Caregiver burnout involves caring for others while neglecting one’s own needs at great personal cost. Feelings of helplessness, anger, sadness, and fatigue can emerge. Caregivers can help alleviate these emotions and prevent caregiver burnout by creating realistic expectations for themselves. Working with a therapist can help caregivers to understand ways to break this cycle.
What Is Caregiver Burnout?
Caregiver burnout is a feeling of being overwhelmed physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually when taking care of someone with major health issues. It occurs when people experience an extended period of stress associated with their role as a caregiver. They may not be aware it is happening because they are focused on the person they are taking care of rather than themselves.
People who experience caregiver burnout often feel that they are being pulled in many directions. They are exhausted. This can cause feelings of dissatisfaction with themselves, their relationships, and their ability to complete necessary daily tasks. This type of burnout can result in feeling immobilized and helpless.
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Caregiver Burnout Vs. Compassion Fatigue
Compassion fatigue involves a strain of feeling for someone else’s pain.1 It results from extended exposure to working with people who are in crisis. People begin to feel and empathize with the pain of those they are helping. Examples of people who are at risk for compassion fatigue include first responders, doctors, and those who serve in the military. They are repeatedly confronted with traumatic situations and the emotional distance between themselves and those they help grows smaller.
The symptoms occurring with compassion fatigue and caregiver burnout can be similar, such as stress, helplessness, and depression. However, unlike compassion fatigue, caregiver burnout has no relationship to ongoing, repeated trauma.
What Is the Difference Between Caregiver Burnout and Depression?
One of the symptoms of caregiver burnout may be depression. Depression is a mood disorder, which involves a changed state of mind. It can be caused by genetics, hormones, or a chemical imbalance. It can also result from a traumatic situation or a sudden loss or life crisis.
Caregiver burnout primarily stems from the stress related to caregiving. If the stress is removed, the feelings related to burnout usually will lessen. Regardless, depression and burnout can share some symptoms. Anxiety, sadness, and fatigue are examples of these symptoms, as well as a general sense of feeling overwhelmed.
How Common Is Caregiver Burnout?
Caregiver burnout is extremely common. The Archangel Study, which looked at caregivers of children and adults during the Covid19 pandemic, found that 57% of caregivers reported high levels of stress, anxiety, and depression. Caregivers reported using medication, alcohol, and emotional eating to cope. Many caregivers still work full time while caring for their family members, and are struggling to keep up with the demands.1
Caregiver Burnout Symptoms
The critical symptom alerting caregivers that they may be experiencing burnout is ongoing feelings of exhaustion and stress. Exhaustion is a trigger for many of the major symptoms that evolve from burnout.
- A feeling of apathy or “not caring” as much
- Dreading the next day
- Feeling overwhelmed by tasks and responsibilities
- Becoming more cynical or negative
- Feeling shut down or detached
Signs of Caregiver Burnout
Caregivers who try to manage all aspects of care for a loved one are most at risk to experience caregiver burnout. Signs that they are burnt out include withdrawing socially, changes in sleep, increased anxiety, and feeling out of control.
Common signs of caregiver burnout include:
- Social isolation
- Depressed mood
- Irritability
- Angry outbursts, loss of temper
- Feelings of helplessness
- Feelings of loss of control
- Increased alcohol or drug use
- Onset of medical issues such as stomach/digestive problems, body aches, headaches
- Inability to concentrate or focus
- Increased anxiety
- Loss or negative changes in relationships
- Loss of interest in things you used to enjoy
- Revenge bedtime procrastination
- Changes in sleep patterns
What Causes Caregiver Burnout?
Caregiver burnout occurs because caregivers are focused on taking care of others, not paying attention to what is happening to themselves along the way. They are unaware of (or ignore) negative changes in their physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual health. This dynamic extending over time paired up with unrealistic caregiver self-expectations often ends with caregiver burnout.
Common causes of caregiver burnout include:2
- Emotional demands resulting from the care receivers’ condition: An extreme degree of physical and emotional care is needed. There is no way to make your loved one “well.”
- Conflicting demands: Trying to meet the needs of spouses, children, employers, and co-workers creates conflict and stress.
- Ambiguity of roles: Sometimes caregivers do not know exactly what their roles and responsibilities are in relation to those around them.
- Workload: There is simply too much to do and not enough time.
- Conflicting policies and procedures: Prevents professional caregivers from doing what they believe is appropriate and family caregivers receiving what they want and need.
- Lack of privacy: There is no time to be alone.
What Is the Long-Term Impact of Caregiver Burnout?
Caregiver burnout can lead to serious long-term consequences if not addressed. Chronic stress leads to physical health problems. Many caregivers find themselves struggling financially, digging into their savings or going into debt. Caregiver burnout can also cause strained relationships, not only with the person they are caring for, but also with others.
Some of the long-term effects of unaddressed caregiver burnout include:
- Chronic stress
- Physical health problems
- Mental health concerns
- Financial problems
- Problems at work
- Strained relationships
Can Caregiver Burnout Be Prevented?
The key to preventing burnout is to not wait till you find yourself incapacitated. Be proactive and aware in terms of monitoring yourself and how you feel and function. Self-awareness is imperative, and it will make you a better caregiver. If caregiver burnout symptoms begin to appear, take action immediately. Identify the stressor and implement actions to alleviate the stress. It may mean asking for support in your caregiver role.
Here are some tips for preventing caregiver burnout:
- Have a trusted confidant: It is important to have at least one person you can talk to about the challenges you are facing. While it’s not good to dwell on negativity, it is good to have a trusted sounding board to help process your feelings.
- Don’t avoid your negative feelings: Negative feelings need to be felt, processed, and released. Stuffing them down or pretending everything is great will just backfire later. Journaling, drawing, talking with a friend, or even just talking out loud can be helpful.
- Set realistic goals and celebrate small wins: Set small, achievable goals for yourself and celebrate those small wins. This time of life may not allow you to reach your big milestone goals just yet, but you can still take small actions each day to get you closer.
- Learn more about your loved one’s condition: Understanding as much as you can about your loved ones condition can be a powerful tool, not only for caring for them, but also for knowing what to expect and coming to acceptance with their condition and future.
- Make time for self-care: You may have heard the saying “you can’t pour from an empty cup,” and this has never been more true than when in a caregiver role. It is critical to care for yourself first and fill your own cup before pouring out your energy for others.
- Focus on what you can control: When a loved one faces a chronic or serious health condition, there are so many things out of your control. Focus on the things you can control, like what you do to take care of yourself, what you focus on, and how you want to show up for yourself and others.
When to Get Professional Help for Caregiver Burnout
Carefully examine your level of satisfaction with how you are meeting daily demands, relationships, and responsibilities.
If these scenarios describe your experience, seek professional counseling:
- Does your role as a caregiver negatively impact other areas of your life?
- Do you regularly feel overwhelmed and exhausted?
- Have the meaningful relationships you have become compromised because of caregiver stress?
Many caregivers are reluctant to ask for help of any kind, especially therapy. This level of dysfunction makes it extremely challenging for caregivers to do what they need to get you back to where they want to be without professional help. You know yourself best – if you’re wondering if it’s time to start therapy, it probably is.
How Is Caregiver Burnout Treated?
The most successful caregivers recognize that they cannot do it all alone.
Building a Support Network
They spend time building a support network so that if help is needed they don’t have to react in crisis mode. There are many respite care options available to you when you do seek hands-on caregiving help. Start with family members, neighbors, and friends. Places of worship often have volunteers. Identify skill sets and people able and willing to help. Investigate in-home health care agencies, adult day care, and senior care programs. These are rich resources for local information.
Utilizing Relationships With Other Caregivers
Caregiver support groups, chat rooms, and caregiver blogs are important resources. Many people take comfort in talking with others who are in a similar situation. It helps normalize your feelings and makes you feel less alone. Valuable insights and tips can be gained by these connections and relationships. Many caregiver organizations offer websites with excellent information. It is also great to go to a trusted friend or family member that you can speak candidly to about what you are experiencing.
Talking With a Therapist
Another excellent resource is reaching out to a family counselor or therapist. Their guidance can be crucial in helping you find ways to take care of yourself as you care for others, especially when they have direct experience working with caregivers.3 If you’re ready to find a therapist, you can ask your primary care provider for a referral, or use an online therapist directory where you can sort by specialty and insurance coverage.
9 Ways to Cope With Caregiver Burnout
The good news for caregivers who experience burnout is that there are many options available to help you cope if help is needed. The most important step is to acknowledge that you need help and then be willing to ask for it. If you help yourself reduce stress and recover from burnout, it will make you a better caregiver.
Stabilizing your emotions and overall health should be your goal. It can ultimately enrich your experience as a caregiver. Getting this additional support can enhance your relationship with the person you are caring for as well as other meaningful relationships in your life.
Here are some key ways to cope when experiencing caregiver burnout:4
- Talk to your doctor: You are not alone. Talk to your doctor about what you are experiencing, they may be able to help you address any medical problems that might be affecting your energy or mood, or provide a referral to a mental health professional.
- Make sure you have enough alone time: Time alone to unwind and decompress is not optional, it’s necessary for your mental health and will make you better equipped as a caregiver.
- Ask for (and accept) help: You can’t do it alone. Make a list of everyone who offers to help and take them up on it. Some ideas for what they can help with include providing meals, sitting with your loved one while you take a break, running errands, or helping with chores.
- Set up a regular check-in point with a trusted friend: A regular check in can be an anchor as you navigate through this difficult time. Set a standing date and check in.
- Find local resources: Seek out local resources not only for your loved one, but for yourself as well. These can include organizations for specific conditions, respite, or home health resources.
- Join a support group: Sometimes the best medicine is talking with people who know exactly what you are going through. A support group can provide not only support but helpful resources and tools you may not have thought of.
- Remember your role outside of caregiving: Remember that you are still you and you still have an identity outside of caregiving. Be sure to engage in things you enjoy.
- Be willing to relinquish some control: Sometimes you just have to turn it over and let someone else make the decisions.
- Talk to a therapist: A therapist can help you navigate the tough thoughts and feelings that are bound to come up, as well as help you build healthy coping skills and take care of yourself.
Get support before you burn out!
BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $60 per week. Take a Free Online Assessment and get matched with the right therapist for you.
Where to Turn to for Outside Help
There is no shame in asking for help, in fact sometimes it is the best way to be the best caregiver you can be for your loved one. Start building a support network so you don’t have to do this alone.
Here are some ideas for where to get outside support for caregiving:
- Home health services: A home health aide can come to the home and provide routine health care and sometimes even light household duties.
- Adult day care: Having your loved one go to an adult day care can give them a change of pace, new activities, and socialization while providing you with a break.
- Nursing homes or assisted living facilities: In some cases, it may be time to consider whether a higher level of care is the next right choice. While this is an extremely difficult decision to make, it might be the best choice for your loved one and yourself.
- Private care aides: Private care aides can provide more intensive home support than home health aides and can help with your loved ones care and provide companionship.
- Caregiver support services: Resources are also available for caregivers, including support groups and respite services that allow you to take a break while a trained provider stays with your loved one.
- Agency of aging: Your local agency on aging can be a great resource for many programs that are available in your area.
- National organizations: There are national organizations for aging and many specific health conditions that may be able to link you with resources or even financial assistance.
How to Support a Loved One Who is a Caregiver Experiencing Burnout
It is difficult to watch someone you care about become overwhelmed and incapacitated in their caregiver role. There are many things that you can do to help, including:
Just Listen to Them
Something that appears simple but is quite significant is to be able to listen. Just having someone you trust who takes the time to focus on you means a lot. Let them know their efforts are appreciated.
Help Them Identify Where You Can Pitch In
Asking caregivers what you can do to help also is extremely important. It can help them identify tasks that can be done to help alleviate their stress. The gift of your time is priceless to a caregiver. Encourage the caregiver to use time for themselves.
Learn About the Condition of the Person Needing Care
Educating yourself about the medical condition of the person being cared for can be helpful. It will help you understand if the caregiver’s expectations and efforts are realistic. You can use this information to help them prepare for what is to come or what more is needed. Caregivers often feel alone or abandoned. Your promise to check in and stay in contact in designated ways and times can be a lifeline to a caregiver.
Help Gather Important Resources
If you are able to gather caregiver support resources and information that may be of use to the caregiver. Ask if you can share this with them. If they are not ready to receive the information at that moment, hang onto it. It may be welcomed at a future date.
Don’t Criticize Them
It is common for caregivers to have conflicts with family or friends who disagree with how they are doing their caregiving. It can result in angry, stressful moments. Relationships can be severely damaged. Do not make judgmental statements. Try not to criticize the caregiver’s efforts. If you are unable or unwilling to offer any hands-on care don’t offer to help in ways you can’t. It will cause additional resentment and divisiveness if you do not follow through with expected promises to help the caregiver. Perhaps you can assist in other ways for example like financial support or bringing meals.
Additional Resources
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For Further Reading
- Family Caregiver Alliance: Provides education, public policy information, caregiver support programs, and connects caregivers.
- They also offer a site called Family Care Navigator. It is state-by-state information on services for people living at home, needing new living arrangements, legal help, and information on government health and disability programs.
- Caregiver Action Network: Their mission is to offer medical information and support to caregivers working with people with a variety of serious medical conditions. They offer education, practical local information, and resources. They also help reduce emotional and financial stress of caregivers.
- National Alliance for Caregiving: They provide information on caregiver policy, advocacy, research, resources, and a caregiver toolkit.
- Caregiver Action Network: They connect caregivers, caregivers share their stories, caregiver videos, caregiver toolkits, and multiple resources.
- Best Books on Burnout & Recovery
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