What Does it Mean to Be Monosexual?

What Is Monosexual?

Monosexuality is a sexual orientation characterized by romantic or sexual attraction to members of one gender or sex only. Monosexual individuals may identify as heterosexual, homosexual, or any other sexual orientation that involves attraction to only one gender. However, the term monosexual is not commonly used to describe individuals who are exclusively attracted to the opposite gender.

Sex Vs. Gender

It is important to understand the difference between sex and gender when learning about different sexual orientations. Sex refers to the biological and physiological characteristics that define males and females, while gender refers to the social and cultural roles, behaviors, and expectations associated with being male or female.

Research has shown that individuals may not necessarily conform to traditional gender roles or stereotypes and may identify as a different gender than the one assigned at birth. This can have a significant impact on an individual’s sexual orientation, as attraction may be based on gender identity rather than biological sex.¹

Understanding the difference between sex and gender can help to reduce discrimination and stigma towards individuals who do not conform to traditional gender roles and create a more accepting and supportive environment for people of all sexual orientations. By recognizing that gender is not binary and that individuals may identify as a different gender than the one assigned at birth, we can better understand and support individuals who identify as non-binary or transgender.

Monosexual Vs. Monoromantic

Monosexual individuals may be attracted to individuals of the same gender, opposite gender, or any other gender, but they are only attracted to one gender.² Conversely, monoromantic individuals may be attracted to individuals of the same gender, opposite gender, or any other gender, but they are only romantically attracted to one gender. While these terms are often used interchangeably, they refer to different aspects of an individual’s sexual orientation.

Examples of Monosexuality

Examples of monosexuality include individuals who identify as heterosexual or homosexual, as they are attracted to members of only one gender. This contrasts with bisexuality, which encompasses attraction to members of both genders and pansexuality, which encompasses attraction to individuals regardless of gender.

Examples of monosexuality include:

• Heterosexuality: Attraction to individuals of the opposite sex.
• Homosexuality: Attraction to individuals of the same sex.
• Androphilia: Attraction to individuals who identify as male.
• Gynephilia: Attraction to individuals who identify as female.
• Skoliosexuality: Attraction to individuals who identify as non-binary or genderqueer.
• Monosexual non-binary: Attraction to individuals of one gender but who identify as non-binary.

How Common is Monosexuality?

There is limited research on the prevalence of monosexuality, national surveys suggest that it may be the most common sexual orientation. A U.S. national survey found that 96.6% of adults identified as heterosexual, while 1.6% identified as gay or lesbian, and 0.7% identified as bisexual.³ Another study conducted in the U.K. found that 95.3% of adults identified as heterosexual, while 1.6% identified as gay or lesbian, and 0.7% identified as bisexual.⁴

The prevalence of monosexuality varies depending on the age of the population being studied. According to a U.S. national survey, 96.6% of adults identified as heterosexual, 1.6% identified as gay or lesbian, and 0.7% identified as bisexual.⁶ In contrast, as study conducted among teenagers found that 84% identified as heterosexual, 2% identified as gay or lesbian, and 14% identified as bisexual.⁶

It is important to note that these statistics may not accurately reflect the prevalence of different sexual orientations because many individuals may feel uncomfortable disclosing their sexual identity. Additionally, sexuality can be fluid, meaning an individual’s sexual orientation may change over time.

The Kinsey Scale

The Kinsey Scale is a tool used to measure sexual orientation on a continuum from 0 (exclusively heterosexual) to 6 (exclusively homosexual)⁵. Individuals who fall at a 0 on the Kinsey Scale are considered monosexual because they are exclusively attracted to individuals of one gender. The Kinsey Scale is just one way to conceptualize sexual orientation, and many other factors can influence an individual’s sexual identity.

Is Monosexual a Derogatory or Offensive Term?

Some individuals find the term monosexual offensive because it can be seen as implying that being attracted to only one gender is the norm or superior, while other sexual orientations are somehow deviant or less valid. The term may also be criticized for its binary nature, as it reinforces the notion of a strict gender binary and excludes individuals who identify as bisexual, pansexual, or non-monosexual.

Monosexual Privilege

Monosexual privilege refers to the societal advantages that individuals who are exclusively attracted to one gender may experience. This privilege often manifests in greater visibility, acceptance, and validation within society. Monosexual individuals may not face the same level of discrimination, marginalization, or erasure that individuals who identify as bisexual, pansexual, or non-monosexual often encounter.

While monosexual is not commonly used to describe discrimination against the bisexual, pansexual, and non-monosexual community, the term biphobia is more widely recognized and employed for that purpose. Biphobia refers to the prejudice, stereotypes, and discrimination faced by individuals who are attracted to more than one gender. It highlights the unique challenges and experiences that bisexual, pansexual, and non-monosexual individuals encounter within society.

Monosexual Myths

There are many myths and misconceptions surrounding monosexuality, which can contribute to stigma and discrimination toward individuals who identify as monosexual.

Here are five harmful myths about monosexual individuals:

1. They are not attracted to anyone outside of their gender: This is not true because monosexual individuals can experience attraction to individuals of other genders, but they may not act on these feelings or identify as bisexual or pansexual.
2. They are not open-minded or accepting of other sexual orientations: This is not true because an individual’s sexual orientation does not determine a person’s level of acceptance or openness towards others.
3. They are not capable of having meaningful relationships with individuals of other genders: This is not true because an individual’s sexual orientation does not determine their ability to form connections with others or their capacity for love and intimacy.
4. They are not as likely to experience discrimination or prejudice: This is not true because monosexual individuals can still face discrimination and prejudice based on their sexual orientation, particularly if they are part of other marginalized groups.
5. They are not as likely to question or explore their sexuality: This is not true because an individual’s sexual orientation does not determine their level of curiosity or desire to explore their sexuality.

Do I Have to Label My Sexuality?

It is important to recognize that sexual orientation is complex and can be fluid. Additionally, an individual can identify with any combination of sexual identities or orientations or they may choose not to label their sexuality at all. While labels can be helpful for some people to understand and communicate their sexual identity, they are not necessary or required for everyone.

One benefit of having a label for one’s sexual orientation is that it can help individuals find a sense of community and belonging. For example, identifying as bisexual may allow an individual to connect with others who share similar experiences and challenges. Additionally, labels can provide a framework for understanding one’s own attractions and desires, which can be helpful for personal growth and self-acceptance.

However, there are also reasons why someone may choose not to label their sexuality. For some individuals, labels can feel limiting or confining, and they may prefer to embrace the complexity and fluidity of their attractions without feeling like they need to fit into a specific category. Additionally, some individuals may not feel comfortable disclosing their sexual identity due to fear of discrimination or stigma. Ultimately, the decision to label or not label one’s sexuality is a personal one that should be respected and supported.

Can Therapy Help?

If someone is struggling or questioning their sexuality, they may consider seeking therapy to help them explore their feelings and experiences in a safe and supportive environment. Therapy can provide individuals with tools and strategies to cope with the challenges that can arise when coming to terms with their sexual identity, as well as help them develop a more positive and accepting relationship with themselves.

A therapist can help a person figure out how to come out to loved ones if they choose to do so. This can involve exploring the individual’s fears and concerns about coming out, developing a plan for how to have the conversation, and practicing effective communication skills. A therapist should never pressure an individual to come out before they are ready or disclose their sexual identity without consent. Ultimately, the decision to come out is a personal one that should be made on the individual’s own terms and timeline.

To find an LGBTQ+ therapist it may be helpful to ask for recommendations from friends or community organizations. Additionally, there are many online therapy options available that specialize in working with LGBTQ+ individuals.

In My Experience

Exploring one’s sexual identity can be a complex and challenging process, but seeking therapy can be a helpful way to navigate this journey. As this article has highlighted, there are many myths and misconceptions surrounding monosexuality, and it is important to recognize that sexuality is complex and can be fluid. While labels can be helpful for some individuals, they are not necessary or required for everyone.

If someone is struggling with their sexual identity, therapy can provide a safe and supportive space to explore their feelings and experiences. There are many resources available for finding an LGBTQ+ therapist, including online directories and specialized therapy options. A therapist can help individuals develop coping strategies and tools to navigate the challenges that may arise when coming to terms with their sexual identity.