With symptoms like mood instability and poor self-image, someone with borderline personality disorder (BPD) can spiral into impulsivity, damaging relationships, and self-harm. Mindfulness is a tool to help them slow down, catch a breath, find relief, and observe emotions before reacting.1 In short, mindfulness teaches coping mechanisms for emotional situations.
What Is Mindfulness?
Mindfulness is centered on the present moment. It’s about observing experiences, emotions, and thoughts from a neutral perspective. The present-centered awareness can be achieved through meditation, walking, eating, yoga, or even coloring. Most commonly, the breath is used as an anchor, providing connection to the here-and-now.2
When we slow down and notice our breathing, allowing ourselves to be curious, we allow our thoughts to settle. As we notice our thoughts, we can choose to engage or let them go. By letting go of thoughts and returning attention to the experience of breathing, we mindfully regain autonomy over our thoughts and feelings. We are no longer driven by our emotions and can choose what to think about.
What BPD Symptoms Can Mindfulness Help With?
Borderline personality disorder is defined by emotional instability and insecurity, but mindfulness can help someone with BPD get perspective on how to react to these symptoms internally and externally. When they remember to take a breath and observe the present moment before reacting or responding, they can objectively view their emotions and thoughts about the situation first.3,4,5
Mindfulness Techniques & Practices for Borderline Personality Disorder
Mindfulness is versatile; its methods can be employed as needed to assist in deescalating intense situations. Techniques like Five Things, mindful walking, observing your thoughts, and practicing affirmations can be used on a more regular basis for subtle, long-term shifts in emotional management. If you forget to use these techniques, be kind to yourself. Self-criticism is a negative technique and will only make symptoms worse.
Five Things
When you feel flooded by emotions or thoughts, take a moment to focus on your senses. This technique is most useful for deescalation. If you’re feeling highly reactive, anxious, angry, or some other intense emotion, use Five Things to help ground you and find stability.
- Find five things you can see. Name them.
- Find four things you can touch. Touch them.
- Find three things you can hear. Listen.
- Find two things you can smell. Smell them.
- Find one thing you can taste. Taste it.
Identifying the need to employ this technique can be difficult when emotions overtake you. Find a way to remind yourself of this exercise like putting a note on your phone or a sticky note somewhere you’ll see it regularly.
Mindful Walking
Sometimes, creating physical space can be a more tangible way to approach emotional scenarios. Start with a deep breath and notice your body objectively, allowing it to exist as only a collection of muscles, organs, and tissue. Think about the muscles you will activate to take that first step. Will you start on your right or left leg? When you are ready, intentionally take a step.
Start slowly and notice the details. Feel the way your clothes move and how your feet feel inside your shoes. Notice your breathing as you walk, too. Practice scanning your body and being aware of everything that goes into each movement. Notice what sounds you hear either as a result of your steps or in the environment around you.
This activity requires your entire body and all of your attention. If you notice your mind wandering while you walk, there is no need to judge or criticize. That’s your mind doing exactly what it is intended to do. Gently bring your attention back to the experience of walking.
Observe Thoughts
Another way to practice mindfulness is to notice your thinking and differentiate it from yourself: “Watch” but don’t engage. There’s no need to follow thoughts, see where they go, or interact with them at all. Simply notice judgements, anxieties, daydreams, and plans as they float by. If a thought triggers an emotion, notice that it occurred, don’t engage, and watch it fade away.
Finding objectivity drains the power from thoughts and emotions, allowing them to simply be a function of your mind. They are not in control. Practice this method of mindfulness on a regular basis, preferably when calm. If emotions are high and thoughts are racing, it may be important to practice one of the more grounding exercises first.
Affirmations
As you practice differentiating between yourself and your thoughts and emotions, you can also start to mindfullychoose what to think about. If you have the choice, picking something positive can be helpful. In mindful dialogue, people are invited to think before speaking: Is it true? Is it helpful? Is it inspiring? Is it necessary? Is it kind?
If you notice self-deprecating or distrusting thoughts repeating, try to choose thoughts that are encouraging, uplifting, and rational instead. Select a mantra or affirmation like, “I can choose to be kind to myself (and others).” Repeat this mantra silently (or out loud). Doing so not only strengthens its meaning, but it also provides an anchor to help get through a moment of insecurity.
Benefits of Mindfulness on BPD Symptoms
The first benefit of mindfulness for BPD is that it’s free. It also pairs well with other well-being efforts like therapy. Plus, it can be done anywhere at any time; however, reading about mindfulness isn’t enough to build a strong foundation. Fortunately, there are apps and videos available online to help you learn.
Mindfulness can also have immediate results. When you take an intentional deep breath or notice your senses, you can physically feel your body settle. It’s important to remember that the long-term benefits of mindfulness take time, and it won’t make BPD go away, but it can help make it more manageable.
Who Can Help Me Develop Mindfulness Techniques For BPD?
Many therapists employ mindfulness techniques in their counseling, particularly for clients with BPD. Some of them may not even realize that their treatment methods are mindful because it’s been embedded in theories like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT).6
A healthy relationship between a client with BPD and their therapist is critical. Due to the interpersonal aspects of this diagnosis, there can be challenges in maintaining healthy boundaries between clients and therapists. It can be helpful to look for therapists who have specific experience working with someone with BPD, although all types of mental health clinicians can technically treat it. Try using an online directory like Choosing Therapy to search for profiles that list expertise with BPD and/or personality disorders.7,8
Final Thoughts on Mindfulness for BPD
Take a deep breath, feel your thoughts slow down, and invest your attention into the experience of breathing. This resource is here whenever you need it. Consider the use of mindfulness in addition to therapy for BPD or general mental health maintenance. If you are curious, consider looking into guided meditations and/or seeking out a mental health professional.
Additional Resources
- Mental Health America
- National Alliance on Mental Health
- MentalHealth.gov
- Online Therapist Directory: Sort therapists by specialty, cost, availability and more. Watch intro videos and see articles written by the therapists you’re considering working with. When you’ve found a good match, book an online therapy appointment with them directly.
Are you ready to connect with a therapist but feel a little overwhelmed by all your options? Speak with one of Choosing Therapy’s Client Navigators. Client Navigators are mental health professionals who will listen to what you’re looking for in a therapist and help pair you with the best possible fit. Getting started is free, easy, and confidential.
