How to Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist

Why Finding a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist Is Important

A neurodiversity-affirming therapist approaches therapeutic work with the understanding that neurodivergent individuals do not need to be cured. Instead, they view autism, ADHD, dyslexia, Tourette’s syndrome (TS), OCD, dyspraxia, and other neurotypes as having unique strengths, needs, and challenges.^{1, 2} The neurodiversity movement shifts away from the idea that brains falling outside of “typical” are “disordered.”

In therapy, “goodness of fit” is a key element in the healing process. It is important to work with a therapist who understands your unique experience of the world. As neurodivergent clients, having a therapist who is knowledgeable about concerns like sensory issues, neurodivergent-specific anxieties, and neurodivergent burnout is beneficial. They can provide guidance and information specialists in other areas may not understand as well.

Risks of Therapy That Is Not Neurodiversity-Affirming

Therapists who are not neurodiversity-affirming may incorrectly label natural neurodiverse behaviors as problems or disorders. This misunderstanding can hurt clients’ self-esteem and cause them to internalize negative beliefs about their neurodiversity. As a result, neurodivergent clients might feel pressured to hide their true selves, which can increase their anxiety, depression, and risk of burnout. Additionally, non-affirming therapists might encourage interventions aimed at making neurodivergent clients behave in ways that are considered “normal” rather than respecting and addressing their unique needs.

One particularly damaging approach to autism is Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) therapy.³ ABA often focuses on suppressing autistic behaviors and enforcing neurotypical norms,  which can lead to loss of identity, increased mental health issues, and even trauma. Instead of embracing neurodiversity and neurodiverse traits, ABA’s compliance-based approach encourages conformity over an individual’s self-expression.

Where to Find a Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapist

When seeking a neurodiversity-affirming therapist, start by asking neurodivergent people you know if they have any therapist referrals. They might be able to provide you with contact information or direct you to a therapist’s website. Personal recommendations can be invaluable since they come from individuals who understand the importance of neurodiversity-affirmative care.

Often, primary care providers keep lists of mental health clinicians. They can recommend therapists who have experience working with neurodiverse clients and are more likely to be affirming in their approach. Alternatively, you can use a local therapist directory to search and browse therapists in your area. These directories typically offer clinician profiles, which include their specialties, approaches, and contact information. Reading through profiles can help you identify therapists who emphasize neurodiversity-affirmative practices.

If it’s difficult to find a neurodiverse-affirming therapist in your local area, consider exploring online therapy services. Teletherapy can connect you with a broader range of therapists since it’s not limited by geographical location. Finally, check with organizations that serve neurodiverse communities, such as local support groups or advocacy groups. These organizations often have resources and referral lists for neurodiversity-affirmative therapists.

What to Look For In a Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapist

When choosing a therapist, it can be difficult to determine what qualities to look for that make them a good fit for you. Some of these characteristics will depend on who you are, your values, your goals, and how you like to address challenges. Additionally, you should factor in possible costs if your insurance does not cover a particular provider or you plan to pay out of pocket for treatment.

Here are ten things to look for in a neurodiversity-affirmative therapist:

1. Understanding of neurodiversity: A therapist should view neurological differences as natural variations instead of deficits or disorders. This perspective recognizes the unique strengths and challenges neurodivergent clients face and promotes self-acceptance instead of trying to “fix” core aspects of a person’s neurology.
2. Experience and training: Look for therapists with specific training or experience working with neurodivergent clients. This ensures that they are familiar with the unique needs of these clients and may be able to work with them more effectively.

3. Therapeutic techniques: A neurodiversity-affirming therapist should use techniques that support, not eliminate, neurodivergent traits. This could include alternative ways of communicating or sensory-friendly practices that work with neurodivergent thinking styles.

4. Cultural competence: The therapist should understand neurodivergence as a form of cultural identity and respect the values and perspectives of the client and their community. This awareness provides a more inclusive and validating therapy experience and environment.

5. Client-centered approach: The therapist should prioritize the client’s goals and perspective rather than trying to make them fit into a neurotypical standard. This approach respects the individual’s autonomy and self-determination.

6. Personality Fit: Personality fit with a therapist goes a long way. The therapeutic process is easier and more effective when you feel like you can relate to your therapist. You might search for someone of a particular gender, age range, or community (e.g., LGBTQ+ or religious background).

7. Cost and insurance: Cost is a practical concern when finding a therapist. Sustained therapy is often essential, meaning that financial sustainability is an important consideration. Finding a therapist in-network with your insurance can make ongoing therapy more affordable. Also, check to see whether the therapist in question offers a sliding scale fee.

8. Availability: Availability can be a barrier when finding a neurodiversity-affirming therapist. Some providers may not be accepting new patients. Other times, their current openings do not fit your schedule. When contacting a potential therapist, feel free to ask about their usual hours of availability. Let them know what times and days work best for you (i.e., morning, afternoon, evening).

9. Flexibility in session structure: A neurodiversity-affirming therapist should be willing to adapt the session style to meet the needs of neurodivergent clients. This could involve offering different formats, like walk-and-talk therapy or frequent breaks in a stim-friendly environment.

10. Advocacy and empowerment focus: The therapist can emphasize building self-advocacy skills and empowering clients to navigate a neurotypical world. This could include helping clients understand their rights, developing strategies to advocate for accommodations, and connecting with support resources.

How to Filter Through a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist Directory

When reviewing a potential provider’s profile or website, check whether they mention experience in autism, ADHD, or neurodiversity. Some therapists are neurodivergent and list their neurotypes in their profiles. As the neurodiversity movement grows, more therapists are becoming open about their own identities. Also, avoid therapists who use stigmatizing language or suggest that being neurodivergent is something to be fixed.

What to Ask During a First Call With a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist

After selecting a few potential therapists, ask questions during your first phone call (also called a consultation) about their experience and what you can expect from treatment. This information can guide you in making an informed decision about your future care.

Here are questions to ask potential neurodiversity-affirming therapists:

• Can you tell me a little bit about your experience working with autistic/ADHD/neurodivergent clients?
• How and where did you learn about autism, ADHD, or neurodiversity?
• Are you autistic/ADHD/neurodivergent?
• What are some of the main approaches you use in therapy (e.g., psychodynamic therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)?
• How long do clients generally stay with your practice?
• Have you ever worked with (your specific area of concern)?
• Do you offer remote sessions via phone or video?
• Do you accept my insurance/offer a sliding scale fee?
• Is there anything I need to prepare for the first session?

What to Consider During Your First Appointment With a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist

The first few sessions are for getting to know your therapist. This process can take a while, so consider how you feel during each session. Are you comfortable speaking and sharing with your therapist? Do they seem curious and receptive? Do they have expertise or understanding in the areas you would like to explore? Do you feel worse after the session or better?

After three or four sessions, you’ll probably have a sense of whether your therapist is the right fit for you. Your therapist should also know if they can adequately support you. Letting a provider know you plan to seek someone else is okay if you notice signs of a bad therapist.

A good neurodiversity-affirming therapist will:

• Meet you where you are
• Help you learn more about yourself so you can better manage your concerns
• Respect you and how you choose to identify
• Be empowering and committed
• Challenge you to grow
• Show an interest in you as a person
• Remember the details you share with them
• Help you feel like you are uncovering things about yourself and learning something new
• Help you maintain healthy boundaries

What to Do if You Can’t Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist

Finding a therapist who is knowledgeable and well-versed in the strengths and challenges of the neurodiverse community may prove challenging. Still, new providers are entering the field all the time, so continue to check with insurance panels, online directories, and referral networks. New therapists in private practice tend to have the most availability.