12 Things to Do If You’re Feeling Worthless

Why Do I Feel Worthless?

Feeling worthless can stem from different places—past experiences, negative self-talk, or even underlying mental health. When these feelings take hold, they can make everything seem harder, cloud our judgment, and impact our mental health. But understanding why these feelings arise is the first step toward challenging and changing them.

Here are some reasons you may be feeling worthless:

Difficult Life Stage

Anytime there’s a significant shift in your daily life or routine, feelings of worthlessness can start to creep in. These shifts might come in the form of losing a job, retiring, going through a breakup or divorce, or even experiencing empty nest syndrome. Changes like these can create a sense of loss, particularly if your role or sense of importance in the lives of others is affected.

When you no longer feel needed or valued at work, in a relationship, or at home, it can bring about a loss of purpose. For many, self-worth is closely tied to how much they feel they matter to others, and when that changes, feelings of worthlessness often follow.

Depression

Feelings of worthlessness are a hallmark symptom of depression. It usually comes hand in hand with low self-esteem, low self-worth, negative self-talk, and negative core beliefs about yourself, other people, and the world. When you’re stuck in this cycle, all these thoughts and emotions can pile up, leading to that heavy, all-encompassing feeling of worthlessness during a depressive episode.

Here are some types of depression that can make you experience feelings of worthlessness:

• Postpartum depression
• Major depressive disorder
• Situational depression
• Bipolar disorder depression
• Depression related to traumatic events
• Grief and loss

Unrealistic Expectations & Perfectionism

Common side effects of perfectionism and high expectations for self are lowered self-esteem and, inevitably, feelings of worthlessness. When you are constantly holding yourself (and others) to expectations that are unrealistic, you are generally never going to meet them with ease or possibly at all. If you are consistently experiencing disappointment in yourself from never being perfect, feelings of worthlessness are a natural consequence.

Recent or Childhood Trauma

Trauma can deeply affect how you see yourself and your sense of self-worth. Your brain often tries to make sense of the trauma by searching for reasons why it happened. In doing so, you might unknowingly turn inward, thinking, “Maybe it’s because I’m not good enough” or “I deserved it in some way.” This is a way for your mind to try to regain a sense of control – if you can find a reason, it feels less random and terrifying. Unfortunately, this can lead to a feeling of worthlessness, where you see yourself as fundamentally flawed or not deserving of care and safety.

Childhood trauma—like physical, emotional, psychological, or sexual abuse—often plays a big role in developing these feelings. As children, we’re more likely to absorb negative beliefs about ourselves, especially when they come from people we trust or look up to. Being so open and impressionable can make it easier to be manipulated or mistreated, setting the stage for a lifelong struggle with low self-worth.

Other Mental Health Problems

Feelings of worthlessness are an extremely common symptom among many mental health concerns. Substance use disorders, eating disorders, anxiety disorders, and trauma disorders can all lead to chronic feelings of worthlessness. These feelings are generally a result of low self-esteem and low self-worth, both of which can occur when physiological changes are present due to internal and external components of mental health disorders.

Toxic Relationships

When you have a history of toxic relationships, it can be really hard not to feel worthless. Growing up with toxic parents or being around people who constantly put you down can deeply affect how you see yourself, your ability to make decisions and even your sense of value as a person. If this becomes a pattern in your life, it’s easy to start believing that all those negative feelings are just facts about who you are.

Comparison to Others

Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” When we are constantly comparing ourselves to others, we can fall into the trap of never feeling good enough. With the prevalence and consistent use of social media, our ability to compare ourselves to others—who often aren’t representing themselves realistically—is easier than ever, making your feelings of worthlessness available at the press of a button.

Lack of Purpose

A lack of purpose can lead to low self-esteem because it often creates a feeling of being stuck or unfulfilled. You might start doubting your abilities or feel like you’re wasting your potential. When you don’t see yourself working towards something meaningful, it’s easy to fall into negative thinking patterns, like believing you’re not capable or that you’re failing in some way. Over time, these thoughts can wear down your confidence and lead to feelings of worthlessness.

How to Stop Feeling Worthless

Fortunately, there are ways to support yourself and reduce these feelings of worthlessness so you can have a more compassionate inner monologue. If you feel worthless, try exercising your body and mind. Other coping methods include being creative, getting out into nature, and talking to a therapist. At the end of this section, we’ve included worksheets to help you stop feeling worthless.

Here are twelve tips for what to do when you’re feeling worthless:

1. Practice Self-Compassion & Speak Kindly to Yourself

Feeling less worthless starts with you and how you treat and speak to yourself. Increasing your awareness of how you speak to yourself and engaging in self-care of all types is the first step in healing feelings of worthlessness. By intentionally practicing self-love and integrating positive self-talk, you can make large strides in improving your mental well-being. There are also many therapeutic ways you can practice self-compassion. Try nurturing your inner child, practicing loving-kindness meditations, engaging in gentle physical activity, and using positive affirmations.

2. Pay Attention to What Triggers Your Worthless Feelings

Certain types of people, situations, or internal states can trigger worthlessness. For example, if you have a difficult relationship with your parents, you might leave their house feeling negative about yourself. Or, if you feel like an imposter at work, you might notice that’s when worthlessness emerges the most. The goal isn’t always to avoid your triggers, but it’s important to be aware of them so you can start figuring out some healthy problem-focused coping skills.

3. Challenge Negative Self-Talk

Negative self-talk is fuel to the fire of feelings of worthlessness. You can easily get stuck in a loop of feeling worthless and your negative self-talk perpetuating these beliefs. By challenging negative self-talk, you can start to take some internal control of your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Start by developing awareness of when and how this self-talk is triggered and notice any patterns that are present. Challenging these thoughts can be as simple as saying the opposite to yourself in your mind or out loud, like “I am worthy of …” whatever you may be struggling with at the time.

4. Set Achievable Goals

To combat feelings of self-doubt and inadequacy, it’s important to focus on setting realistic goals. By setting and achieving these goals, you will improve your self-confidence, which combat feelings of worthlessness. Remember to celebrate your progress, no matter how small. Each accomplishment, big or small, is a step in the right direction toward overcoming self-doubt and building a stronger sense of self-worth.

5. Engage in Activities You Enjoy

Focusing on hobbies and activities that you love can boost your mood and self-esteem. When you focus on activities that bring you joy, you’re more likely to feel good about yourself and your abilities. Feeling more confident and capable are two experiences that directly challenge your feelings of worthlessness, making it difficult to maintain this negative self-perception.

6. Take a Social Media Break

Your feelings of worthlessness can often be triggered by the constant comparison to others who are available on social media. Taking a social media break can take away instant access to others’ lifestyles and shared achievements and bring you back to reality. Focusing on your real life and the people in it will help reset your expectations of yourself.

7. Talk to Someone You Trust

It is important not to isolate yourself when you’re feeling worthless. Humans are social creatures, and we rely on connection and safety to feel supported in this world. Talk to friends and family or join a support group. Even though validating yourself matters, being surrounded by kind people who care about your well-being can help you develop a greater sense of worth.

8. Do Something Kind for Someone Else

Prosocial behavior helps the world at large, and it can help you feel better about yourself. Small acts of kindness can help you feel grateful and develop a deeper sense of purpose. They also take you out of your own head and focus your attention on someone else, which can be a welcome change if you feel consumed by negative self-talk.

9. Practice Mindfulness

Mindfulness can help overcome feelings of worthlessness by allowing you to slow down and process emotions differently.² These practices encourage self-awareness and acceptance of things as they are. By being present in the moment and observing your thoughts and feelings without judgment, you can begin to untangle yourself from negative self-beliefs and cultivate a more compassionate self-image.

10. Keep a Journal of Positive Feedback

When we feel worthless, we tend to notice the things that make us feel even more worthless. Keeping a journal of all the positive feedback you get throughout your week can help you shift your focus to the good things people say about you and your accomplishments. When feelings of worthlessness strike, you can turn to your journal for concrete evidence that contradicts those negative thoughts. Seeing written compliments and recognition of your efforts can be a powerful reminder of your value.

11. Stay Physically Active (Preferably in Nature)

A lot of research suggests that exercise boosts mental health by increasing feel-good hormones in the brain. This can counteract feelings of worthlessness and any other negative emotions or thoughts you struggle with. Exercising while in nature is particularly beneficial for your mental health, reducing feelings of anxiety, depression, stress, and other mental health issues.

12. Talk to a Therapist

Most people experience feelings of insecurity or inadequacy from time to time, but truly feeling worthless can coincide with numerous other issues, including relationship problems, compulsive behavior, a sense of stagnation, and even crisis responses (like self-harm or suicidal ideation). If any of this resonates with you, it may be helpful to seek professional support.

Getting objective feedback and guidance from a professional is always going to be helpful in addressing any emotional distress you may be facing. Healing takes time, and having someone objective on your team may be what you need to change your inner critic’s voice.³

Worksheets for Increasing Self-Love

This collection of worksheets is designed to guide you in cultivating self-love by focusing on areas like self-care, gratitude, cognitive restructuring, and recognizing personal strengths. Find the one right for you or download them all here.

Self-Care Inventory Download

Challenging Negative Self-Talk Download

Personal Strengths Inventory Download

Identifying Your Triggers Download

Practicing Gratitude Download

How to Find Professional Support

A local therapist directory is a great way to find a therapist in your area who takes your insurance. Alternatively, online therapy services can match you with a therapist specializing in challenging negative self-talk and developing a healthier relationship with oneself. Online-Therapy.com is a service tailor-made for cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which is especially effective at combating negative self-talk and feelings of worthlessness. If you want to explore medication options, there are many online psychiatry services that offer medication management and consultations, making it easier to access the support you need without having to travel.