Divorce or separation is never easy. Even in amicable cases, there may be unresolved feelings of anger, betrayal, confusion, or the grief of losing the relationship. Regardless of how it happens, these books on divorce are here to guide you through the practical impacts, the emotional difficulties, and everything in between.
Self-Help Divorce Guides & Workbooks
1. The Divorce Recovery Workbook: How to Heal from Anger, Hurt, and Resentment and Build the Life You Want
Between the legal ramifications, unresolved emotions surrounding your separation, or the myriad of other complications, divorce throws a lot at you. This workbook helps separated couples through every stage of the divorce. It encourages readers to find peace after such a huge change and empowers them to move on after their divorce in healthy ways, to live the life of healing they deserve.
2. Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You
This break-up specific book is still useful for anyone facing a divorce. This tough-love guide gives you actionable tasks for moving on, from going no-contact with your ex to understanding that this was very likely the best outcome for you, and even advice for dating again.
3. I Just Want This Done: How Smart, Successful People Get Divorced without Losing their Kids, Money, and Minds
If you’re looking for a frank, straightforward way to get through your divorce without losing your sanity, this book by family law attorney Raiford Palmer is for you. He outlines exactly what to expect in the legal process, including debunking common myths, minimizing costs, choosing the right divorce lawyer, etc.
4. Cutting Loose: Why Women Who End Their Marriages Do So Well
Did you know that one of every two modern marriages ends in divorce? Did you also know that 75% of those divorces are initiated by wives? Ashton Applewhite’s book, Cutting Loose, was written for any woman who is contemplating divorce. It is a comprehensive guide on how to make the decision, what to expect, and how to protect yourself financially and emotionally.
Reviewers call Cutting Loose an essential resource and a “reality check” for anyone who wants or needs to leave their marriage but fears the consequences. Applewhite also introduces 50 diverse women who feared divorce but ultimately thrived in their new roles as single women.
5. Conscious Uncoupling: 5 Steps to Living Happily Even After
Conscious Uncoupling provides a step-by-step guide to living well even after a divorce. It recognizes that even though many of us were raised on a fairy-tale depiction of love, many relationships don’t work out. Instead of viewing this as a personal failing, author Katherine Woodward Thomas suggests we shift our perspective and view divorce as an opportunity to move forward with mutual respect, kindness, and self-love.
The five-steps of Conscious Uncoupling are:
- “Find emotional freedom”
- “Reclaim your power and your life”
- “Break the pattern, heal your heart”
- “Become a love alchemist”
- “Create your happy even after life”
Memoirs About Divorce
6. How to Sleep Alone in a King-Size Bed: A Memoir of Starting Over
Author Theo Pauline Nestor’s life caved in when she kicked her gambling husband out of her home. Forced to return to the workforce and provide for her children, Nestor recounts the immediate aftermath of her divorce and the depression she experienced with startling honesty: “I feel like I’ve joined an enormous club, something like the Veterans of Foreign Wars. We are weary with battle fatigue and sometimes even gripped by nostalgia for the good old, bad old days, but our numbers are large,” she writes.
7. Aftermath: On Marriage and Separation
Author Rachel Cusk unpacks her own separation and the stages of grief she went through in this memoir. She also dives into the societal impact of divorce, from those affected to those who witness it. Known for her razor-sharp wit and humorous brevity, Cusk’s book offers personal insight and hope in a transformative time.
8. The Book Of Separation: A Memoir
The Book of Separation is a memoir about a woman who walks away from her faith and her marriage in order to go on a journey of liberation and self-discovery. Author Tova Mirvis was raised in an intense and close-knit Orthodox-Jewish family. From a young age, she was taught the importance of getting married and starting a family, and she did so quickly.
At forty, Mirvis realized she needed to step away from the oppressive life that, in many ways, was chosen for her. This memoir is a story of self-discovery, but also one of struggle, as she tries to help her children come to terms with the divorce and shift in religious perspective.
For Older Adults Getting Divorced
9. Divorce After 50: Your Guide to the Unique Legal and Financial Challenges
Divorce is difficult in any situation, but breaking apart a life that has been built over the course of decades takes careful consideration. From healthcare to retirement planning, there are a multitude of unique issues facing middle-aged and older divorcees, and this book outlines how to tackle them.
For Navigating Co-Parenting During & After Divorce
10. Talking to Children About Divorce: A Parent’s Guide to Healthy Communication at Each Stage of Divorce: Expert Advice for Kids’ Emotional Recovery
Therapist Jean McBride offers concrete advice and a steady framework for separating parents to talk about divorce with their children and navigate through the emotional and physical complexities of what life can look like afterwards.
It includes helpful scripts for each stage of divorce, including breaking the news and validating children’s emotions during an understandably difficult time.
11. The Co-Parenting Handbook: Raising Well-Adjusted and Resilient Kids from Little Ones to Young Adults through Divorce or Separation
Parenting is hard enough on its own, but divorce or separation can make it feel nearly impossible. This handbook shares advice from divorce and co-parenting coaches, with their framework for successfully parenting children in the aftermath of divorce.
It includes sections on resolving daily issues, creating boundaries, and navigating the emotional needs of your children so they are always put first.
12. Blend: The Secret to Co-Parenting and Creating a Balanced Family
In 2010, author Mashonda Tifrere and music producer Swizz Beats finalized their divorce. Blend is Tifrere’s offering to anyone who ever goes through a divorce when kids are involved. It provides insider information about how Tifrere and her husband created a new, blended family for their son, Kasseem, that included Alicia Keys (Swizz’s new wife).
While Blend is absolutely a personal story, it also shares universally-relevant insight gained from family therapists, parenting experts, and other blended families. The result is an incredible resource for anyone who is going through divorce and learning how to create a balanced family.
13. Nesting After Divorce: Co-Parenting in the Family Home
Nesting After Divorce by Beth Behrendt is a co-parenting guide that takes a child-centered approach to raising kids after a divorce. The research is clear that, when a couple decides to divorce, the children (if there are children) suffer the most due to constant change and shifting between homes. So, when Behrendt got divorced, she created a better way – nesting.
To “nest” means she ultimately gave her children custody of the home while she and her ex-husband moved in and out of it. If that sounds confusing or impossible, this step-by-step guide may be for you. She outlines the necessary steps and provides advice to help you decide whether nesting is right for you and your family.
Books for Kids About Divorce
14. Two Adventures with Mom and Dad: Explaining Divorce to Young Children
For young children, the concept of divorce is completely foreign. This picture book, written by a family law attorney, helps children understand what to expect in the future and provides them with a framework to go forward. Parents say it has helped their kids understand that they are still loved and treasured, regardless of the changes that are happening in their life.
15. Two Homes Filled With Love: A Story about Divorce and Separation
The popular “My Dragon” book series now includes a sincere and compassionate story about Drew and his dragon comforting a friend whose parents are no longer together. This sweet picture book reminds children that regardless of what house they live in, they are loved and supported no matter what.
Consider Seeing a Divorce Counselor
If you and your ex are having difficulties navigating all the details of divorce, it can be helpful to meet with a divorce counselor who can make sure both parties are being heard and can assist in ironing out any continued conflicts.
