Postpartum Rage: Symptoms, Causes, & Treatments

What Is Postpartum Rage?

Postpartum rage is marked by increased anger and less tolerance for stressors or frustrations. Pregnancy and childbirth require significant changes in the body’s endocrine system, and hormone fluctuations can lead to significant mood and behavioral changes. One of the more distressing developments can be bouts of postpartum rage or postpartum aggression, which is acting out in anger at self or others.

Postpartum Rage Vs. Postpartum Depression

In cases of postpartum depression, symptoms may include irritability, sleeping problems, fear of harming the baby, lack of interest in the baby, lack of pleasure in life, and difficulty staying focused on surroundings. For those experiencing postpartum rage, the negative emotions are directed more outwardly. Postpartum rage symptoms may include lashing out at others verbally, physically striking objects or people, an inability to manage daily stressors, or struggling to control tempers. New mothers may also ruminate on negative experiences and feel incapable of getting past their symptoms. Both postpartum depression and rage can co-exist and are related, but their relationship has not yet been determined.¹

How Long Does Postpartum Rage Last?

The timeline for recovering from bouts of postpartum rage depends on the individual, their risk factors, and whether or not they need professional help. Although there is no reliable recovery timeline, it is important to remember that PMADs are temporary and treatable.

Symptoms of Postpartum Rage

Postpartum rage symptoms often include difficulties controlling anger, lashing out at others, and aggression. This can be distressing for both the person experiencing the anger and those in their support network. Many parents are shocked by the angry feelings, outbursts, or thoughts accompanying postpartum rage. They may feel guilty about how their postpartum irritability impacted a loved one.

Common symptoms of postpartum rage include:

• Difficulty controlling anger
• Violent thoughts or urges toward loved ones
• Increased screaming or swearing
• Feeling out of control of emotions
• Physical outbursts, such as punching or throwing things
• Feeling angry about small things unrelated to parenthood
• Feeling angry or resentful when having to take care of baby
• Feeling unable to “move on” after being made angry
• Extreme irritability
• Feeling powerless or helpless

What Causes Postpartum Rage?

While the actual cause of postpartum rage is typically a combination of biology, genetic predisposition, psychology, and environment, specific risk factors increase the likelihood of experiencing postpartum anger.² These risk factors can impact the duration and intensity of a parent’s irritability and may determine whether or not professional treatment is needed.

Possible causes of postpartum rage include:

• Hormone changes: During pregnancy, a mother experiences various hormonal changes. After childbirth, there is another shift in hormones, and the decrease in estrogen and progesterone may be linked to postpartum mood changes.
• Family history of a mood disorder: If someone in the family has experienced mood disorders, such as anxiety or depression, even if not during pregnancy, there is an increased likelihood of postpartum anger.
• Changes in sleep routine: Lack of sleep can lead to irritability and moodiness. When sleep is consistently interrupted by a new baby’s waking, this can exacerbate the tendencies towards snapping at others and feelings of rage.
• New emotions related to childcare: For some new parents, realizing the level of responsibility for another human’s life can be overwhelming and may lead to increased feelings of protectiveness, which may be expressed as aggression.
• Changes in your life or relationships: With less time for oneself or other relationships, new parents may feel especially short-tempered and irritable. New parents may also believe that their lives have become just “caretaking” and resent the freedom others have that they have lost. These feelings can lead to postpartum anger.
• Societal and/or personal expectations: Some new parents may expect parenthood to be blissfully joyful as they nest with their new baby. However, they may be overwhelmed by the responsibilities and stress that new parenthood can bring. They may also feel they need to be the “perfect parent” and hold themselves to unattainable expectations they believe society has placed on them. These circumstances can lead to anger, resentment, and rage.
• A stressful, complicated, or traumatic delivery: New parents can experience post-traumatic stress disorder if they experience a traumatic birthing, which can contribute to the onset of postpartum rage.

How Postpartum Rage Affects Loved Ones

Unfortunately, the most common targets of postpartum rage are loved ones. The high proximity and time spent with these individuals increase the probability of them witnessing and becoming the target of postpartum aggression and irritability.

Loved ones who may be affected by postpartum rage include:

• Partners: In many cases, the new parent’s partner is one of the most involved in daily caregiving responsibilities. This means they are highly likely to be present for the stressful moments that trigger a postpartum anger outburst.
• Other children: Other children can become the target of postpartum anger. To an already tired parent, an older child’s needs or bids for attention can feel like an unfillable request on top of a newborn’s. In some cases, this can trigger an angry outburst.
• Grandparents: Sometimes, the grandparents’ expectations and opinions on the child’s care trigger postpartum rage. The angry parent might view them as someone who should have the ability to understand the stress of raising a newborn.

How Is Postpartum Rage Diagnosed?

While postpartum rage is not a stand-alone clinical diagnosis, it is considered a symptom of perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs). Generally, your obstetrician or care provider will assess you during your post-delivery check-up. While there is no postpartum rage “test,” Doctors will ask about symptoms of depression and anxiety and your overall adjustment to parenthood.

If you share with them that you are struggling or experiencing instances of rage or feelings of aggression, they can provide you with information for addressing these issues. In addition, your pediatrician is also likely to ask about your adjustment to parenting and how you are doing. Be upfront with these trusted professionals to ensure you get the support you need to provide your child with the best care possible.

Postpartum Rage Treatment Options

If postpartum rage is impairing your ability to function normally and do necessary tasks, it might be time to seek professional help. Working through your struggles and postpartum rage symptoms with a therapist can be beneficial. If you are ready to find the right therapist, ask your primary care provider for a referral or explore an online therapist directory to locate a therapist who suits your needs.

Common treatment approaches are:

• Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): CBT is more effective than antidepressants alone, which is a significant consideration for mothers who want to avoid medication due to breastfeeding.³
• Interpersonal psychotherapy (IPT): IPT is another effective treatment approach for treating postpartum rage. This modality can include the partner and can also be provided in group settings.⁴
• Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR): EMDR is an option to consider if trauma from pregnancy or birth was experienced, such as health complications or complicated/traumatic delivery.
• Medication: If you are experiencing severe postpartum rage, psychotherapy approaches alone may not be enough. Symptoms can be managed with psychotherapy, but medications for postpartum depression with anger may be necessary.

Ways to Cope With Postpartum Rage

While postpartum rage or “mom rage” symptoms can feel overwhelming and defeating, there are things you can do to manage your outbursts and improve your mental health. Learning how to deal with postpartum rage may look like trying a support group, relying on loved ones, and boosting your coping skills.

Below are 11 tips for coping with postpartum rage:

1. Join a support group: Support groups are a great source of inspiration for learning ways to manage postpartum anger. They provide a safe place for moms and other parents to feel validated and develop a community.
2. Lean on your support network: Strong support networks will not do any good if you do not take advantage of these resources. Do not let feelings of pride get in the way of ensuring you are in the best shape possible to care for your child.
3. Prioritize self-care: You must care for your needs to be present for your child. Airplanes remind you to put your oxygen mask on first, and this statement should be taken to heart when it comes to new motherhood–if you do not take care of yourself, you will not be able to care for anyone else.
4. Revisit a hobby you enjoy: You should not lose your sense of self when you become a mother. Every moment of your day does not have to be baby care–that can lead to resentment and anger. Make time for the things you enjoy because these breaks can help you be a more engaged and focused mom.
5. Don’t be afraid to ask for help: Caring for another human is a big job. When you are starting to feel overwhelmed, reach out for help.
6. Consider therapy: Professional support can be helpful when you cannot personally figure out your new role and responsibilities. Therapists can validate your feelings, help you work through your challenges, and provide treatment options.
7. Boost your coping skills: Increasing your ability to use healthy coping skills, such as mindful breathing, grounding techniques, and mindfulness, can help you intentionally manage angry feelings.
8. Try meditation: Meditation quiets your inner stress through intentional focus. Regularly engaging in meditation for anger introduces a sense of calm, decreases emotional reactivity, and can lower the frequency and intensity of postpartum rage outbursts.
9. Learn anger management skills: Identifying, labeling, and channeling anger are not skills many people are familiar with. Try different anger management skills to figure out what works best for you.
10. Identify your triggers: Once you feel more centered, reflect on what happened before your outburst. Understanding your triggers will help you communicate, figure out how to fill an unmet need, and help prevent future postpartum anger.
11. Remember that you are not alone: While this seems small, feeling isolated and alone can make postpartum rage even more stressful. Acknowledging that this is real and has happened to others can relieve some of the shame and stigma you might be carrying.

Final Thoughts

While postpartum rage can feel overwhelming, there are healthy ways to cope with your symptoms. Leaning on your support system, practicing self-calming activities, and seeking professional help can help you better manage bouts of aggression, irritability, and anger.