What Does Depression Feel Like?

What Does Depression Feel Like?

Depression can feel different for everyone, but there’s often a sense of apathy and numbness associated with it. Getting out of bed or completing basic tasks can feel like an immense chore. Some people feel like they are just moving through their days and “going through the motions” without any positive feelings attached to their routines.

Situational depression can occur after a specific incident, like a breakup, death, or important life change. In this case, depression symptoms correspond with that event and generally reduce with time. Chronic depression, however, is more general and is not attached to a particular circumstance. It can persist even despite positive life changes.

Depression may feel like:

• There is no pleasure or joy in the world: It can seem like you’re just doing what needs to be done, but nothing feels good. You may be productive, but things start feeling meaningless or insignificant.
• Everything is your fault: You may feel excessively guilty for how you feel or how you believe you have affected others. You might assume you’re a bad person who won’t ever change.
• Escape is the only hope: You may feel like you need certain vices like drugs, alcohol, food, or shopping to cope with your intense feelings. Even if you recognize such behaviors as self-destructive, numbing can still provide a sense of relief.
• Everything is a chore: It can seem like things are difficult or tedious to do. Depression can make you feel like you can’t get out of bed. You may lack the energy or motivation to complete your most important tasks.
• Everything feels hopeless, like there is no way out: This persistent thought can lead to suicidal ideation. You may believe that life won’t ever get better.
• You are hyper-functioning: Some people want to prove to themselves and others that they are okay. They may busy themselves with work, school, or other activities to try to avoid being with their feelings.
• Everything is irritating or upsetting: Irritability is often a sign of depression, and might look like snapping at your friends or family, getting annoyed about little things, and being quick to get angry.
• It’s hard to concentrate on work or school: Brain fog can lead to difficulty sustaining attention to a task, and can also affect memory.
• You may be sleeping too much, or not enough: Some people have trouble getting out of bed and oversleep, while others toss and turn and find that they are unable to sleep when dealing with depression.
• Your energy levels are consistently low: Lethargy often accompanies depression, and many people feel like they don’t have the energy to do the things they used to enjoy.
• You no longer know what you even like to do: Hobbies and interests go by the wayside and nothing feels motivating or interesting.
• Your eating patterns change: While some people might eat more when they are feeling depressed, others might experience a decrease in appetite and find it difficult to eat.
• You frequently cry without much of a reason: Some people experience feeling tearful without knowing why, and might cry without a known trigger.
• You may have bodily aches and pains: Somatic symptoms might include headaches, back pain, joint and muscle pain that are medically unexplained.

What Is the Difference Between How Depression & Sadness Feel?

Sadness is an emotion that generally has a defined cause. It’s often a response to real or perceived loss.¹ You may feel sad about a friend moving away or your dog getting sick. Depression is more than a transient emotion. However, if the sadness persists and affects how you function in everyday life, it may indicate underlying depression.

How People With Depression Would Describe the Feeling

People often describe depression as a sense of emptiness or disconnection. They sometimes feel like they’re drowning even if they have all the support and resources to succeed. Other times, they feel entirely numb and unable to access any real emotions. Depression can feel like carrying a heavy weight on your back that causes constant fatigue and discomfort.

Signs & Symptoms of Depression

Some people exhibit significant behavioral changes when they experience depression. Their attitude, hygiene, and general appearance may change. Others may not make many outward changes, even though they are silently struggling, which is a type of depression sometimes called smiling depression. It’s important for individuals and their loved ones to know what depression ‘looks like,’ even though symptoms can be different for everyone.

Common signs and symptoms of depression are:

• Excessive fatigue: People with depression often feel tired throughout the day. This low energy can persist even if they get enough sleep.
• Appetite changes: People may lose their appetites or have a stronger appetite than normal. These fluctuations can also cause weight changes.
• Withdrawing from loved ones: Depression can cause people to want to isolate. Even if they have close support, they may feel emotionally distant from their loved ones.
• Increased substance use: Some people self-medicate their depression symptoms via drugs or alcohol. This may numb some of the emotional pain.
• Lack of motivation: It can be hard to feel motivated to complete goals or basic tasks. Some people find themselves feeling stagnant as a result.
• Self-harm: People sometimes self-harm due to depression symptoms. This can be a form of punishment, a way to cope with intense emotions, or intended to release pain.⁴
• Changes in physical appearance: Depression sometimes affects personal hygiene and grooming. Some people may look different during depressive episodes.

How Depression Can Make Daily Life Challenging

Depression can affect energy levels, concentration, appetite, and sleep, all of which can significantly impact daily life. Living with depression can sometimes feel like there’s a dark cloud over everything, and even positive moments feel difficult to enjoy. It may also be challenging to understand the intense emotions or talk about what’s going on with others.

Does Everyone Experience the Same Depression Symptoms?

Not everyone with depression will experience the same set of symptoms. Symptoms of depression are many and vary widely from person to person. They can also differ in terms of severity, duration, frequency, and intensity. In fact, two thirds of people presenting with depression in primary care complain solely of somatic symptoms, like fatigue, insomnia, or weight changes.⁵ Depression is a very personal experience, and sadness is not the only symptom. Talking to a doctor or licensed therapist about any symptoms of depression you might be experiencing can help you to arrive at the most accurate diagnosis.

Do Men & Women Experience Depression Differently?

Women are twice as likely to be diagnosed with depression than men. Researchers suggest that this gender gap could be due, in part, to the hormonal shifts that women experience throughout their lifespan, including during pregnancy, postpartum, and menopause, in addition to societal factors, like unequal power and status.⁶ While women are more likely to present with intense sadness and crying, men tend to explode in anger when dealing with depression. Men are more likely to commit suicide, while women are more likely to seek help than men.⁷

Does Untreated Vs. Treated Depression Feel Different?

Untreated depression can result in serious emotional dysregulation. People may feel like they’re entirely alone in how they feel. There may be immense shame or worries about burdening others with their emotional needs. People may not know what to do with their symptoms, which can exacerbate low self-esteem and lead to more self-destruction.

Treated depression doesn’t mean all the symptoms disappear. In fact, some people feel worse in the initial stages of seeking treatment. That’s because insight can, at times, be painful, and making changes can feel extraordinarily difficult. Treatment, however, can provide a sense of hope, reassurance, and guidance; it offers a roadmap for healing.

What Are the Different Types of Depression?

The DSM lists several different types of depressive disorders.² In addition, many mental health experts agree that there are sub-types of depression that aren’t clinically diagnosable. It is possible to have one depressive disorder at one point in your life and then meet the criteria for another condition. All types of depression range in severity.

Types of depression include:

• Major depressive disorder: This type of depression refers to having several depression symptoms throughout a two-week period. Major depressive disorder is one of the most common types of depression.
• Persistent depressive disorder: Persistent depressive disorder symptoms are milder than those of major depressive disorder, but they last for at least two years.  The main symptoms include fatigue, appetite problems, and low self-esteem.
• Premenstrual dysphoric disorder: This depression is specific to one’s menstrual cycle. Premenstrual dysphoric disorder depression symptoms emerge just before or during one’s period and then improve quickly afterward.
• Postpartum depression: Postpartum depression refers to depressive symptoms occurring after the birth of a baby. Both mothers and fathers can experience this depression.
• Seasonal depression: Seasonal affective disorder (SAD) refers to seasonal patterns of depressive symptoms. Most people experience the symptoms during the winter months, but it’s also possible to have it during summer.
• Atypical depression: People with atypical depression have different depression symptoms, including mood reactivity, enhanced rejection sensitivity, and increased appetite.³ This type of depression can sometimes fall under the radar during clinical assessments.
• Psychotic depression: Psychotic depression refers to experiencing psychotic symptoms in conjunction with depression symptoms. It’s important to note that the psychotic symptoms only occur with the depression.
• Situational depression: Situational depression occurs in response to a specific event. Symptoms may fall under the criteria of an adjustment disorder diagnosis.

Do the Different Types of Depression Feel Different?

Every personal experience with depression is different. However, there tend to be common themes of persistent sadness, apathy, frustration, guilt, and fatigue. The symptoms of a major depressive episode are clinically universal, and this criteria is used to establish accurate diagnoses. More severe forms of depression can pose significant challenges to everyday functioning and be particularly debilitating.

When to See a Doctor If You Have Depressive Symptoms

If you’re experiencing any number of depressive symptoms for more than two weeks, it is important to bring these changes to the attention of your doctor. Typically, when symptoms become persistent, and impact your ability to function in daily life, or otherwise reduce your quality of life, then it is important to seek help. This might look like challenges with work performance, maintaining relationships, or taking care of yourself. If you’re in crisis, or acute distress, always seek support immediately.

How Is Depression Diagnosed?

After ruling out possible medical reasons for your symptoms, a physician or therapist will conduct a mental health assessment to learn more about your symptoms, thoughts, and patterns of behavior. This process might include a written questionnaire, as well as a conversational interview. Using the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) published by the American Psychiatric Association, the clinician will determine if your symptoms meet criteria for a depression diagnosis.

Treatments for Depression

Therapy is an important treatment for depression, often used in conjunction with medication and other approaches. Research has shown cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and interpersonal therapy (IPT) are most effective in treating depression.⁸ When it comes to psychopharmacological interventions, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) remain the gold standard, and most often prescribed medication, though others are sometimes used depending on the individual patient. Lifestyle changes, including exercise, healthy eating, and sleep, also help mitigate the symptoms of depression. For those dealing with severe, treatment-resistant depression, sometimes more somatic interventions, like transcranial magnetic stimulation (TMS) are used.

When to Seek Professional Support

Depression can certainly be difficult to live with, but the right treatment can help. It may be worth seeking professional support if your symptoms don’t improve or continue worsening. It is important to work with a therapist who specializes in depression treatment. You can look through an online therapist directory to start your search or use an online therapy for depression platform.