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Newsletter

  • Mental Health Issues
    • Anxiety
    • ADHD
    • Bipolar Disorder
    • Depression
    • Grief
    • OCD
    • Personality Disorders
    • PTSD
  • Relationships
    • Dating
    • Marriage
    • Sex & Intimacy
    • Infidelity
    • Relationships 101
  • Wellness
    • Anger
    • Burnout
    • Stress
    • Sleep
    • Meditation
    • Mindfulness
    • Yoga
  • Therapy
    • Starting Therapy
    • Types of Therapy
    • Best Online Therapy Services
    • Online Couples Therapy
    • Online Therapy for Teens
  • Medication
    • Anxiety Medication
    • Depression Medication
    • ADHD Medication
    • Best Online Psychiatrist Options
  • My Mental Health
    • Men
    • Women
    • BIPOC
    • LGBTQIA+
    • Parents
    • Teens
  • About Us
    • Editorial Policy
    • Advertising Policy
    • About Us
    • Find a Local Therapist
    • Join Our Free Directory
  • Good Therapist QualitiesGood Therapist Qualities
  • Neurodiversity-AffirmingNeurodiversity-Affirming
  • Importance of FitImportance of Fit
  • Find A TherapistFind A Therapist
  • What to Look ForWhat to Look For
  • Review a ProfileReview a Profile
  • 1st Session1st Session
  • If You Can't FindIf You Can't Find
  • ConclusionConclusion
  • ResourcesResources
  • InfographicsInfographics

How to Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist

Headshot of Sharon Kay-O'Connor, LCSW

Written by: Sharon Kaye-O’Connor, LCSW

Rajy Abulhosn, MD

Reviewed by: Rajy Abulhosn, MD

Published: January 17, 2023
Headshot of Sharon Kaye-O'Connor, LCSW
Written by:

Sharon Kaye-O’Connor

LCSW
Headshot of Rajy Abulhosn, MD
Reviewed by:

Rajy Abulhosn

MD

If you’re autistic or neurodivergent and are seeking therapy, it can be challenging to find a therapist who understands the unique needs specific to the neurodiverse community. Fortunately, as the neurodiversity movement grows, and there becomes a greater acceptance of the neurodiversity perspective among clinical professionals, finding a neurodiversity-affirming therapist is more possible than ever.

Neuropsychological Testing For Children

  • Neurodiversity (including Autism Spectrum Disorder)
  • Attention / Concentration (including ADHD)
  • Learning Disorders (including Dyslexia)

Get answers in weeks, not months. Bend Health provides a complete neuropsychological report with in-depth findings, reviews with your school or pediatrician, along with a clinical diagnosis (if applicable). Plus, receive recommendations to support your child at home, in the community, and in the classroom. Learn more

Choosing Therapy is compensated for marketing by Bend Health.

Learn More

What Makes a Good Therapist?

When you are choosing the right therapist, it can be hard to figure out what qualities make them a good fit for you. Some of the qualities you look for will depend on who you are, what you value, what your goals are, and how you like to work through things.

A good therapist will:

  • Meet you where you are and help you learn more about yourself so you are able to better manage your concerns
  • Respect you and how you choose to identify
  • Be empowering, committed and challenge you to grow
  • Show an interest in you as a person and will remember the details you share with them
  • Help you feel like you are uncovering things about yourself and learning something new
  • Help you to ensure you maintain healthy boundaries and uphold themselves to the same

What Does it Mean to Be Neurodiversity-Affirming?

A neurodiversity-affirming therapist approaches therapeutic work with the understanding that autism, attention deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), dyslexia, Tourette’s syndrome (TS), obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), dyspraxia, and certain other conditions aren’t problems to be cured or solved, but individual neurotypes with unique strengths, needs, and challenges.1,2 The neurodiversity movement shifts away from the idea that brains falling outside of “typical” are “disordered.”

A neurodiversity-affirming therapist will possess a basic understanding of different types of characteristics unique to each neurotype. For example, they would have knowledge that an autistic client might have special interests or sensory needs. A therapist informed in neurodiversity would also be well-versed in areas specific to the neurodiverse community and the nuances of the experience of neurodivergent individuals.

Why Finding the Right Therapist Is so Important

In therapy, “goodness of fit” is a key element in the healing process. It’s important to work with a therapist who understands your unique experience of the world. As neurodivergent clients, it is also helpful when your therapist is knowledgeable about concerns such as sensory issues, anxiety specific to the neurodivergent experience, and autistic burnout.

Where to Find a List of Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapists

When seeking a therapist, start by asking the people you know if they have any referrals. Check to see whether they can refer you to that therapist’s website or provide other contact information. Often, primary care providers keep lists of mental health clinicians. You can also search through your health insurance to find a therapist who accepts your plan and specializes in specific areas (e.g., anxiety or depression).

An online directory also allows you to search and browse therapists, view their clinician profiles, and determine who might be a good fit. Additionally, you might consider checking with organizations that serve neurodiverse communities.

These organizations include:

  • Autistic Self-Advocacy Network (ASAN)
  • The Asperger/Autism Network (AANE)
  • Children and Adults with Attention Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD)

4 Things to Look For In a Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapist

When it comes to finding a neurodiversity-affirmative therapist, there are things to look for or consider, such as licensing, certifications, education, personality fit, availability, and cost.

Here are four things to look for in a neurodiversity-affirmative therapist:

1. Licensing, Certifications, & Education

Look for a therapist who is licensed to practice psychotherapy in your state. Different types of credentials include licensed clinical social workers (LCSWs), licensed clinical psychologists, licensed marriage and family therapists (LMFTs), licensed mental health counselors (LMHC), and licensed professional counselors (LPC). Psychotherapists should have a master’s or doctoral degree from an accredited university.

2. Personality Fit

Personality fit and comfortability with a therapist go a long way. When you feel like you can relate to your therapist, it makes the therapeutic process easier and more effective. You might search for someone of a particular gender or age range, or seek someone from a particular community (e.g., LGBTQ+ or someone from a particular religious background).

3. Scheduling & Availability

One of the challenges of finding a therapist is finding someone who has availability that works for you. When contacting a potential therapist, feel free to ask about their usual hours of availability. Let them know what times of day work best with your schedule (i.e., morning, afternoon, evening) or whether you require flexibility from week to week.

4. Cost

The most primary and practical concern of finding a therapist is cost. Sustained therapy is often essential, meaning that financial sustainability is an important consideration. Finding a therapist in-network with your insurance can make consistent long-term work a possibility. Also, check to see whether the therapist in question offers a sliding scale fee for therapy.

Resources For Autism

Pediatric Mental Healthcare For Autism Spectrum Disorder (ages 1 -17) Bend Health does not provide ABA Therapy. Bend Health is a virtual-first mental health care provider caring for kids, teens and their families. Build skills and routines that support your whole family with coaches, therapists and psychiatrists. For parent’s, Bend offers monthly progress updates and a peer support community. Many insurance plans are accepted. Learn More


Neuropsychological Testing For Children (including evaluations for Autism Spectrum Disorder, ADHD and Learning Disorders) Get answers in weeks, not months. Bend Health provides a complete report with in-depth findings, review with your schools, and a clinical diagnosis (if applicable). Learn more


Autism Support Group – Anytime, anonymous, and free. Never feel alone during life’s greatest challenges. Drop-in to live conversations and share thoughts, ask questions, or learn from others on the same journey. Join Circles Now

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and may be compensated for marketing by Bend Health and Circles.

How to Review a Therapist’s Profile or Website

When reviewing a therapist’s profile or website, check whether they mention experience in the areas of autism, ADHD, neurodiversity, etc. Some therapists who are neurodivergent themselves might put their neurotypes in their profile. As the neurodiversity movement grows, more therapists are becoming open about their own identities.3 Be sure to make note of any pathologizing or outdated language.

What to Ask During a First Call

After selecting a series of potential therapists, it’s important to ask questions during your first phone call or visit about their experience and what you can expect.

Here are questions to ask potential therapists:

  • Can you tell me a little bit about your experience working with autistic/ADHD/neurodivergent clients?
  • How/where did you learn about autism/ADHD/neurodiversity?
  • Are you autistic/ADHD/neurodivergent?
  • What are some of the main approaches you use in therapy (e.g., psychodynamic therapy or CBT)?
  • How long do clients generally stay with your practice?
  • Have you ever worked with (your specific area of concern)?
  • Do you offer remote sessions via phone or video?
  • Do you accept my insurance/offer a sliding scale fee?

What to Consider During Your First Appointment

The first few sessions are a time to get to know each other. Although this process can take a while, things to consider during the first session are: Do you feel comfortable speaking and sharing with your therapist? Do they seem curious and receptive? Do they seem to have expertise or understanding in the areas you would like to explore?

After three or four sessions, you’ll probably have a sense of whether your therapist is the right fit for you. Your therapist should also have a sense by then if they feel like they can adequately help you. If the therapist feels like a bad fit after three or four sessions, it’s OK to let them know and seek someone different.

What to Do if You Can’t Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist

If it is difficult to find a neurodiverse-affirming therapist where you live, you may want to explore teletherapy. Because most therapists are licensed by state, teletherapy would provide access to a wider range of therapists. If it still remains difficult to find a neurodiversity-affirming therapist, consider the possibility of online or in-person support groups or peer support from other individuals in the neurodiverse community.4

Although it might be difficult to find a therapist who is knowledgeable and well-versed in the strengths and challenges of the neurodiverse community, it may still be possible to find a therapist who is open to learning about your neurodivergent identity from neurodivergent sources.

Remember that new providers are entering the field all the time, so if it is difficult to find the right therapist, continue to check with insurance panels, online directories, and referral networks. New therapists in private practice tend to have the most availability.5

Final Thoughts

If you feel like you would benefit from speaking with a neurodiversity-affirming therapist, you aren’t alone. Fortunately, as acceptance of the neurodiversity movement grows, there is also a greater acceptance of the neurodiversity perspective among clinical professionals. Ultimately, when seeking a neurodiverse-affirming therapist, seek out someone who is warm and receptive to learning about you as an individual.

Additional Resources

Education is just the first step on our path to improved mental health and emotional wellness. To help our readers take the next step in their journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy may be compensated for marketing by the companies mentioned below.

Neurological Testing

Neuropsychological Testing For Children (including evaluations for Autism Spectrum Disorder, ADHD and Learning Disorders) Get answers in weeks, not months. Bend Health provides a complete report with in-depth findings, review with your schools, and a clinical diagnosis (if applicable). Learn more

Online Therapy & Coaching (ages 1 -17)

Bend Health is a virtual mental healthcare provider caring for kids, teens, and their families. Many insurance plans are accepted. Learn More

Autism Support Group

Circles – Anytime, anonymous, and free. Never feel alone during life’s greatest challenges. Drop-in to live conversations and share thoughts, ask questions, or learn from others on the same journey. Join Circles Now

Autism Newsletter – Free newsletter from Choosing Therapy for those impacted by autism or have a loved one on the autism spectrum. Get encouragement, tips, and latest info sent twice per week. Sign Up

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by Bend Health and Circles.

For Further Reading

  • Online Therapist Directory: Sort neurodiversity-affirming therapists by specialty, cost, availability and more. Watch intro videos and see articles written by the therapists you’re considering working with. When you’ve found a good match, book an online therapy appointment with them directly.
  • 15 Best Books on Autism
  • Mental Health America
  • National Alliance on Mental Health
  • MentalHealth.gov

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Is OCD Related To Autism?

At first glance, individuals with OCD and autism spectrum disorders (ASD) might appear to show similar behaviors and symptoms, engaging in repetitive actions, having higher-than-normal anxiety levels, experiencing “obsessions” of one sort or another, and so on. But how do they compare when you take a closer look? Read More

What’s the Difference Between Stims, Tics, and Compulsions?

At first blush, tics, stims, and compulsions can look pretty similar to the untrained eye. All three are repetitive behaviors that are seemingly involuntary. They all have a coping or self-regulatory function and can show up in a wide variety of ways. They’re also all associated with distinct underlying conditions. It’s these distinct root causes that tell mental health care providers how to treat them or whether to treat them at all. Yet another thing stims, tics, and compulsions share is that two or even all three can show up in the same person simultaneously. Learn More

This content is sponsored By NOCD.

How to Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist Infographics

What to Do if You Can't Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist Why Finding the Right Therapist Is so Important What Does It Mean to Be Neurodiversity-AffirmingWhat Does It Mean to Be Neurodiversity-Affirming

Sources Update History

Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.

  • Exceptional Individuals (2020). Neurodiversity: Meaning and Disorder Types. London, England. Retrieved from: https://exceptionalindividuals.com/neurodiversity/

  • Litchfield, Ryan. (December 16, 2020). Peer Support Brings Hope and Strength for Autistic Communities. Retrieved from: https://researchautism.org/peer-support-brings-hope-and-strength-for-autism-communities/

  • Engelbrecht, Natalie (December 18, 2020). Autistics Make Excellent Therapists. Embrace Autism. Retrieved from: https://embrace-autism.com/autistics-make-excellent-therapists/

  • Brown, Lydia (August 4, 2011). The Significance of Semantics: Person-First Language: Why is Matters. Retrieved from: https://www.autistichoya.com/2011/08/significance-of-semantics-person-first.html

  • Kaye-O’Connor, Sharon (March 9, 2021). What is Neurodiversity? Choosing Therapy. Retrieved from: https://www.choosingtherapy.com/neurodiversity/

Show more

We regularly update the articles on ChoosingTherapy.com to ensure we continue to reflect scientific consensus on the topics we cover, to incorporate new research into our articles, and to better answer our audience’s questions. When our content undergoes a significant revision, we summarize the changes that were made and the date on which they occurred. We also record the authors and medical reviewers who contributed to previous versions of the article. Read more about our editorial policies here.

January 17, 2023
Author: No Change
Reviewer: No Change
Primary Changes: Updated for readability and clarity. Reviewed and added relevant resources. Added “What Makes a Good Therapist?”. New material written by Silvi Saxena, MBA, MSW, LSW, CCTP, OSW-C and reviewed by Kristen Fuller, MD.
August 17, 2021
Author: Sharon Kaye-O’Connor, LCSW
Reviewer: Rajy Abulhosn, MD
Show more

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