10 Ways to Deal With Holiday Stress

What Is Holiday Stress?

Holiday stress refers to a unique type of stress that arises in response to the demands and expectations of the holiday season. It generally starts just before Thanksgiving and can linger until after New Year’s Day. Holiday stress can range in severity and type, whether it’s anxiety over hosting events, concerns about finances, or heightened symptoms of existing mental health issues. The pressure to meet seasonal expectations can intensify feelings of overwhelm, frustration, and fatigue.¹

Signs of holiday stress can be subtle but significant, and may include:²

• Increased irritability
• Quick to anger
• Gastrointestinal distress
• Insomnia or other sleep problems
• Appetite changes
• Fatigue/low energy
• Poor concentration
• Racing thoughts
• Headaches
• Neck or back pain

10 Tips to Cope With Stress

Stress may be inevitable during this time of year. However, it’s still important to identify and implement healthy ways to cope with your stress during the holiday season. Be mindful of your triggers and aim to set realistic expectations for yourself. Remember that no holiday needs to be perfect to be enjoyable, and it can still be okay if things don’t go according to plan.

Tips to cope with holiday stress include:

1. Create a Master Schedule for Events & Obligations

Writing everything down can help you feel organized and prepared. This mitigates the stress of buying last-minute gifts or realizing that you have an event to attend that seems to have snuck up on you.

2. Consider Sticking to a Budget

If you struggle with overspending, consider making a budget for the holidays (that includes food, decorations, and presents). Even if you don’t stick to it perfectly, having a roadmap may help you feel more grounded.

3. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness can help with holiday stress because it allows you to better focus on the present moment. Practice deep breathing and drawing your attention to the here and now when you feel overwhelmed.

4. Say No

 It’s okay to say no and turn down social events that you anticipate might drain your energy or exacerbate resentment.

5. Think About What’s Most Important to You

 It may be helpful to keep the big picture in mind if you frequently feel anxious about all the little details. Ask yourself what feels most important during the holidays.

6. Be Mindful of Perfectionism

Striving for perfectionism often makes holiday stress worse. Although it may be easier said than done, remember that ‘good enough’ can undoubtedly be ‘good enough!’

7. Write Down Your Gratitude Each Day

Practicing gratitude can help you harness a greater appreciation for your daily life. This may not prevent stress, but it can mitigate its impact on your well-being.

8. Try to Stick to a Routine

 As much as possible, aim to ground yourself with some sense of structure each day. This predictability can help you feel more balanced as you move through the ups and downs of the season.

9. Get Moving

Staying active year-round is a good way to manage stress and combat seasonal affective disorder and depression. Aim for 20 minutes of exercise four or five days a week at a minimum.

10. Reach Out for Help

If you know you’re affected by increased stress around the holidays, talk to friends and family about how you’re feeling. Ask for help setting boundaries and practicing self-care.

Extreme anxiety or depression around the holidays could be a sign of  holiday depression and should not be ignored.Talk to your primary care provider or look into online therapy to find a therapist to help manage symptoms of depression, anxiety, and stress.

Causes of Holiday Stress

Although the holiday season can be exciting and festive, it also comes with its own set of pressures and demands. Many people can relate to the perils of overcommitting themselves or dealing with complicated family dynamics. Others may find themselves triggered to engage in maladaptive behaviors, including overeating, substance use, or spending too much money.

Common causes for holiday anxiety include:

Too Many Activities

Too many social obligations can quickly feel overwhelming, especially if you’re agreeing to events or obligations that you don’t really want to do. This may magnify feelings of resentment, which can perpetuate more stress. In addition, overextending yourself with too many activities can also make it hard to practice self-care at a time when it’s often crucial.

Overindulgence in Food & Drink

It’s typical for people to eat and drink more alcohol than usual during the holiday season. But this can be a source of stress for people, especially those with histories of disordered eating, eating disorders, or substance use disorders. In addition, nutritional deficiencies or irregular eating can contribute to behavioral symptoms such as fatigue, irritability, and low mood, which may amplify stress.³

Overspending & Breaking Your Budget

Money-related stress is often in full force this time of year. However, people often feel immense pressure to “keep up” and maintain a certain lifestyle that coincides with the holidays. With that, research shows that half of Americans intend to take on debt to pay for the holidays.⁴ Unfortunately, this means the financial stress often persists long after the festivities end.

Too Much Time With Loved Ones

People with complicated family dynamics may notice that they feel more stressed this time of year if they’re spending more time together. Old dynamics, power differentials, and boundary issues often come into play. And even if you get along relatively well, there can still be a social burnout effect that occurs within families.

Too Little Time With Loved Ones

Spending too little time with family can also be stressful. People often hold onto traditional notions that an enjoyable holiday season entails close familial relationships. When family members live far away or have more estranged relationships it can trigger complicated feelings of loneliness during the holidays, sadness, or anger, which can also amplify holiday stress.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

SAD affects approximately 5% of U.S. adults.⁵ SAD consists of a combination of depression symptoms, including persistent sadness, loss of interest in usual activities and relationships, feelings of worthlessness or disproportionate guilt, and problems with concentration. Left untreated, these symptoms often worsen stress.

Mental Health Struggles

People with anxiety or depression often notice their symptoms worsen during the holiday season. This often has to do with the pressure and expectations that come with the holidays. There can also be a desire to “mask” how one feels, particularly when engaging in social events. This suppression may exacerbate feelings of isolation and make the stress worse.

Grief and Loss

The holidays can be difficult for people actively experiencing grief. This may occur regardless of when the specific loss happened. There may be uncertainty about how to proceed with certain rituals. Some might want to opt out of particular traditions altogether. This ambiguity can cause stress, especially if family members disagree about how to honor particular parts of the holiday.

Treatment for Stress

In most cases, holiday stress dissipates once the holiday is over and won’t require treatment. However, it’s no secret that many people experience extraordinary levels of chronic stress regularly. Research shows that upwards of 57% of Americans feel paralyzed by their own stress.⁶ If you feel you can’t manage your stress on your own- or your symptoms are negatively affecting your quality of life- professional treatment can help.

Treatment options for chronic stress include:

• Cognitive behavior therapy: CBT for stress could help reduce holiday stress by teaching you how to reframe negative or unrealistic thoughts into more adaptive ones. This, in turn, can help you feel better about navigating the holidays. You can opt for CBT therapy or use various CBT apps for stress relief.
• Dialectical behavior therapy: DBT focuses on themes of mindfulness, distress tolerance, emotional regulation, and interpersonal effectiveness. Working on these areas may improve stress symptoms.
• Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy: MBCT blends cognitive principles with mindfulness to better manage stress.
• Acceptance and commitment therapy: ACT primarily integrates behavioral strategies with mindfulness to help people act in ways that best align with their values. This can help you orient your holiday season in a way that brings forth more meaning and purpose to you.
• Group therapy: Group therapy can be beneficial in showing you that you’re not alone with your feelings or difficulties. Groups may focus on pertinent themes of healthy living, coping skills, stress management, and self-esteem.

When to Seek Professional Help

Holiday stress may coexist with other mental health issues, including depression, anxiety, substance use, eating disorders, and more. If you already experience chronic stress, the holidays can make it worse. Seeking professional support can help you feel more empowered during this vulnerable time of year. A therapist can provide you with guidance and coping skills for managing your stress.

When it comes to therapy, the relationship with your therapist is paramount. Look for a therapist who specializes in stress management- you can use an online therapist directory or an online therapy platform to vet potential candidates. If you’re struggling with stress on top of a mental health disorder, you may also want to consider seeking a medication evaluation. Most psychiatrists offer a variety of in-person or online psychiatry options.