9 Strategies to Help Stressed Moms Cope

Common Stressors Mothers Deal With

Stress for mothers stems from multiple and intersecting categories, including how little time they have for themselves, shouldering the logistical demands of a household, and often being the family point person for decisions, big and small. 

Moms may also struggle with working from home, lack of childcare access, and medical stress related to fear of illness. A combination of these stressors may even lead to burnout or depression for stay-at-home moms or mothers working a job (or multiple) inside or outside the home. 

Common motherhood stressors include:¹

• Lack of alone time
• Feeling a need to “get it at all done”
• Juggling work-life balance as a primary caretaker
• Mom burnout
• Income concerns due to lack of care for children
• Relationship issues
• Caregiving for both children and aging family members
• Caregiver burnout
• School/daycare closings and childcare logistics
• Feeling like there is much to do and not enough time
• Frustration or anger at a lack of resources or support
• Social comparison to other moms
• Lack of time for physical activity
• Over-scheduled children/family demands
• Unrealistic demands and expectations from supervisors/career

9 Strategies to Help a Stressed Mom Cope

Just like becoming a frazzled mom did not happen overnight, relief from feeling this way doesn’t happen immediately. However, incorporating small and actionable steps to manage stress can help you start feeling better and more in control.

Here are 9 practical tips to help moms manage stress:

1. Get Comfortable Saying “No”

Setting boundaries is crucial when navigating stress as a mother. Learning to say no is a great way to establish healthy boundaries and stop you from feeling excess stress. Spend time deciding what you are and are not willing to tolerate, and evaluate if you can change your current situation to suit these limits and reduce mental load.

2. Identify Stressful Activities

Identify what activities/daily routines create stress and find one way to make them less stressful. For example, make lunch the night before or have your kids help if this morning always makes you late. Sometimes, moms take on tasks others or their children can do because they know they can get the work done faster or “better.” Identify the tasks that stress you out and rework or assign them to another family member.

3. Create a Mommy “Do Not Disturb” Sign

Even if your children cannot read, you can hang up something similar to a traffic stop sign. Indicate that this sign means mom is unavailable. Setting this visual, external boundary signifies to others that you need a moment and models they can do the same when necessary. This way, everyone in the family knows your boundaries, and you can take time to rest and recharge.

4. Evaluate Where YOU Want Work & Family Life to Intersect

Since the pandemic, work-family balances have drastically shifted, often without deliberate protocols or conversations with employers. Carefully evaluating where your work and family lives intersect and deplete you is a joint employer/employee exercise that can be helpful.²

Perhaps this means you adjust your hours for logging on for telework, or you perform work-from-home duties for a set number of hours per day–delineating how you’ll spend your time can help.