based on judgments you make about yourself in the moment.^1,2,3 People with low self-esteem are less self-confident and have more negative thoughts and feelings about themselves. Low self-esteem can be situational or chronic, with chronic low self-esteem being more likely to cause emotional and behavioral problems.

Because self-esteem involves your thoughts and feelings about yourself and your level of confidence, it isn’t stable or consistent.^1,3,4 Instead, it depends heavily on the outer world of people, tasks, and external information used to compare, judge, and evaluate yourself.

Self-evaluations that determine your self-esteem are largely based on:^1,2,5

• What personal strengths and weaknesses you are most focused on
• Positive and negative feedback you get from others
• Your general mood, stress level, and emotional states
• Comparisons you make between yourself and others
• Whether or not you reach a goal or expectation
• How you make sense of yourself and your experiences

What Is Self-Worth?

Researchers describe self-worth as a broader, more stable form of self-esteem that is less influenced by outside or inside factors.^1,4,5, Instead of focusing on specific traits, skills, circumstances, or achievements, self-worth describes the core beliefs you have about your worth and value.^1,2,5,6,7 Core beliefs tend to be consistent over time, which is why self-worth is less likely to change in response to feelings, thoughts, behaviors, or experiences.

A person with high self-worth is believed to have a more stable and positive form of self-esteem. It provides protection against stress and emotional problems, while also making a person healthier, happier, and more successful in life.^1,6,7,8

If you have high self-worth, you are more likely to:

• Believe you are good, worthy, and lovable, regardless of what’s happening in your life
• Feel deserving of love and respect from other people
• Accept and love yourself as you are now, with no conditions or exceptions
• Practice self-compassion and treat yourself with care, kindness, and respect
• Believe in your potential to grow, learn, change, and improve
• Have flaws and make mistakes that don’t threaten your identity or worth

Traits of Self-Esteem & Self-Worth

Not all researchers agree that self-esteem and self-worth are different, adding to confusion between the terms. Many researchers use the term self-esteem to describe both self-esteem and self-worth. Others have identified self-worth as being a form of self-esteem that is more “global,” less “contingent” on external circumstances, and more “stable” in the face of change.^1,2,3,5,6

While everyone struggles with occasional dips in self-esteem, those who have chronically low self-esteem may actually be struggling with low self-worth. Part of the confusion comes from not understanding the differences between the two.^1,3,5

Here are several characteristics of self-esteem:

• Thoughts and feelings about certain traits or skills
• Can provide temporary boosts in confidence
• Arises from self-judgment and evaluation
• Is conditional and contingent upon certain standards
• Finds value in the external world
• Is linked to confidence and motivation
• Negative feedback and stress can undermine its value
• Is fragile and less certain when threatened
• Uses competition and comparison to rise
• Reflects the ego or “false self”
• Is a scarce resource that needs constant renewal

Traits of self-worth include:

• Thoughts and feelings about the “whole” person
• Can provide a lasting feeling of security
• Arises from self-acceptance and compassion
• Does not have conditions or standards to meet
• Finds value in the internal world
• Is linked to emotional stability and self-control
• Feedback and stress reinforce the existing worth
• Is more resilient to external threats
• Uses inner beliefs to reinforce and remain stable
• Reflects one’s view of the “true self”
• Is an abundant resource that is self-renewing

5 Key Differences Between Self-Esteem & Self-Worth

While both involve a person’s overall thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about themselves, there are some key differences between self-esteem and self-worth. These differences involve where, when, and how often these two states of being show up. Self-esteem and self-worth also differ in how much they impact a person’s overall emotional stability and quality of life.

Here are five key differences between self-worth and self-esteem:

1. Self-Worth Is Deeper Than Low Self-Esteem

Low self-worth is similar to shame, which is driven by deep beliefs and feelings of being unworthy, bad, or “not good enough.” Self-esteem is also based on thoughts and feelings about yourself, but usually as a response to things happening in the moment, and how you’re perceiving these events.²

Core beliefs are often old, deep, and resistant to change. This makes self-worth issues more difficult to address because, unlike self-esteem, self-worth is unlikely to improve according to what you do, how well you do it, and other forms of external validation. These can boost your self-esteem, but they’re unlikely to change a core belief that you’re unworthy (a common belief in people with low self-worth).²

2. Self-Esteem Fluctuates More Than Self-Worth

Self-esteem fluctuates more than self-worth. For example, getting positive or negative feedback from a boss at work could cause self-esteem to go up or down, but it would have less of an effect on self-worth.^1,2,3,4

Internal and external triggers that could cause self-esteem to go up or down are:^1,3

• Achievements: How much you get done, how well you do, and benefits it gives you
• External feedback: Positive or negative feedback including criticism, praise, or approval
• Vocation and career: Your degrees, job title or role, career success, income, or status
• Beliefs & values: Your religious beliefs, morals, values, or strongly held opinions
• Comparisons: Your relative success, importance, or value compared to others
• Your relationships: Quantity or quality of relationships with friends or family members
• Physical appearance: Your body image, shape, size, or perception of attractiveness

3. Self-Esteem Is More Fragile Than Self-Worth

Because self-esteem is more vulnerable to internal and external factors, it is also more fragile. Many of the factors that influence it change frequently and are not always within your control.^1,3 Unless you have a strong “back-up” system of self-worth to rely on when your self-esteem takes a hit, the inevitable ups and downs of life may take a big emotional toll.

Experiences you might have when you’re stressed, anxious, or insecure include:^1,3,4,6

• Moodiness or feeling more depressed, anxious, irritable, or upset
• Becoming defensive, blaming others, or projecting anger on others
• Overusing unhealthy outlets like alcohol, drugs, or distractions to cope
• Less inner motivation and drive to focus and get things done
• An urgent need to do more or seek validation or reassurance to feel better
• Abandoning goals or projects that don’t provide immediate boosts in self-esteem
• Feeling less able to control urges and impulses

4. Self-Esteem Is More Judgmental Than Self-Worth

Self-esteem is a byproduct of your critical mind (the part that’s really good at finding and fixing problems). This part of your mind is always looking for new information it can use to evaluate and compare you to, including other people, their expectations, or your own expectations. This is why your self-esteem could be higher or lower depending on who you’re around or what situation you’re in.^1,3,5

Self-worth uses your inner critic in a different way. Because self-worth is mostly fixed and stable, it will use the critic to reinforce its existing beliefs about your worth, rather than recalculating according to the situation. This means that a person with low self-worth will often selectively reinforce their negative view of themselves by focusing on their failures and shortcomings while discounting their successes and strengths.

5. Self-Esteem Is Found in the World & Self-Worth Is Found Within

True self-worth comes from within, and unlike self-esteem, it does not need to be found, built, or rebuilt. While self-esteem is largely developed in response to things that happen in your life, how people respond to you, or how well you do at a task, self-worth is found inside.^2,6

The main differences that distinguish self-worth from self-esteem are:^2,5,6

• Self-worth is inherent, not something you need to earn
• Self-worth does not rely on comparisons to remain high
• Self-worth does not have conditions or contingencies you have to meet
• Self-worth does not change according to your successes and failures
• Self-worth comes from a deep, healthy, trusting relationship with yourself
• Self-worth is strengthened by knowing and showing your true self
• Self-worth can be cultivated through mindfulness and self-compassion

Causes of Low Self-Worth & Low Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem and self-worth are believed to come from a combination of external and internal factors. These factors cause some people to have naturally higher or lower self-esteem and self-worth. Researchers estimate that genes and biology determine about 50% of someone’s self-esteem, which includes factors like personality traits, predispositions, and psychological makeup.^7,8

The other half is believed to be developed by a person’s experiences, with early childhood experiences playing a central role. Parenting strategies are one of the biggest determining factors, and those with highly critical, abusive, or neglectful parents have the most negative impact.

To a lesser extent, experiences later in life can play a role in lowering self-esteem or self-worth, including severe trauma or being in an abusive relationship.^7,8

Low Self-esteem Vs. Low Self-worth: When & How to Seek Help

Because low self-esteem and low self-worth impact the way you think and feel about yourself, they can both have negative impacts on your life, work, and relationships. People with low self-worth and self-esteem are more likely to struggle with anxiety symptoms, depression, toxic stress, or addictive disorders. In some cases, self-esteem and self-worth issues can trigger these disorders, or at least contribute to their symptoms. Even without a pre-existing mental health condition, self-esteem and self-worth issues can cause a range of problems that may require counseling.

If you or a loved one is struggling with low self-esteem or self-worth, the best course of action is to start finding the right therapist. You can begin the search using an online therapist directory that allows you to find therapists with specific specialties or who are in-network with your insurance. A trained therapist can help you address the underlying causes of your self-esteem or self-worth issues, while also teaching you ways to begin building a healthier view of yourself.

Warning signs that may indicate you need to seek psychotherapy or other professional help are:

• Difficulty focusing and functioning at work, at school, or on other important tasks
• Negative changes in mood, including more stress, anxiety, irritability, or sadness
• Neglecting or procrastinating important tasks at work, school, or home
• Being less consistent with self-care, exercise, and wellness routines
• Negative thoughts about self, life, and future (e.g., pessimism, self-criticism, cynicism)
• Self-doubt and struggling to set goals, make decisions, and take on challenges
• Social isolation, withdrawing, shutting down, or lashing out towards others
• Overusing unhealthy outlets like drugs, alcohol, social media, or other distractions
• Poor boundary setting or allowing others to disrespect you or treat you poorly

Steps to Improve Your Self-Worth

Many people believe that improving their self-esteem is the solution to feeling better about themselves, but improving self-worth is more likely to provide lasting benefits. This is because self-worth is stable and consistent, whereas self-esteem constantly fluctuates. While it can be a slow and difficult process, there are some ways to work on improving your self-worth.

Here are five steps to improve your self-worth:

Stop Looking Outside Yourself for Validation

This includes looking for approval from your boss, social media followers, or even your friends or significant others. External approval can temporarily boost your self-esteem, but ultimately keeps you trapped in the same cycle of relying on external validation to feel good about yourself.^1,4

Increase Self-compassion & Be Kinder to Yourself

Research has proven that self-compassion pays dividends in almost all areas of life, including making you healthier, happier, and more successful.⁶ Being kinder in the way you talk to and treat yourself is a key step towards improving self-worth. Start this process by improving your emotional self-care and self-talk.

Separate What You Do From Who You Are

While you can still have goals for yourself, try not to wrap your identity, worth, or value into these. Instead, work to get in touch with your feelings, beliefs, and your core values (the things you want, need, and care about most in life). This reminds you that your worth is not tied to your successes and failures, while also helping you get in touch with deeper parts of yourself.^1,2,4,6

Stop Competing & Start Connecting

Interrupt yourself when you begin to compare yourself to others or feel the urge to compete. Instead, look for common ground, similarities, and things you can bond and connect over. This will help interrupt the unhelpful cycle of comparisons and judgments that feed into self-esteem issues, while also helping you feel more connected to people, which helps to boost self-worth.^4,6

Develop a More Positive Mindset

A positive, optimistic mindset forms a mental condition that is conducive to high self-worth, while negative thinking contributes to low self-esteem and self-worth.⁴ Negative thinking is often a bad mental habit, but one that can be broken with consistent practice.

Here are ways to develop a more positive mindset:^1,4,6

• Find ways your biggest weaknesses and flaws could also be strengths
• Look for the “lesson” in past mistakes and failures
• Look at challenges and hardships as opportunities to grow and learn
• See all feedback (even bad feedback) as valuable information to help you improve
• Know that experiencing difficult emotions helps make you a stronger person
• Look for ways to make things better after a mistake vs. giving up

Final Thoughts

Because self-worth comes from within, it is more stable and consistent than self-esteem, which is always fluctuating.^1,2,3 With intentional effort, time, and therapy, it is possible to build up self-worth and improve the way you think and feel about yourself. Doing so is hard, but it can provide lasting benefits for your mental health, happiness, and overall quality of life.