How to Find an LGBTQIA+ Therapist

Why Finding a LGBTQIA+ or LGBTQIA+ Friendly Therapist Is So Important

Mental health disorders are much more prevalent for LGBTQIA+ individuals due to multiple factors, including discrimination in society, social stigma, lack of support, bi erasure, and internalized homophobia. In a study across the US it was found that 57% of all LGBTQ+ people have experienced slurs, 57% of those surveyed had themselves or had family members that were threatened or non-sexually harassed, and 51% have experienced violence because of their sexuality or gender identity.³ Alarming as these statistics may be, they show that LGBTQIA+ people are more likely to face experiences and traumas that lead to a greater likelihood of developing a mental health disorder.

In terms of the prevalence of mental health issues, research has shown that LGBTQIA+ folks are more likely to suffer from a mental health disorder compared to their heterosexual counterparts.³ LGBTQ+ people are at higher risk of suicide, especially for those members who identify as transgender: 81% of transgender adults reported thoughts of suicide and 48.3 % had tried to kill themselves in the past year.⁴

The Importance of Having a Similar Background

Research has shown that people with minority identities may prefer a therapist who understands their experience, like what it’s like to come out as gay, lesbian or bisexual to family and loved ones.² According to the American Psychological Association (APA) Practice Guidelines for Working with LGBTQ+ Clients, therapists must understand the social stigma, discrimination, and antigay victimization that can plague LGBTQ+ clients.

Guidelines state that psychologists must understand how stigma can affect LGBTQIA+ clients, recognize one’s own biases as they relate to the therapeutic work, and recognize there may be difficulties outside of being a member of the LGBTQ+ community.²

Where to Find a List of LGBTQ+ Therapists

LGBTQ+-friendly therapists can be found using online directories and specific apps as well as through traditional referral sources, like trusted family members, friends, or primary care physicians. Additionally, many national, state- and city-wide non-profit agencies that serve the LGBTQ+ community have therapist referral networks. A college or university’s student health center or LGBTQ+ student association can also be a great place for students to find a list of therapists. In most cases, accessing these directories is free.

National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network

The National Queer and Trans Therapists of Color Network is a network of Queer and Transgender identified therapists of color transforming mental health for Queer and Transgender People of Color (QTPoC). They have a directory where you can search on a map, or search by featured therapists in a certain area. Most therapists are primarily in larger, gay-friendly cities on the East and West Coast, and splattered through the Midwest and South. When you click on a potential therapist you will be able to view their contact information, fees, practice website, specialties, etc.

PrideCounseling

PrideCounseling is an online therapy platform that’s operated by BetterHelp. Therapists on PrideCounseling specialize in working with the LGBTQ+ community. Therapy sessions are done online and are completely confidential and HIPPA compliant. You provide your information regarding what kind of therapist you are looking for and they connect you with someone that meets your needs. Sessions are provided via video chat, phone, or live chat (like a chatroom). You can also message your therapist during the week when needing support. Pride Counseling costs $240 to $360 per month. No insurance is accepted.

Your City’s LGBTQ+ Center

LGBTcenters.org is a comprehensive list of LGBTQ+ centers in the US. This helps you easily locate the nearest center near you. Many LGBTQ+ centers have licensed therapists that you can see or know of resources in your area.

Lighthouse

Lighthouse connects you with LGBTQ+ friendly healthcare and wellness providers in your area. These can be therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, doctors, dentists, etc. When clicking on a potential therapist profile, the therapist will provide their identifier (Gay Cis Man), address and contact info, specialties, experiences, fees, if they accept insurance, and a short bio about them.

Other Places to Find a List of LGBTQ+ Therapists

While online therapist directories and non-profit organizations are a great place to find LGBTQ+ therapists, they aren’t the only options. Those employed by medium to large size companies should look into the options provided in their Employee Assistance Program (EAP). Students currently enrolled in college or university should check in with their campus health department or their student center. Another good option is to request a referral from your primary care physician or another trusted medical provider. And it’s worth considering tapping into your network of friends, colleagues, and family members if you have reason to believe they’ve dealt with a similar search before.

Choosing the Best Gay Friendly Therapist for Your Needs

Now that you have decided to take that leap to find a LGBTQ+-friendly therapist, it’s time to consider logistics. If you have insurance it may be cost effective to find a therapist that accepts your insurance, if possible. It’s also important to look at the license and education of the therapist to make sure you believe they have the qualifications to meet your needs as a client. In addition, you need to see if the therapist can accommodate your schedule.

Lastly, reading their website can give you an idea of what kind of personality they have and if you think you would vibe well with them. Research has shown that the most important indicator that a client will improve is the therapeutic relationship. Regardless of the therapeutic style, when there is a strong alliance between a client and therapist the client will be much more likely to see a reduction in mental health symptoms. This makes the importance of finding a therapist that you relate to the best factor for treatment.⁹ Reading their biography, specialties, and education with a critical eye will be beneficial when making the decision to move forward.

Knowing Your Goals for Therapy

Although finding an LGBTQ+ counselor can be a tedious process, thinking about your therapy goals ahead of time can make it less stressful. Take a moment to reflect on what you wish to get out of therapy. Consider what is most important to you, what areas in your life you want to address and how you envision your future afterwards. Even if it is not related to LGBTQ+ concerns, knowing your goals for treatment can help you determine what things to look for in a potential counselor (specialty, experience, therapeutic approach, etc.), thus getting you closer to finding a professional who will understand you and is best suited for your particular needs.

Accounting for Other Identity Factors You May Have

We’re all multifaceted individuals whose identity is shaped by a wide range of factors such as race, cultural background, religion, family of origin, age, having a disability, and so much more. These things can also play a distinct role in the experiences and challenges within the LGBTQ+ community. For example, you may feel that a counselor who is LGBTQ+ friendly and Black may provide greater support for you. Or you may find that other aspects of your identity take prevalence and would feel more in tune with a Latinx therapist. Perhaps you are dealing with a whole set of issues that warrant a professional with a specialty in treating trauma or have a specific therapeutic approach. Therefore, accounting for other identity factors may better guide you in your pursuit of a suitable mental health professional.¹⁰

Licensing, Certification, and Education

Finding an LGBTQ+ friendly therapist is the first step in making sure you have a great match. The next thing to look at is the therapist’s license and education. Depending on the severity of your needs you may want someone with more education, training, or specialization in addition to being LGBTQ+-friendly.

• Licensed Professional Counselors (LPC), also known as licensed clinical professional counselors (LCPC) or licensed mental health counselors (LMHC). These therapists work with family, individuals, couples, and group therapy. They complete around two years of education to obtain a Masters in Mental Health Counseling and complete 3,000 hours of supervised clinical experience under a licensed counselor. Lastly, they must pass the National Counselor Examination (NCE).⁵
• Social Workers receive a Master of Social Work (MSW) after completing around two years of coursework. Similar to LPCs they do an internship in different clinical settings while taking classes. After receiving an MSW they must have two years of full-time clinical social work experience  (a minimum of 1,920 supervised hours of face-to-face client contact). Lastly, candidates must pass the Association of Social Work Boards (ASWB).⁶
• Psychologists primarily receive a Ph.D. (Doctorate of Philosophy) or Psy.D. (Doctorate of Psychology) in Clinical or Counseling Psychology. The doctorate degrees take an average of 4-7 years to complete. A PsyD is focused more on working in the clinical field with clients, while a PhD devotes more time to research. Most states require one year of supervised experience (under a licensed psychologist) before graduation and an additional year of postdoctoral experience (under a licensed psychologist). Lastly, psychologists must pass the Examination for Professional Practice in Psychology (EPPP).⁷

There is much debate about which mental health professional is “better.” Every professional goes through rigorous hours of training to hone their craft. Social Workers have been known to be more social justice and advocacy focused and the degree opens possibilities for administrative and nonprofit work, in addition to being a therapist. On the other hand, Psychologists many times have more research experience and may have greater specializations. Licensed Professional Counselors are primarily specialized in therapy (compared to the other two specialties discussed).

Costs and Insurance

The cost per therapy session will vary depending on the education, experience level, and specialty area of the therapist. Certain geographic areas can also impact the cost of therapy. For example, in New York City therapists may charge anywhere between $65-$350 per session while the average in most cities is between $100-$200.⁸

If a therapist you are interested in accepts your insurance then your out-of-pocket costs will be significantly lower. Your insurance will cover most of the session and you will; be responsible for just the copay, usually between $10-$40 a session depending on your insurance benefits. If your insurance has “out of network” benefits, then you would pay the full fee of the therapy session and your insurance would reimburse a percentage of that fee after. It is important to call your insurance ahead of time to see how much they cover for in network and out of network therapy.^{1, 3}

If you don’t have insurance or your preferred therapist isn’t in network, you may be able to find more affordable rates by looking for therapists that offer a sliding scale fee where your session fee amount is based on your income. If you see an intern or trainee (a future therapist completing their coursework and working under supervision of a licensed therapist) the costs will be much lower. Another option is to seek therapy through a community mental health center which often offers reduced costs.

Scheduling

It’s important to find a therapist who has open availability during your preferred time. Oftentimes the clinician’s general hours of operation are listed on their website, but you will typically not know their current availability. To get that information, you’ll need to give them a call or inquire via email.

When making your first phone call or email inquiry to the potential therapist to discuss briefly what you are struggling with, your goal of finding an LGBTQ+ friendly therapist and your time and date availability.

Example Email Enquiry to a Therapist

“Hi my name is _________ , I am looking for a therapist to help with issues of depression and who has experience with LGBTQ+ populations. I am available for therapy _____________(Days of Week) between _____________ (Time of Day). The best phone number to reach me at is _____________ and the best email address to reach me at is _____________.”

This gives the therapist a good idea of what you are looking for and your availability from the start so they can see if their schedule can accommodate you.

The importance of choosing a session during a time when you have the least commitments is key. When choosing a therapist to work with you never want to bend your schedule to the therapist’s availability. This will create problems in the future if you have to continue juggling commitments and can’t give proper time to your treatment. A good rule of thumb when scheduling a session is to make sure you have plenty of time to get to your appointment and some time to reflect afterwards. The less likely you are to miss a session the better your treatment will be. If you continually need to cancel then this will affect your outcomes. Your time is valuable and you must treat it as such.

Finding the RIGHT Therapist

Finding a good therapist can be like finding a good partner. You might go on a lot of first “dates” to see which one you vibe with the most, and which person you connect with. This is your opportunity to see if the therapist has the right skills, personality, and therapeutic style that you will find helpful. Everyone is unique and not all therapists will be your cup of tea, and that’s ok!

What About Group Therapy?

Psychotherapy delivered in a group setting can be a powerful source of encouragement and support for people struggling with a variety of concerns, and assist them in finding community with others going through similar challenges. Group therapy can be highly effective in addressing the varying issues within the LGBTQ+ population as well as fostering a sense of hope, belonging, empowerment, self-efficacy, and resilience.^11,12

Group therapy should be facilitated by an affirming professional who understands the scope of the mental health needs, changing socio-political trends, and other minority-related stressors faced by LGBTQ+ clients. It is best practice that an LGBTQ+ person is placed in a group with other LGBTQ+ members. In most cases, an LGBTQ+ client may be better served from a particular type of group or one addressing a pertinent concern, such as “coming out,”^11,12

Doing a Phone Interview First

When you are able to schedule an in-person or phone consultation you can use a more critical lens to see if you think this therapist is a good fit. You may prefer an active therapist who challenges you or a therapist who listens and reflects. A good rule of thumb is to arrange meetings with multiple therapists. Usually the first phone call and consultation are free.

When meeting for the first time, don’t be afraid to ask more about their experiences working with the LGBTQ+ population. Whether they self-disclose or identify as an ally, you should get a good feel what their experience has been, if they have taken any specialized training or certifications in working with the LGBTQ+ community, and their approach to working with this community. If they have the right life experience it will be evident in their mindset and approach to counseling LGBTQ+ individuals.

Questions to Ask Potential LGBTQ+ Friendly Therapists

Don’t be afraid to ask the hard questions because this will be someone you may be working with over time and you want to gather as much pertinent information as you can.

Here are ten questions that can might elicit useful insights into your potential patient-therapist fit:

1. What experience do you have with the LGBTQ+ community?
2. Do you have any specific training or certifications that correspond to working with LGBTQ+ clients?
3. What is your therapeutic orientation and how does this inform your practice?
4. What are your specialties?
5. Do you feel confident in working with me?
6. What is your availability and do you provide evenings or weekend appointments?
7. What is your cancellation policy if I cannot make a session?
8. How long do you think therapy will take?
9. Do you allow client feedback throughout therapy, and what does that look like?
10. How will we know when therapy is finished?

Finding an LGBTQ+ Friendly Psychiatrist

Much like finding an LGBTQ+ therapist, the process of looking for an LGBTQ+ friendly psychiatrist may be similar and entail some legwork. In your pursuit for a suitable psychiatrist specializing in the LGBTQ+ population, make sure that you gather your referrals from reliable and trustworthy people and sources. This may include searching online engines, directories, or forums, asking your PCP or your LGBTQ+ therapist (if you already have one) for referrals, or reaching out to LGBTQ+ agencies or organizations in your community.

Once you have a list of at least two potential LGBTQ+ psychiatrists, think about what’s most relevant to you in terms of the type of treatment you’re looking for, their professional experience, their views about the LGBTQ+ community, your schedule, and your budget. Being clear about these areas can help you narrow down your options and perhaps save you time and money. When you reach out to the psychiatrist or their office, ask any of the questions listed below that apply to you, either in person, on the phone, or via email. Remember, this is an important decision so it’s okay to ask as many questions as you deem necessary.

Some sample questions may include:

Psychiatrist and Practice:

• What training or professional experience do you have related to the mental health of the LGBTQ+ community?
• How long have you been treating LGBTQ+ patients?
• What’s your position on so-called “conversion therapy”—attempts to change a person’s sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender expression?
• Are you and your staff fully competent to provide affirmative care and remain up-to-date with current LQBTQ+ issues?

Treatment:

• How do you involve me in decision making and other aspects of my treatment?
• What can I expect from treatment?
• Do you only prescribe medication, or do you provide talk therapy as well?
• How long will I be in treatment?
• Tell me about confidentiality (Will you need to share my information with anyone else, like my doctor?)

Payment Questions:

• Do you accept my insurance?
• How much do you charge per visit?
• Do you require payment at the time of the appointment?
• What is your cancellation policy?

Availability:

• What are your hours?
• Do you have early/late/convenient hours available?
• Do you offer virtual visits?
• Could I reach you after hours if I have a crisis?
• Do you offer virtual visits?

What If I Need Help Immediately?

If you’re in imminent danger or thinking of hurting yourself or others, don’t wait—seek help right away. You can also call 911 or a local emergency number or go to your nearest emergency room. Additionally, there are many resources available that can connect you with trained counselors who are ready to listen, provide support and eager to assist. Remember you are not alone.

Don’t hesitate to contact the following crisis lines in an emergency:

• The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline call or text 988
• LGBT National Hotline offers text and email support at 888-843-4564
• LGBT National Senior Hotline 888-234-7243
• LGBT Youth National Talkline at 800-246-7743
• The Trevor Project Crisis Support connects you to a counselor 24/7 via chat, call or text
• National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233 or text START to 88788 to talk to a counselor 24/7
• The Trans Lifeline to speak to a trans/nonbinary peer operator at 877-565-8860 (US) or 877-330-6366 (Canada)
• If you’re a young person of color, text STEVE to 741741 to reach a counselor 24/7
• The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) Helpline at 800-662-4357 offering 24/7 assistance.

Lastly, if you are unable to cope with your distress alone, contact a trusted family member or close friend. If this occurs to you frequently, plan ahead and make a list of people willing to help including their phone numbers, or have them on speed dial.

Finding a Great LGBTQIA+ Therapist Is Worth It

Although the process of finding the right therapist can seem daunting, it ultimately will benefit you in the long run. Taking the time to find a therapist that understands what you are going through and can help you with your most pressing mental health concerns will ensure long term success. Think of this as investing in your future, because you deserve it.

We all deserve help, especially during this hard time. As a gay identified therapist who also sees a gay therapist, I can tell you that finding him was the best thing that could have ever happened to me. I have someone who understands my feelings towards my sexuality, understands my struggles as a gay person, and can help me feel whole again.