When the lines between work and your personal life become blurred, it’s time to start setting healthy boundaries at work. By doing so, you can minimize stress and burnout in your life. There are efficient and effective ways for setting boundaries without coming across as unprofessional or being a clock watcher. These changes can also help you at home.
This video summarizes some of the tips I share in this article, so take a look:
Don't Let Toxic Work Environment Sabotage Your Career
Toxic work environments can cause feelings of stress, burnout, anxiety, and depression. Therapy can help. BetterHelp has over 30,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $65 per week and is FSA/HSA eligible by most providers. Start getting the support you deserve by taking a free assessment.
Why Are Work Boundaries Important?
Boundaries at work are important as they help promote a healthy work-life balance. They can reduce the risk of experiencing work burnout, work anxiety, and even work depression. Boundaries can also make the work environment so much more pleasant when you take care of yourself and enforce your limitations.
Setting healthy boundaries in any situation allows you to protect your time, energy, and resources, while also maintaining relationships with others. Ultimately, setting boundaries is crucial to maintaining your overall well-being, happiness, and sanity in all areas of your life. When you do so at work and home, expect to see improvements in your physical and mental health.
As you set boundaries, you are practicing self-care with every action. As you learn to maintain your boundaries, you are able to improve your self-esteem and strengthen your personal and professional relationships. Healthy self-esteem allows you to assertively navigate through challenges. Additionally, a strong self-worth leads to increased net worth, but not the other way around. Research shows that increased self-esteem is positively correlated with job performance.1
Examples of Setting Boundaries at Work
Healthy work boundaries look the same whether you are dealing with authority figures–like your boss or supervisor–or coworkers. Obviously, there will be different scenarios that arise because of somebody’s position, but the spirit of these parameters remains constant. If you are dealing with an abusive boss or a toxic work environment, consider contacting HR and start working on an exit strategy. Speaking up is just one way to set healthy boundaries at work.
Examples of healthy work boundaries include:
Saying No to Extra Work
If you automatically say yes to taking on extra work regardless of your workload, you aren’t setting boundaries at work. If you are already overwhelmed and your workload is unmanageable, it’s okay to say no to additional work and then explain why. When you share why you are saying no, you can avoid work burnout and instead look to achieve a healthy work-life balance.
Limiting After-Work Hours
If you are continually working late or on weekends, set some limits and ask yourself why this is happening. Are you a workaholic? Are you expected to do more than you can handle? Or is it because you have some time management issues? Working long hours can take a toll on your mental and physical health. Don’t make it a habit.
To help you be more efficient, use the last ten minutes of your workday to clear and organize your desk. Tomorrow will be so much easier as a result. Update your to-do list, so you know what work you will focus on tomorrow. And don’t forget to reflect on all you have accomplished and give yourself credit for what you have done. Set up an auto response to your emails after work hours. Resist the temptation to respond to messages outside of work hours.
Taking Breaks Throughout the Day
There are simple things you can do, like taking breaks, to quiet your mind. This can reduce the tension you have been holding in your body and help you feel more relaxed while at work.
Below are examples of how to take a break at work:
- During meetings, calls, your commute, or any time at all, pay attention to your own breath.
- Every hour or so, stand up and stretch.
- If possible, step outside during your lunch or take a break to connect with nature.
- When eating, don’t do anything else, if possible. Take time to eat slowly and enjoy the smell and taste of the food.
- End your day with a short meditation or breathing exercise so you can leave work at work and be ready for home.
Not Discussing Personal Information During Meetings
To keep work meetings productive, avoid sharing personal information that can prolong the meeting or make it go off track. By doing so, it will keep the meetings straightforward and professional. Furthermore, only disclose information about your life you feel comfortable sharing. You don’t have to answer inappropriate questions if you don’t want to.
Leaving Work Materials at the Office
It’s tempting to work after hours when your laptop is sitting right next to you. If you work at home, leave your laptop in your work area separate from your living space. Silence work email alerts on your cell phone and let your employer know that after a certain time you won’t be available. When home, focus on non-work activities.
Do I Have a Target Painted on My Back?
No one should be manipulated or bullied by co-workers or a boss. A therapist can teach you to protect yourself and your career while building a happier life in and out of the workplace. BetterHelp starts at $65 per week and is FSA/HSA eligible by most providers. Take a free online assessment and get matched with the right therapist for you!
11 Ways to Set Healthy Boundaries at Work
When you have round-the-clock availability at work, not only can it disrupt your personal life, it can cause unnecessary stress causing sleepless nights. This stress of not enough work-life balance can trigger or exacerbate mental health issues like anxiety, depression, and eating disorders.
Whether you are in an authority role or not, you can effectively set healthy boundaries at work by leading by example. Be aware that not everyone will be on board as you make these changes. However, be firm as you stick with your boundaries.
Here are 11 tips for setting healthy boundaries at work:
1. Practice Saying No
Saying no can be hard, especially at work. But, it’s important to learn how to say “no” to a coworker or boss. We often feel like we have to say yes, even when we don’t want to. However, learning to say no is an important skill, and it can be helpful in both your personal and professional life. As you practice this, start small. It may sound silly, but practice makes perfect.
2. Be Assertive
Being assertive and consistent with your boundaries is important. If you have a “loosey-goosey” attitude about them, others will too. It’s okay to use assertive communication when setting boundaries. In fact, it’s often necessary. If you’re perceived as too passive, people start seeing you as a doormat. When you don’t respect your own boundaries, it’s easier for others to take advantage of you. To avoid this, be clear and concise while assertively communicating your boundaries to others.
Find your voice and use your words. Avoid under-communicating and speak your truth. Advocate for yourself as you would for somebody who you love very much. Communicate in a way that is honest, direct, clear, and demonstrates respect for yourself and others. Ask for what you need, including salary, pay, vacation time, and so forth. Being assertive is critical to performing well within a team.2
3. Create an Exit Strategy
If you find yourself in a toxic work environment, start looking for other work options and begin creating an exit strategy. Before you walk out the door, you’ll want to do some planning. Look at your finances as you plan your resignation date. Most financial experts suggest having enough money saved that is equivalent to six months of expenses. Also, consider that you won’t be eligible for unemployment compensation if you quit your job. The best time to look for another job is when you have a job. Start exploring your options now.
4. Remain Professional
If you are unhappy at work, you probably aren’t the only one feeling this way. As you create your exit strategy, don’t be lured into gossiping with coworkers and bad mouthing your company. Instead, focus on future career opportunities and what you can learn from the situation as you move forward.
5. Communicate Effectively
Speak honestly, assertively, diplomatically, and use “I” statements to express your feelings. Setting boundaries is not about being selfish or putting yourself first at all costs. Rather, it’s about taking care of yourself. When you set healthy work boundaries, you’re able to show up more fully in all areas of your life.
6. When Overwhelmed, Speak Up!
Speak up if you are feeling overwhelmed at work. Talk to your supervisor about your concerns and see if it’s possible to lighten your workload. Discuss your concerns with your boss and agree on a realistic amount of work that you can complete without feeling overwhelmed. It’s better to talk about your stress with someone who can help early on before it leads to burnout.
7. Plan for Pushback
Not everyone is going to respect your work boundaries and that’s okay. Really reflect on why these boundaries are important to you and be ready to defend them. However, be prepared to compromise. Boundaries are not set in stone and sometimes you need to be flexible. But, that doesn’t mean you should always give in. If you’re constantly compromising your boundaries, it’s time to reexamine why you are doing this.
8. Set Boundaries at Home
As you become more assertive with setting boundaries at work, you’ll want to make sure you are doing the same in your personal life. By doing so, it’s easier to maintain work-life balance. Boundaries at home vary from person to person. For example, if you value family time, you may request that family members refrain from using technology during shared dinnertime. Ask your partner not to discuss work during date nights or special time together. You can lead by example.
9. Practice Healthy Detachment
Detachment is a mindfulness strategy that involves healthy emotional separation from expectations, outcome, and negative emotions of self and others. Through mindfulness practices, such as deep breathing, meditation and yoga, you can develop the awareness and ability to let go of what you can not control; create some space from negative emotions and respond to them consciously; and protect yourself energetically from the negative emotions of others.
In Al-Anon, the support group for loved ones dealing with substance use disorders or addiction, they say to practice “detachment with love.” This means you can still care about others (your boss, your employer, etc.), but you don’t need to over-function, be overly responsible, or harm yourself in the context of your relationship with them.
10. Make Your Health a Priority
Don’t choose your job over your physical and mental health. When you are busy at work, it’s more important than ever to take care of yourself. Don’t skip doctor’s appointments or workouts and aim to eat healthy. Good nutrition enhances emotional well-being and decreases anxiety and depression which can improve job performance.
11. Cultivate Healthy Self-Esteem
I often say that healthy self-esteem is midway between “Diva and Doormat.” Divas are entitled and don’t respect other people’s needs and boundaries, and put themselves at risk of losing their jobs with disrespectful and aggressive behavior. Doormats do not respect their own boundaries. They allow themselves to be underpaid and overworked, and often communicate passive-aggressively. Individuals with healthy self-esteem demonstrate respect for both themselves and their employer; communicate assertively and clearly; look for the win-win of healthy work-life balance; and collaborate successfully.
Can Therapy Help?
If you find yourself struggling with setting boundaries, particularly at work, professional help is available. Consider online therapy, contacting your company’s employee assistance program (EAP), or utilizing an online therapist directory You might also attend 12-step meetings that can help you set healthy boundaries such as Al-Anon and CoDA.
Don't Let Toxic Work Environment Sabotage Your Career
Toxic work environments can cause feelings of stress, burnout, anxiety, and depression. Therapy can help. BetterHelp has over 30,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $65 per week and is FSA/HSA eligible by most providers. Start getting the support you deserve by taking a free assessment.
Final Thoughts
Setting boundaries at work is important as it can help you stay focused on your work and avoid getting distracted by other people or tasks. It can also help prevent overwhelm and create a much needed healthy work-life balance. Doing this is not easy, especially if you find yourself working in a toxic work environment or with a difficult boss. Know that by not setting healthy boundaries at work, you are jeopardizing your mental and physical health.
Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.
-
Akgunduz, Y. (2015). The influence of self-esteem and role stress on job performance in hotel businesses. International Journal of Contemporary Hospitality Management, 27(6), 1082–1099. https://doi.org/10.1108/ijchm-09-2013-0421
-
Pearsall, M. J., & Ellis, A. P. J. (2006). The Effects of Critical Team Member Assertiveness on Team Performance and Satisfaction. Journal of Management, 32(4), 575–594. https://doi.org/10.1177/0149206306289099
Your Voice Matters
Can't find what you're looking for?
Request an article! Tell ChoosingTherapy.com’s editorial team what questions you have about mental health, emotional wellness, relationships, and parenting. Our licensed therapists are just waiting to cover new topics you care about!
Leave your feedback for our editors.
Share your feedback on this article with our editors. If there’s something we missed or something we could improve on, we’d love to hear it.
Our writers and editors love compliments, too. :)
Additional Resources
To help our readers take the next step in their mental health journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy is compensated for marketing by the companies included below.
Therapy & Medication Using Your Insurance
Brightside – Together, medication and therapy can help you feel like yourself, faster. Brightside Health develops personalized plans that are unique to you and offers 1 on 1 support from start to finish. United Healthcare, Anthem, Cigna, and Aetna insurance are accepted. Start Free Assessment
Online Therapy
BetterHelp – Get support and guidance from a licensed therapist. BetterHelp has over 30,000 therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $65 per week and is FSA/HSA eligible by most providers. Take a free online assessment and get matched with the right therapist for you. Free Assessment
Psychiatry, with You in Mind
Talkiatry – Our psychiatrists can diagnose your condition, prescribe medication, and monitor your progress. Most psychiatry visits cost patients $30 or less* Free Assessment
Ketamine Therapy from Better U
Better U – Better U’s psychedelic-assisted therapy paves the way for profound healing and significant breakthroughs in well-being. Complete a free assessment so Better U can better understand your needs and ensure you receive a personalized treatment plan. Get Started
Mental Health Newsletter
A free newsletter from Choosing Therapy for those interested in mental health issues and fighting the stigma. Get helpful tips and the latest information. Sign Up
Choosing Therapy Directory
You can search for therapists by specialty, experience, insurance, or price, and location. Find a therapist today.
*Includes all types of patient cost: copayment, deductible, and coinsurance. Excludes no shows and includes $0 Visits.
For Further Reading
- Mental Health in the Workplace: Stats & Trends
- Mental Health Discrimination in the Workplace
- The Financial Mindset Fix: A Mental Fitness Program for an Abundant Life
- Boundary Boss by Terri Cole
- Boundaries by Dr. Cloud and Dr. Townsend
- Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
- Work Satisfaction Wheel
- Al-Anon
- CoDA
Online Anxiety Test
A few questions from Talkiatry can help you understand your symptoms and give you a recommendation for what to do next.
Best Online Therapy Services
There are a number of factors to consider when trying to determine which online therapy platform is going to be the best fit for you. It’s important to be mindful of what each platform costs, the services they provide you with, their providers’ training and level of expertise, and several other important criteria.