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  • Mental Health Issues
    • Anxiety
    • ADHD
    • Bipolar Disorder
    • Depression
    • Grief
    • OCD
    • Personality Disorders
    • PTSD
  • Relationships
    • Dating
    • Marriage
    • Sex & Intimacy
    • Infidelity
    • Relationships 101
  • Wellness
    • Anger
    • Burnout
    • Stress
    • Sleep
    • Meditation
    • Mindfulness
    • Yoga
  • Therapy
    • Starting Therapy
    • Types of Therapy
    • Best Online Therapy Services
    • Online Couples Therapy
    • Online Therapy for Teens
  • Medication
    • Anxiety Medication
    • Depression Medication
    • ADHD Medication
    • Best Online Psychiatrist Options
  • My Mental Health
    • Men
    • Women
    • BIPOC
    • LGBTQIA+
    • Parents
    • Teens
  • About Us
    • Editorial Policy
    • Advertising Policy
    • About Us
    • Find a Local Therapist
    • Join Our Free Directory
  • Depression Impact on SexDepression Impact on Sex
  • Antidepressant Affects on SexAntidepressant Affects on Sex
  • Possible to Enjoy Sex with DepressionPossible to Enjoy Sex with Depression
  • Tips for CopingTips for Coping
  • Get HelpGet Help
  • ConclusionConclusion
  • ResourcesResources
  • InfographicsInfographics

Depression & Sex: How Depression Impacts Sex & How To Cope

Martha Teater, LMFT Headshot

Written by: Martha Teater, LMFT

Kristen Fuller, MD

Reviewed by: Kristen Fuller, MD

Published: January 30, 2023
Martha Teater, LMFT Headshot
Written by:

Martha Teater

LMFT
Headshot of Dr. Kristen Fuller, MD
Reviewed by:

Kristen Fuller

MD

Depression and sex are closely linked. In addition to feelings of low self-esteem and fatigue, a defining feature of depression is no longer finding pleasure in things that used to be pleasurable. That may mean experiencing a lower sex drive and even sexual dysfunction. But therapy and certain lifestyle changes, like exercise and proper sleep, can significantly improve depression symptoms, including those negatively impacting your sex life.

You don’t have to face depression alone. BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $60 per week. Complete a brief questionnaire and get matched with the right therapist for you.

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for referrals by BetterHelp

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How Does Depression Impact Sex?

Many people struggle with their sexual functioning when they have depression. Sexual desire starts in the brain’s neurotransmitters, and when you experience depression, the brain doesn’t work properly and sometimes makes people feel much less sexual desire.1 Fatigue is also a common symptom of depression, and this can further reduce the desire for intimacy.

If you’re on antidepressants, you may find that your sex drive is reduced2 or you could experience crying during sex or after orgasm. Antidepressants may cause changes in sexual functioning, and your ability to reach orgasm may be different than when you’re not taking antidepressants.

Common sex-related issues associated with depression include:

  • Inability to achieve orgasm (anorgasmia) – This is characterized by changes in how long it takes to achieve orgasm, such as needing more time to achieve orgasm or needing different stimulation than what used to be required.3
  • Erectile dysfunction and/or delayed ejaculation – Many men experience erectile dysfunction or delayed ejaculation at various points in their lives. This situation occurs when a man has difficulty achieving an orgasm and/or ejaculation. If this happens occasionally, it’s not a cause for concern, but when it becomes chronic, it becomes more frustrating for the man and/or partner.
  • Premature ejaculation – Premature ejaculation occurs when a man can’t control his urge to have an orgasm during sex with his partner.4 An orgasm may often happen within one minute of penetration. Premature ejaculation is a common situation for men.
  • Decreased sex drive – When people have little interest in sex and few spontaneous thoughts about sex during the day it is considered a decreased sex drive (sometimes even hypoactive sexual desire disorder). They don’t fantasize much about sex and aren’t easily aroused to be intimate with a partner.

Can Sex-Related Issues Cause Depression?

While depression can contribute to sexual issues, it’s important to note that sexual issues can also worsen depression and increase feelings of worthlessness and despondence. Our sexual lives are tied in with our sense of value, desirability, and attractiveness, so when things aren’t going well sexually, our mood can certainly take a hit.

How Do Antidepressants Affect Sex?

Antidepressant medication can help counteract some of the symptoms of depression by altering the functioning of neurotransmitters in the brain, but side effects of SSRIs (a common antidepressant) may include sexual side effects, including sexual dysfunction.

Be sure to speak with your medical provider to determine if reduced interest in sex is due to depression or antidepressant medication. In that case, your prescriber may try a different antidepressant that is less likely to impact libido and sexual functioning.

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Is it Possible to Enjoy Sex with Depression?

With the right treatment, most people can manage their depression while still enjoying a healthy sex life. The first focus of treatment should be on treating depression. Once the depression is managed and your mood is improved, your sexual concerns will likely improve. If not, talk with your provider or a therapist.

5 Tips for Coping with Depression & Sex-Related Issues

There are many effective treatments for depression including several types of therapy for depression and antidepressants. If you take an antidepressant that negatively affects your sexual functioning or desire, talk with your medical provider about other options. There are many medication options, so it’s well worth trying a different medicine.

Five strategies to cope with depression’s impact on your sex life are:

1. Get More Exercise

Increasing aerobic and non-aerobic activity can improve your physical fitness and positively affect sex-related symptoms of depression.  Exercise is beneficial for mental health generally and can positively impact mood and self-esteem. Aerobic exercise increases blood flow, which is the key for arousal for men and women.

2. Break the Pattern of Not Having Sex 

Sometimes you can get into a routine of not having sex, and it can be tough to break out of that habit. People can consider having sex or being intimate even if they don’t really feel the desire to do so. Cuddling and non-sexual touch can help increase the feel-good chemicals in the brain and eventually increase sex drive.

3. Limit Your Use of Alcohol, Drugs & Tobacco

Using alcohol, drugs, or tobacco substances can all affect sexual performance and sexual satisfaction, so it’s a good idea to monitor your use when trying to increase your libido. Chronic use of these substances can cause low sex drive, sexual dysfunction, premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction, and trouble reaching orgasm.

4. Get Good Sleep

Fatigue and sleep deprivation can contribute to a loss of libido. Insomnia is a risk factor for sexual dysfunction, and a lack of sleep or having disrupted sleep patterns has been linked to having a higher risk of erectile dysfunction. Prioritize good, refreshing sleep, and you’ll likely see improvement in your sexual life.

5. Talk With Your Medical Provider

Your physician, nurse practitioner, or physician assistant can help adjust your medication doses, change your prescription, or try new medications if you’re taking an antidepressant or other medication that is contributing to your sexual issues.

When to Seek Professional Help

You may notice that even though you’ve done things that you hoped would help, you are still struggling. If this is the case, it’s certainly a good idea to talk with your medical provider. Talking to a therapist can also be a huge help. Therapists are trained to help people improve their sexual and relationship satisfaction, so don’t hesitate to reach out.  You can consider sex therapy with a sex therapist. If you need help finding a professional therapist who can help, try searching an online therapist directory.

Final Thoughts on Sex & Depression

It is possible to have a satisfying sex life even if you struggle with depression. And, if you have a frustrating sex life, it doesn’t have to get so bad that it contributes to depression. Effective depression treatments bring hope for an improved mood and a more fulfilling sex life.

Additional Resources

Education is just the first step on our path to improved mental health and emotional wellness. To help our readers take the next step in their journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy may be compensated for marketing by the companies mentioned below.

Talk Therapy 

Online-Therapy.com – Get support and guidance from a licensed therapist. Online-Therapy.com provides 45 minute weekly video sessions and unlimited text messaging with your therapist for only $64/week. Get Started

Online Psychiatry

Hims / Hers – If you’re living with anxiety or depression, finding the right medication match may make all the difference. Get FDA approved medication prescribed by your dedicated Hims / Hers Healthcare Provider and delivered right to your door. Plans start at $25 per month (first month)*. Get Started

Depression Newsletter

A free newsletter from Choosing Therapy for those impacted by depression. Get helpful tips and the latest information. Sign Up

Learn Anti-Stress & Relaxation Techniques

Mindfulness.com – Change your life by practicing mindfulness. In a few minutes a day, you can start developing mindfulness and meditation skills. Free Trial

Choosing Therapy Directory 

You can search for therapists by specialty,  experience, insurance, or price, and location. Find a therapist today.

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by Online-Therapy, Hims / Hers, and Mindfulness.com. *Hims / Hers Disclaimer: Subscription required. After first month, price is $85/month for a monthly subscription or $49/month for a three-month subscription ($123 for first order, $147 billed quarterly thereafter). Subscription automatically renews unless you cancel at least 7 days before renewal is processed.

For Further Reading

  • Prozac (Fluoxetine) Sexual Side Effects: What They Are & How to Manage Them
  • Best Sex Therapy Books
  • Best Books About Depression
  • Crippling Depression
  • 10 Best Depression Podcasts
  • Which Antidepressants Are Without Sexual Side Effects?

Stories You Might Like 


Self-punishment: a sign of depression, trauma, or OCD?

Self-punishment is a term that refers to behaviors or actions people engage in to inflict pain or harm upon themselves. These actions can show up in all kinds of ways and can include self-harm, negative self-talk, or engaging in risky behaviors. Understanding the underlying causes of self-punishment is crucial for identifying and providing appropriate support to people caught up in these damaging habits. Read More

Depression and OCD: How Are They Related?

Both obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) and major depressive disorder (MDD) are common mental health disorders, affecting millions of Americans each year. Studies have shown that people who have OCD are more likely to develop other forms of mental illness, and depression is no exception. According to the International OCD Foundation, around 25% to 50% of people with OCD also meet the diagnostic criteria for a major depressive episode. Read More

This content is sponsored By NOCD.

Depression & Sex Infographics

Depression & Sex 1   Depression & Sex 2   Depression & Sex 3

Sources

Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.

  • Phillips RL, Slaughter JR. American Family Physician. Depression and Sexual Desire. https://www.aafp.org/afp/2000/0815/p782.html. August 2000;15:782-786. Accessed 11/9/2021.

  • Taylor MJ, et al. Strategies for managing sexual dysfunction induced by antidepressant medication. Cochrane Database of Systematic Reviews. 2013; doi:10.1002/14651858.CD003382.pub3

  • Jenkins LC, Mulhall JP. Delayed orgasm and anorgasmia. Fertil Steril. 2015 Nov;104(5):1082-8. doi: 10.1016/j.fertnstert.2015.09.029. Epub 2015 Oct 9. PMID: 26439762; PMCID: PMC4816679.

  • American Academy of Family Physicians. Familydoctor.org. Premature Ejaculation. https://familydoctor.org/condition/premature-ejaculation Accessed 8/4/2020.

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  • Depression Impact on SexDepression Impact on Sex
  • Antidepressant Affects on SexAntidepressant Affects on Sex
  • Possible to Enjoy Sex with DepressionPossible to Enjoy Sex with Depression
  • Tips for CopingTips for Coping
  • Get HelpGet Help
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  • ResourcesResources
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