How to Stop Masturbating: 14 Tips

Although masturbation is normal and a healthy form of sexual expression, it can be done in excess—at which point it becomes unhealthy and problematic. Stopping or cutting down on masturbating requires commitment. Speaking with a professional is always recommended if you are concerned that your masturbation habits have become compulsive or problematic.

How to Stop Masturbating

Overcoming the urge to masturbate can feel challenging, but the good news is that there are many effective strategies to help you regain control. Different approaches work for different people, so it’s important to explore what resonates with you. The more strategies you incorporate into your plan, the higher your chances of reaching your goal and creating lasting, positive change.

Here are fourteen strategies that can help you to stop masturbating:

1. Talk About It With Your Romantic Partner or Others You Trust

Opening up about problematic masturbation can feel awkward, but talking to a romantic partner or someone you trust can make a big difference. Sharing your experience helps you feel less alone, and the person you confide in may offer emotional support or help you stay on track. Remember, masturbation is a normal part of life, so the person you talk to has likely experienced it themselves. Just having someone to listen can be a huge relief.

If you’re in a relationship, it’s important to make sure you and your partner are on the same page about masturbation. Physical intimacy, in whatever form works for both of you, is a key part of a healthy relationship. If intimacy feels lacking, it could be contributing to the issue. If needed, sex therapy—whether for yourself or as a couple—can provide guidance and help you move forward together.

2. Focus on Intimacy With Your Partner(s)

Shifting your focus to shared intimacy, you’ll naturally reduce the time and focus spent on solo behaviors. Intimacy is different for every relationship, but exploring each other’s preferences, desires, and needs can create new opportunities for bonding and fulfillment. Start by having an open and honest discussion about what each of you enjoys and what you’d like to try. From there, work together to find what feels good for both of you and build routines that prioritize mutual satisfaction.

3. Set Goals & Reward Yourself for Progress

Quitting any habit outright can feel overwhelming, and the same is true for reducing or stopping masturbation. Start by gradually cutting back on the number of times per day or week. Setting realistic goals, such as reducing frequency incrementally, can make the process more manageable. For example, you might aim to reduce from three times a day to two within a week, then reassess and adjust.

It’s important to acknowledge and celebrate milestones along the way, no matter how small they seem. Rewards can be a powerful motivator, whether it’s treating yourself to something you enjoy or simply taking pride in your achievements.

4. Change Up the Routine

Masturbation can be spontaneous but often occurs at specific times of the day. These may include when you wake up, shower, come home from school or work, or before bed. If this is true, doing something different may help. Take a quick, cold shower if you usually masturbate during long showers. Instead of masturbating in the morning, get out of bed and begin with whatever comes next in the routine—perhaps a healthy breakfast. Try something else relaxing before bed, like listening to soothing music with your eyes closed.

5. Cut Back or Stop Watching Porn

For many people, masturbation is closely tied to watching pornography. If this sounds familiar, it may be time to consider cutting back or stopping altogether. Pornography works by stimulating the brain’s pleasure pathway, creating a powerful mix of fantasy and natural euphoria. Excessive consumption of pornography can also increase the risk of developing a porn addiction, which can further fuel compulsive behaviors like masturbation.

If you’re looking to stop watching porn, there are several strategies you can try:

• Use blockers or filters on devices to restrict access to explicit websites.
• Intentionally avoid situations where you’d be tempted, such as being online alone in private spaces.
• Choose to browse the internet in public settings, like a coffee shop or library, where such behavior isn’t possible.

6. Limit Accessibility to Sex Toys

Sex toys can act as triggers, serving as visual or physical reminders of the temptation to return to old habits. Seeing them might make it harder to resist the urge to masturbate, by creating the idea of a “better” experience you could be having. To reduce this temptation, consider removing or storing them in a way that makes them less accessible.

7. Repeat Helpful Mantras When Urges Arise

When urges arise, repeating a calming mantra or focusing on a positive thought can help redirect your mind. Pair this with intentional deep breathing to further calm your body and reduce the intensity of the urge. For example, repeating phrases like “This urge will pass” or “I am in control” can reinforce your focus and help you regain composure.

8. Speak With a Professional

If you’re struggling with compulsive masturbation, talking to a professional can be one of the most effective steps you take. A therapist or counselor can help you address the behavior’s root cause and create a plan for long-term success. Plus, they offer a safe, confidential space to talk about what you’re going through.

Behavioral addictions are almost always tied to deeper issues, such as anxiety, depression, or feelings of shame. These emotions are completely normal, and with the right support, they can improve. A therapist can help you unpack these challenges, manage triggers, and develop healthier coping strategies.

9. Shift Your Focus With Neutral Visualizations

Masturbation often involves imagining scenarios or people that heighten arousal. To counter this, try focusing on mental images that do the opposite—something unexciting or neutral that lowers your desire. For example, you might picture a non-sexual situation, like folding laundry or sitting in a waiting room. Another option is to imagine something completely unrelated to your preferences or interests, which can further reduce arousal.

10. Use Healthy Distractions

Distractions can be a powerful tool for redirecting your focus and energy when urges arise. Healthy distractions might include activities like streaming a favorite show, playing video games, playing a board game, or spending time gardening.

Social distractions can also be effective, such as going out with friends, making a phone call, or sending a thoughtful message to someone you care about. The goal is to engage in something that captures your attention and helps you shift away from the urge to masturbate.

11. Exercise

Exercise is not only great for your physical health but also an effective way to manage urges to masturbate. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins, which relieve tension and create a calming effect. Exercise also boosts dopamine, a chemical in the brain that improves mood—helping to counter the need for the immediate gratification often associated with masturbation.

If traditional workouts like going to the gym aren’t appealing, don’t worry—exercise can be simple. Activities like taking a walk, cleaning the house, mowing the lawn, or even dancing in your living room count.

12. Join a Support Group

Connecting with others who understand what you’re going through can make a big difference. Support groups provide a safe and non-judgmental space to share your experiences, hear from others, and learn new strategies for managing compulsive behaviors like masturbation.

There are many groups available, including those specifically for behavioral addictions, such as masturbation or pornography, as well as general support groups for anxiety, shame, or other underlying issues.

13. Focus on Overall Self-Improvement

Everyone has areas they’d like to improve—whether it’s career, social connections, physical health, or personal skills. By channeling your energy into productive and fulfilling activities, you’ll naturally reduce the focus on masturbation while simultaneously building a stronger, more balanced life.

14. Be Patient & Compassionate Towards Yourself

Breaking any habit, especially one tied to deep emotions or coping mechanisms, takes time. It’s important to remember that progress isn’t always linear, and setbacks are a normal part of the process. Rather than judging yourself harshly when things don’t go perfectly, focus on treating yourself with kindness and understanding.

Negative Impacts of Excessive Masturbation

Excessive masturbation may lead to personal and interpersonal issues that cause physical, mental, and social distress.³

Excessive, compulsive, or chronic masturbation can cause negative impacts like:

• Skin irritation
• Edema (swelling)
• Inability to connect with a sexual partner
• Social isolation
• Excessive viewing of pornographic content
• Failure to complete important life tasks (e.g., parenting, working, going to school)
• Disinterest in activities once enjoyed
• Stress
• Lowered self-esteem
• Feelings of guilt or shame
• Depression, anxiety, and other mental health complications
• Potential for infection or physical harm from improper use and maintenance of sex toys
• Potential for legal issues if caught masturbating in public and other prohibited places
• Potential for masturbation addiction

How to Stop Masturbating Infographics