What to Do When You’re Feeling Stuck in Life: Advice From a Therapist

Is It Normal to Feel Stuck in Life?

It’s normal and not uncommon to feel “stuck” at times. Life can be challenging, and facing obstacles that make you feel trapped is natural. Sometimes feeling trapped can be easily remedied by doing something new, but change is not always easy. When feeling trapped becomes a persistent problem or makes you feel hopeless, you may need to re-evaluate your goals. What starts as negative thinking can eventually lead to anxiety and depression when not treated properly.

Why Do You Feel Stuck in Life?

Feeling stuck in life is a common experience that can be disheartening and isolating, and can be caused by a variety of reasons. You may be struggling with depression, anxiety, or another mental health concern. Or, you may be in a situation where you feel misaligned with your values and goals. Whatever your unique circumstance, recognizing the cause behind your feelings is essential for getting “unstuck.”

Below are reasons why you may feel stuck in life:

You Struggle With Depression

A common symptom of depression is anhedonia or a reduced ability to experience pleasure.¹ This and other symptoms can easily make you feel stuck in your life. Struggling with fatigue, loss of motivation, and sadness may leave you dissatisfied with your current situation.

You Experience Anxiety

Anxiety disorders can disrupt your life by impacting your relationships, self-confidence, and ability to complete daily tasks.²Along with anhedonia, these struggles can make you feel mentally and physically stuck with  an inability to change your life.

You’ve Outgrown Your Current Situation

We all change over time. That perfect job you landed a year ago doesn’t provide enough stimulation now that you’ve mastered it. Perhaps your relationship has lost its spark. Any of these situations can leave you wondering what direction to go next.

You Fear External Judgment

Sometimes, we worry a lot about what other people think about us and our lives. Input is helpful and can keep you on track. But investing too much stock in others’ opinions and viewpoints can be paralyzing.

You Feel Disconnected From Your Values

Life can lose its spark when you feel misaligned by your values. People tend to make choices based on their health (physical, mental, and spiritual), relationships, autonomy, and physical surroundings.³ You may feel trapped when your environment does not honor these desires and needs.

You’re Too Comfortable

Sometimes making a change could enhance your quality of life. Even with that knowledge, you may hold on to what is comfortable. For example, your current job offers perceived security and stability but could be more exciting and challenging. Becoming too attached to your routine may leave you feeling intellectually understimulated.

You’ve Lost Hope for the Future

Your thoughts are powerful. Negative thoughts, in particular, can be very influential and create sadness and anxiety. One study found that adverse circumstances can significantly limit our positive beliefs about future success.⁴ Perhaps you’ve had a rough year or are struggling with finances, relationship struggles, or similar situations. These challenges may dampen your ability to see a bright future, leading to feeling hopeless, stuck, and unmotivated.

You’re Overwhelmed or Burnt Out

Even if you know you would like to make changes, the possibility and pressure of your next move can cause stress. Fundamental and significant tasks can take a psychological toll, and the promise of a new life gets buried in red tape and prioritizing needs.⁴ Additionally, you could be experiencing burnout. Keeping your nervous system on high alert for extended periods can blur the lines between what is and isn’t harmful.

You’re Comparing Yourself to Others

Even though most of us try not to, we’re all guilty of comparing ourselves to others. This thought pattern is often unconscious but can lead to negative self-talk about your life and future. For instance, you may feel stuck when your friends or family members achieve or reach milestones you may have missed.

12 Ways to Stop Feeling Stuck in Life

Pushing past feeling stuck to make positive change can be challenging. You may feel indecisive, paralyzed by fear, and trapped by money, a job, people, or situations. However, tremendous progress is on the other side of your fear, as long as you have the courage and energy to go after it.

Here are 12 ways to stop feeling stuck in life:

1. Build a Support System

When you feel trapped or stuck, building a support system is essential. Surround yourself with positive people who will help you embrace change. Take in their honest feedback so you can make adjustments if there are areas where you can improve.

2. Identify What You Truly Want in Your Life

“Stuckness” can be a difficult-to-define feeling but often stems from something not being “right.” When you notice these feelings, allow yourself time to clarify what you can change. Is it a relationship? Are you unhappy with your current job? To identify what you’re actually wanting to change, you could say, “I want to increase my salary,” rather than, “I don’t want to take a pay cut.”

3. Take a Look at Your Life From a New Perspective

Remember that feeling “stuck” can simply be a mindset—although admittedly oppressive. But, with introspection and conscious effort, you can change your inner voice and perspective to be more flexible. Open yourself to new people and ideas. These changes will help you gain a new outlook on the future and what is possible.

4. Stretch & Get Regular Exercise

Exercise has many mental health benefits, and being active allows positive chemicals to flow through your body. Being outside and in nature also improves your well-being, so consider starting a walking meditation or pursuing walk-and-talk therapy. Many people find that exercise helps strengthen their clarity and boost their overall mental health. This, in turn, can support you in feeling less stuck overall.

5. Don’t Make Important Decisions Too Quickly

Give yourself space to clear your head, set a date to re-evaluate your situation, and allow yourself to live in the present until then. This practice will enable you to fully commit to change when you’re ready to do so, without questioning yourself and your future.

6. Take Small Actions to Avoid “Analysis Paralysis”

When combating feelings of “stuckness,” try breaking your goals into smaller, more manageable tasks. Ask yourself, “What’s the next smallest step I could take?” Identify any potential roadblocks or obstacles and devise a plan to overcome them. These small steps might feel minuscule, but imagine the pride and success you will feel when you see your progress!

7. Take Care of Physical & Mental Health Conditions

Symptoms of physical or mental health conditions may add to your feelings of being stuck. When you manage these conditions with therapy or medication, you can regain your motivation and sense of purpose. Positive change is hard to achieve when you struggle with constant fatigue, brain fog, or chronic pain.

8. Determine Your Life Purpose

When feeling stuck, take a step back and assess the situation. What is your “why”? What is your life purpose? This perspective may help you choose your path. Your life purpose is not just your job, responsibilities, or goals—it’s what makes you feel alive.

9. Become More Resilient

Resilience refers to how well you come back from setbacks. This skill can be built over time. One key to cultivating resilience is to get in a habit of viewing mistakes as learning opportunities. Instead of criticizing yourself when you mess up, ask, “What can I take away from this experience? How can this information help me move forward/”

10. Let Go of Unrealistic Expectations

Stuckness sometimes correlates with perfectionism. You might have such high standards for yourself that you avoid starting anything at all. This can also coincide with the fear of failure. Try to embrace having more realistic expectations with yourself. Likewise, breaking large goals into smaller tasks can give you momentum to take action in daily life.

11. Take Responsibility

Blaming others for your setbacks or focusing too much on what’s out of your control can perpetuate stuckness. Even though other circumstances can affect you, it’s important to also focus on where you do have control. This helps you embrace more of a thriving mentality, and that mentality can support you making positive, empowered choices.

12. Identify Cognitive Distortions

Cognitive distortions refer to irrational beliefs about yourself or others. For example, all-or-nothing thinking or assuming the worst-case scenario will inevitably happen are two examples of cognitive distortions. Getting stuck with these can maintain cycles of stuckness. Instead, be mindful that your thoughts may not be accurate and that you can still take action even if your thoughts tell you otherwise.

When to Seek Professional Support for Feeling Stuck

Some people may feel embarrassed when asking for support. In fact, mental health stigma often leads many to avoid treatment due to judgment or fears of being deemed incompetent.⁵ However, professional support allows you to acknowledge these human emotions and experiences in a safe, positive environment.

If you think you may have depression or want to work through your feelings of being stuck, start by making an appointment with a primary care provider, psychiatrist, psychologist, or social worker. These individuals can provide an accurate diagnosis and treatment plan. An online therapist directory can help you find a therapist, or various online therapy options are available if you prefer at-home treatment. Feeling stuck in life shouldn’t last forever—hope is just around the corner.