What to Do When You’re Feeling Worthless: 12 Tips From a Therapist

Why Do I Feel Worthless?

Many factors contribute to feelings of worthlessness. These feelings may come from the way you were raised, childhood trauma, past experiences, or underlying mental health concerns.

Common reasons people feel worthless include:

• Childhood trauma: Trauma can fundamentally impact self-worth and self-esteem, which can cause feelings of worthlessness that prevail long after the event happened.
• A recent failure: Failing can trigger insecurity, which can challenge someone’s concept of self-worth.
• Constant criticism: Being criticized, especially if it’s by a caregiver or romantic partner, can take a toll on someone’s self-worth. Over time, you may agree with their criticism, causing you to feel badly about yourself.
• Guilt about productivity: Certain cultures and workplaces have high productivity standards. Struggling or failing to meet those goals can trigger feelings of worthlessness.
• Seeing negative events as your fault: Personalizing adverse experiences may coincide with feelings of worthlessness.
• Difficulty with stress: Stress can cause people to turn their anger or sadness inward, which may contribute to worthlessness.
• Sign of a mental health problem: Worthlessness is a core symptom of depression, and it may also present in other conditions, including substance use disorders, PTSD, eating disorders, and anxiety disorders.

“It is extremely common to feel worthless—it is normal and you definitely aren’t alone,” says Charlotte Howard, Ph.D., Licensed Psychologist & Certified Group Psychotherapist. “However, it is only normal because so many people have repetitive painful experiences during childhood of not feeling good enough, or of being treated as though they don’t matter that much by their parents.”

When Feeling Worthless May Be a Sign of Depression

It’s possible that long-term feelings of worthlessness are linked with underlying mental health issues like depression. Feeling worthless is a common symptom of depression and other mood disorders. Accompanying symptoms may include withdrawal from usual activities, isolation, and feelings of hopelessness, shame, and guilt.

How to Stop Feeling Worthless

Fortunately, there are ways to support yourself and reduce these feelings of worthlessness so you can have a more compassionate inner monologue. If you feel worthless, try exercising your body and mind. Other ways to cope include being creative, getting out into nature, and talking to a therapist.

Here are 12 tips for what to do when you’re feeling worthless:

1. Practice Self-Compassion & Speak Kindly to Yourself

Dr. Howard suggests, “To stop feeling worthless you need to develop a healthy relationship with yourself the way you would anyone else. Relate to yourself with compassion first and foremost and see if you can feel that in your heart. You may have to imagine yourself as a child to get in touch with how innately worthy and valuable you are. It will take work, time, and repetition to be a loving presence for yourself the way your parents and others should have growing up, but you definitely can stop feeling worthless if you are willing to do that for yourself.”

2. Read About Others Who Have Overcome Challenges

When you internalize your feelings, it can be hard to distinguish between what’s real and what’s the result of prolonged negative feedback. Shame makes it hard to accept your own positive attributes, but reading books about overcoming adversity, even when it’s internal, can be empowering. When you experience stories other than your own, it’s validating. It can give you hope for something better.

3. Talk to Someone You Trust

We are social creatures, and we rely on connection and safety to feel supported in this world. Even though validating yourself matters, being surrounded by kind people who care about your well-being can help you cultivate a greater sense of worth. In addition, having permission to be vulnerable can be incredibly freeing, so sharing and getting positive feedback can help you internalize your inherent value.

4. Pay Attention to What Triggers Your Worthless Feelings

Certain types of people, situations, or internal states can trigger worthlessness. For example, if you have a difficult relationship with your parents, you might leave their house feeling negatively about yourself. Or, if you feel like an imposter at work, you might notice that’s when worthlessness emerges the most. The goal isn’t to always avoid your triggers, but it’s important to be aware of them so you can start figuring out some healthy problem-focused coping skills.

5. Meditate

Meditation when you’re feeling low can help you slow down, process emotions differently, and react in a way that helps your own personal cause. It can also help you be more mindful and remember to speak to yourself with kindness and grace, even on the hard days.²

6. Practice Mindfulness

Even beginners will find that mindfulness can teach you to embrace your inner voice and let it help guide you. Being mindful means being in the most conscious state of yourself. This is when you’re most self-aware and accepting.

7. Keep a Journal

Writing down your thoughts and reading them aloud can help you realize how you really feel. Journaling prompts focused on mental health can help you focus on identifying negative thought patterns and exploring where they come from and why.

8. Utilize Creative Outlets

Channeling emotions into art can be rewarding. Whether that art involves paint, music, or dance, it reminds you that there is beauty in all stories. It helps you see yourself through a different lens and recognize both the positive attributes and the imperfections. Creative therapies help you cultivate self-love and strength in the face of inner adversity.³

9. Nature Walks

There is a lot of research suggesting that spending time in nature helps reduce feelings of anxiety, depression, stress, and other mental health issues. Nature has a way of improving the mood. There is a strong connection between the time spent in nature and overall mental wellness.

10. Practice Yoga

Yoga lets people express emotions through their body. In general, there are many benefits to exercising, but yoga takes it further with a goal of finding balance. When finding balance and an emotional equilibrium are at the center of your mind, it’s easier to recognize your worth. You can easily start a yoga practice by using a yoga app with on-demand videos and poses.

11. Do Something Kind for Someone Else

Prosocial behavior helps the world at large, and it can help you feel better about yourself. Small acts of kindness are associated with gratitude and a deeper sense of purpose. They also take you out of your own head and focus your attention on someone else, which can be a welcome change if you feel consumed by negative self-talk.

12. Talk to a Therapist

Getting objective feedback and guidance from a professional is always going to be helpful to address any emotional distress you may be facing. Healing takes time, and having someone objective on your team may be exactly what you need to change your inner critic’s voice.⁴

When to Get Help for Feelings of Worthlessness

Most people experience feelings of insecurity or inadequacy from time to time, but truly feeling worthless can coincide with numerous other issues, including relationship problems, compulsive behavior, a sense of stagnation, and even crisis responses (like self-harm or suicidal ideation). If any of this resonates with you, it may be helpful to seek professional support.

Types of Therapy That Can Help When You’re Feeling Worthless

The best type of therapy modality for treating feelings of worthlessness depends on the individual.

If you’re considering therapy, you might start by exploring narrative therapy or CBT:

• Narrative therapy helps individuals own and take control of their story by using empowering language. It helps individuals remain the leader in their life and supports self-determination.⁵
• With cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), the therapist facilitates dialogue and engages you to identify negative thought patterns that impact your behavior and emotions. By getting to the root of the thought, this common form of therapy empowers you to reshape your experience.

How to Find a Therapist

One way to find a therapist is through word-of-mouth. Ask for recommendations from close friends and family members, but keep in mind, everyone is different. If, after talking to the recommended therapist, you don’t feel like they’re a match, don’t get discouraged. Try using an online therapist directory to locate someone in the right area with the appropriate expertise.

You can also ask your physician for recommendations. This sets them up to collaborate on treatment and potentially manage any medication. If you don’t have a primary care physician, locate a mental health provider from your in-network list of counselors. This information should be on the back of your insurance card. If not, call your insurance company about mental health coverage and get a list of in-network providers.

Final Thoughts on Feeling Worthless

Remember, if you feel worthless, you’re not alone; a lot of people feel this way. There are ways to move forward and live a happy life. If you need immediate help for suicidal ideation, call a friend or family member who you trust, the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255), or 9-1-1. If you can’t make a call, go to the nearest emergency room or inpatient psychiatric hospital.