Hypersexuality is defined by the American Psychological Association as, “extreme frequency of sexual activity, or an inordinate desire for sexual activity.”1 Many different terms have been used to describe it over the years, such as nymphomania, satyriasis, erotomania, and hyperphilia. In more recent years, it’s typically referred to and used interchangeably with the terms sexual compulsivity, sexual addiction, and/or excessive sexual drive.
What Is Hypersexuality?
Hypersexuality is often described as an extreme urge or desire to engage in sexual activity. It is a sexual disorder that impacts 3-6 % of the population and is also referred to as compulsive sexual behavior disorder (CSBD), hypersexuality disorder, or sex addiction.2 Having a diagnosis of hypersexuality includes an abnormally strong fixation on sex, which is all-consuming.
It may involve things like the use of porn, excessive masturbation, phone or cybersex, paying for sex, or consensual sexual activity with multiple partners. As a result, hypersexuality can have a tremendous impact on an individual’s quality of life, often leading to sexual frustration and creating problems at work, home, school, and in relationships.
Hypersexuality vs. High Sex Drive
High sex drive refers to a increase in sexual desire but one that can still be managed. It isn’t easy to define “normal,” or “high” because everyone has a different baseline. There may be concerns about a sex drive that’s “too high” when the sexual activity feels compulsive or out of control.3
Hypersexuality often cannot be controlled – thus the excessive use of porn, paying for sex, or multiple sexual partners in an unhealthy or unsafe way. It also usually impacts many aspects of an individual’s life – including their relationships, work, finances, etc.
Hypersexuality Symptoms
Compulsive sexual behavior can arise through a variety of different types of behaviors, but it tends to escalate over time. A main indicator of concern may be a high sex drive that suddenly feels out of control or if your sexual behavior is causing problems for you or someone else.
Hypersexuality symptoms may include the following:
- Intense sexual fantasies or thoughts that feel out of control
- A drive to engage in sexual behavior in order to release tension, but then a subsequent feeling of guilt or shame
- Unsuccessful attempts to control or change fantasies, urges, or sexual behaviors.
- Use of sexual behavior as a coping mechanism or as a way to numb feelings of depression, anxiety, loneliness, or stress.
- Engaging in risk-taking behavior; such as paying for sex, unprotected sex, sex with multiple partners, etc.
- Lying about or trying to hide the behavior
- Difficulty forming and maintaining healthy relationships
Hypersexuality in Men
Hypersexuality can impact men physically, emotionally, and relationally. Time spent satisfying sexual needs often takes away from other aspects of their life, which can lead to a variety of concerns.4
Hypersexuality in men may present with:
- Excessive masturbation
- Use of porn, phone, or cybersex
- Paying prostitutes or sex workers for sex or sexual favors
- Spending excessive time satisfying sexual needs and neglecting responsibilities at home or work
Female Hypersexuality Symptoms
There is minimal research available about hypersexuality in women because most of the documented studies have been conducted with men.5 Many women opt not to seek treatment due to shame. Those women diagnosed with hypersexuality notice an extreme interference in their daily activities such as family, social, and career development. They continue with the sexual behavior, even though they derive little satisfaction from it.5
Hypersexuality in women may present with:
- Excessive masturbation
- Use of porn
- Engagement in risky sexual encounters (according to the research, women, however, do fear pain and bodily harm more than men)5
What Causes Hypersexuality?
The causes of hypersexuality are unclear. To get a clearer picture, more research needs to be conducted with both male and female participants. It is known that certain risk factors could put individuals at a higher risk of developing hypersexuality, including addiction to alcohol or drugs, a family history of mental illness, and a history of childhood trauma.5
A review of the current literature provides the following factors that can cause hypersexuality:
- Medication side effects: A side effect of medications that are given to target dopamine and/or used to combat Parkinson’s have been found to increase hypersexuality6
- Medical conditions: It has been discovered that certain diseases, such as epilepsy, dementia, Alzheimer’s, and Huntington’s disease may cause damage to parts of the brain related to sexual behavior, which can lead to compulsive sexual behavior6
- Use as a coping skill: Hypersexuality can also be used as a mechanism to deal with past trauma. The individual can become compulsive about undoing the trauma, redoing it differently, or understanding it.7
- Disruption in neurotransmitters: Certain chemicals in your brain (serotonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine) help to regulate your mood. When high levels are found, this may be related to compulsive sexual behavior.3
Hypersexuality Treatments
If you or someone you know is struggling with hypersexuality, it’s important to seek out a professional for an evaluation to determine the best type of treatment. A doctor or mental health professional will perform a psychological evaluation and ask questions related to physical and mental health, sexual compulsions and urges, relationship history, and any problems or concerns related to sexual behavior.3
The primary forms of treatment for being hypersexual are psychotherapy, medication, and self-help groups. Working individually with a psychotherapist and doing talk therapy is a way that individuals are able to learn how to manage their compulsive sexual behavior. Look for a therapist who is specifically trained in sex therapy.
In addition, some other beneficial methods of therapy for addressing hypersexuality are:
- Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): Focuses on identifying negative and unhealthy beliefs and replacing them with new behaviors and skills
- Psychodynamic therapy: Focuses on increasing your awareness of unconscious thoughts and behaviors and developing new insights
To find a qualified therapist who is a good fit for your personal needs, refer to an online therapist online therapist directory where you can search through a variety of highly qualified mental health professionals .
How to Cope if You’re Hypersexual
Learning to cope with hypersexuality is a key aspect of wellness and the road to recovery. An important aspect of treatment is reducing compulsive behaviors (i.e. learning how to stop watching porn or how to stop masturbating).
Additional ways to deal with hypersexuality include:
1. Join a Support Group
A support group such as Sex Addicts Anonymous will offer support and hope through an environment of openness and acceptance.
2. Stick to Your Treatment Plan
Although it isn’t always easy, it is imperative to attend your scheduled therapy appointments, take medications as prescribed, and maintain consistency with your treatment. This is hard work, and it’s important to prepare for occasional setbacks on your road to getting well.
3. Learn Your Triggers & Motivators
Identify what thoughts, feelings, and situations tend to trigger sexually compulsive behavior in order to come up with a plan to manage them. This may look like avoiding or limiting triggering behaviors, and instead discovering things that are rewarding and motivating.
4. Get Treatment For Mental Health or Substance Abuse or Addictions
An untreated mental illness, substance abuse, or gambling addiction may perpetuate some of the same feelings experienced with hypersexuality. All of these issues pertain to concerns related to a cycle of intense feelings. Each can feed off of one another, which can make treatment more difficult.
5. Avoid Risky Behaviors
This will be different for each person, but may encompass avoiding strip clubs and bars or installing computer software to block pornographic websites. The goal is to make it more difficult to engage in compulsive behavior.
6. Find Healthy Coping Strategies
If you use sex to cope with negative feelings, start talking about that in therapy and learn some healthy coping strategies as a replacement. These can include exercise, cooking, sports, crafts, etc.
7. Practice Stress Reduction Techniques
Learning about relaxation, mindfulness, and stress reduction will help alleviate tension related to all of the changes in your life. Some specific things to try are yoga, meditation/breathwork, or tai chi.
8. Educate Yourself
Become an expert on hypersexuality and compulsive sexual behavior. This will help you become more knowledgeable about its causes and the treatment strategies available
Final Thoughts
Hypersexuality is difficult to deal with, but there are ways of coping. Recovery can take time, however, you can stay motivated by keeping your recovery goals in mind and reminding yourself that treatment and support are readily available.
For Further Reading
- Sex Addicts Anonymous
- Sexual Compulsives Anonymous
- S-Anon (support for family members)
Hypersexuality Infographics
