Finding a neurodiversity-affirming therapist is crucial for feeling truly understood and supported. When you’re looking for a neurodiversity-affirming therapist, start by asking around in your personal circle, online communities, or your general practitioner for recommendations. You can also use an online therapist directory to filter for therapists who specialize in neurodiversity.
When you meet with a therapist, don’t be shy about asking how much experience they have with neurodiverse clients and what their approach to therapy is. Make sure they use respectful language, understand the principles of neurodiversity, and are willing to adapt their techniques to support and accommodate neurodiverse individuals. Trust your gut and choose someone who makes you feel comfortable and validated in your neurodiverse identity.
Neuropsychological Testing For Children
- Neurodiversity (including Autism Spectrum Disorder)
- Attention / Concentration (including ADHD)
- Learning Disorders (including Dyslexia)
Get answers in weeks, not months. Bend Health provides a complete neuropsychological report with in-depth findings, reviews with your school or pediatrician, along with a clinical diagnosis (if applicable). Plus, receive recommendations to support your child at home, in the community, and in the classroom. Learn more
Choosing Therapy is compensated for marketing by Bend Health.
Why Finding a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist Is Important
A neurodiversity-affirming therapist approaches therapeutic work with the understanding that neurodivergent individuals do not need to be cured. Instead, they view autism, ADHD, dyslexia, Tourette’s syndrome (TS), OCD, dyspraxia, and other neurotypes as having unique strengths, needs, and challenges.1, 2 The neurodiversity movement shifts away from the idea that brains falling outside of “typical” are “disordered.”
In therapy, “goodness of fit” is a key element in the healing process. It is important to work with a therapist who understands your unique experience of the world. As neurodivergent clients, having a therapist who is knowledgeable about concerns like sensory issues, neurodivergent-specific anxieties, and neurodivergent burnout is beneficial. They can provide guidance and information specialists in other areas may not understand as well.
Risks of Therapy That Is Not Neurodiversity-Affirming
Therapists who are not neurodiversity-affirming may incorrectly label natural neurodiverse behaviors as problems or disorders. This misunderstanding can harm clients’ self-esteem and lead them to internalize negative beliefs about their neurodiversity. As a result, neurodivergent clients might feel pressured to hide their true selves, which can increase their anxiety, depression, and risk of burnout. Additionally, non-affirming therapists might encourage interventions aimed at making neurodivergent clients behave in ways that are considered “normal” rather than respecting and addressing their unique needs.
One particularly damaging approach to autism is Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) therapy.3 ABA often focuses on suppressing autistic behaviors and enforcing neurotypical norms, which can lead to loss of identity, increased mental health issues, and even trauma. Instead of embracing neurodiversity and neurodiverse traits, ABA’s compliance-based approach encourages conformity over an individual’s self-expression.
Resources For Autism
Sensory Enrichment Program For Autism – Boost brain development to give your child more tools. Top 5 areas of improvement reported are Attention, Sleep, Sensory Processing, Eating, and Social Skills. Learn More
Pediatric Mental Healthcare For Autism Spectrum Disorder (ages 1 -17) Bend Health does not provide ABA Therapy. Bend Health is a virtual-first mental health care provider caring for kids, teens and their families. Build skills and routines that support your whole family with coaches, therapists and psychiatrists. For parent’s, Bend offers monthly progress updates and a peer support community. Many insurance plans are accepted. Learn More
Neuropsychological Testing For Children (including evaluations for Autism Spectrum Disorder, ADHD and Learning Disorders) Get answers in weeks, not months. Bend Health provides a complete report with in-depth findings, review with your schools, and a clinical diagnosis (if applicable). Learn more
Where to Find a Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapist
When seeking a neurodiverse-affirming therapist, start by asking neurodivergent people you know if they have any therapist referrals. They might be able to provide you with contact information or direct you to a therapist’s website. Personal recommendations can be invaluable since they come from individuals who understand the importance of neurodiversity-affirmative care.
Often, primary care providers keep lists of mental health clinicians. They can recommend therapists who have experience working with neurodiverse clients and are more likely to be affirming in their approach. Alternatively, you can use a local therapist directory to search and browse therapists in your area. These directories typically offer clinician profiles, which include their specialties, approaches, and contact information. Reading through profiles can help you identify therapists who emphasize neurodiversity-affirmative practices.
If it’s difficult to find a neurodiverse-affirming therapist in your local area, consider exploring online therapy services. Teletherapy can connect you with a broader range of therapists since it’s not limited by geographical location. Finally, check with organizations that serve neurodiverse communities, such as local support groups or advocacy groups. These organizations often have resources and referral lists for neurodiversity-affirmative therapists.
What to Look For In a Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapist
When choosing a therapist, it can be difficult to determine what qualities to look for that make them a good fit for you. Some of these characteristics will depend on who you are, your values, your goals, and how you like to address challenges. Additionally, you should factor in possible costs if your insurance does not cover a particular provider or you plan to pay out of pocket for treatment.
Here are ten things to look for in a neurodiversity-affirmative therapist:
- Understanding of neurodiversity: A therapist should view neurological differences as natural variations instead of deficits or disorders. This perspective recognizes the unique strengths and challenges neurodivergent clients face and promotes self-acceptance instead of trying to “fix” core aspects of a person’s neurology.
- Experience and training: Look for therapists with specific training or experience working with neurodivergent clients. This ensures that they are familiar with the unique needs of these clients and may be able to work with them more effectively.
- Therapeutic techniques: A neurodiverse-affirming therapist should use techniques that support and accommodate neurodivergent traits rather than try to eliminate them. This could include alternative ways of communicating or sensory-friendly practices that work with neurodivergent thinking styles.
- Cultural competence: The therapist should understand neurodivergence as a form of cultural identity and respect the values and perspectives of the client and their community. This awareness provides a more inclusive and validating therapy experience and environment.
- Client-centered approach: The therapist should prioritize the client’s goals and perspective rather than trying to make them fit into a neurotypical standard. This approach respects the individual’s autonomy and self-determination.
- Personality Fit: Personality fit with a therapist goes a long way. The therapeutic process is easier and more effective when you feel like you can relate to your therapist. You might search for someone of a particular gender, age range, or community (e.g., LGBTQ+ or religious background).
- Cost and insurance: Cost is a practical concern when finding a therapist. Sustained therapy is often essential, meaning that financial sustainability is an important consideration. Finding a therapist in-network with your insurance can make consistent long-term work a possibility. Also, check to see whether the therapist in question offers a sliding scale fee.
- Availability: Availability can be a barrier when finding a neurodiversity-affirming therapist. Some providers may not be accepting new patients. Other times, their current openings do not fit your schedule. When contacting a potential therapist, feel free to ask about their usual hours of availability. Let them know what times and days work best for you (i.e., morning, afternoon, evening).
- Flexibility in session structure: A neurodiversity-affirming therapist should be willing to adapt the session style to meet the needs of neurodivergent clients. This could involve offering different formats, like walk-and-talk therapy or frequent breaks in a stim-friendly environment.
- Advocacy and empowerment focus: The therapist can emphasize building self-advocacy skills and empowering clients to navigate a neurotypical world. This could include helping clients understand their rights, developing strategies to advocate for accommodations, and connecting with support resources.
Talkspace - Online Therapy With or Without Insurance
Your therapist can help you process thoughts and feelings, understand motivations, and develop coping skills. Covered by most major insurance plans. Talkspace also accepts Medicare in some states. The average copay is $15, but many people pay $0. Try Talkspace
How to Filter Through a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapists Directory
When reviewing a potential provider’s profile or website, check whether they mention experience in autism, ADHD, or neurodiversity. Some therapists are neurodivergent themselves and put their neurotypes in their profiles. As the neurodiversity movement grows, more therapists are becoming open about their own identities. Also, avoid any therapists who use stigmatizing language or who suggest that being neurodivergent is something to be fixed.
What to Ask During a First Call With a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist
After selecting a series of potential therapists, ask questions during your first phone call (also called a consultation) about their experience and what you can expect from treatment. This information can guide you in making an informed decision about your future care.
Here are questions to ask potential neurodiversity-affirming therapists:
- Can you tell me a little bit about your experience working with autistic/ADHD/neurodivergent clients?
- How/where did you learn about autism/ADHD/neurodiversity?
- Are you autistic/ADHD/neurodivergent?
- What are some of the main approaches you use in therapy (e.g., psychodynamic therapy, cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)?
- How long do clients generally stay with your practice?
- Have you ever worked with (your specific area of concern)?
- Do you offer remote sessions via phone or video?
- Do you accept my insurance/offer a sliding scale fee?
- Is there anything I need to prepare for the first session?
What to Consider During Your First Appointment With a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist
The first few sessions are for getting to know your therapist. This process can take a while, so consider how you feel during each session. Are you comfortable speaking and sharing with your therapist? Do they seem curious and receptive? Do they have expertise or understanding in the areas you would like to explore? Do you feel worse after the session or better?
After three or four sessions, you’ll probably have a sense of whether your therapist is the right fit for you. Your therapist should also know if they can adequately support you. Letting a provider know you plan to seek someone else is okay if you notice signs of a bad therapist.
A good neurodiversity-affirming therapist will:
- Meet you where you are
- Help you learn more about yourself so you can better manage your concerns
- Respect you and how you choose to identify
- Be empowering and committed
- Challenge you to grow
- Show an interest in you as a person
- Remember the details you share with them
- Help you feel like you are uncovering things about yourself and learning something new
- Help you maintain healthy boundaries
What to Do if You Can’t Find a Neurodiversity-Affirming Therapist
Finding a therapist who is knowledgeable and well-versed in the strengths and challenges of the neurodiverse community may prove challenging. Still, new providers are entering the field all the time, so continue to check with insurance panels, online directories, and referral networks. New therapists in private practice tend to have the most availability.
In My Experience
Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.
-
MEd, N. B. M. (2021, November 23). What is neurodiversity? Harvard Health. https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/what-is-neurodiversity-202111232645
-
Research, O. F. A., & Research, O. F. A. (2020, December 16). Peer support brings hope and strength for autism communities | Organization for Autism Research. Organization for Autism Research. https://researchautism.org/blog/peer-support-brings-hope-and-strength-for-autism-communities/
-
Leaf, J. B., Cihon, J. H., Leaf, R., McEachin, J., Liu, N., Russell, N., Unumb, L., Shapiro, S., & Khosrowshahi, D. (2022). Concerns About ABA-Based Intervention: An Evaluation and Recommendations. Journal of autism and developmental disorders, 52(6), 2838–2853. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10803-021-05137-y
We regularly update the articles on ChoosingTherapy.com to ensure we continue to reflect scientific consensus on the topics we cover, to incorporate new research into our articles, and to better answer our audience’s questions. When our content undergoes a significant revision, we summarize the changes that were made and the date on which they occurred. We also record the authors and medical reviewers who contributed to previous versions of the article. Read more about our editorial policies here.
Author: Sharon Kaye-O’Connor, LCSW (No Change)
Reviewer: Rajy Abulhosn, MD (No Change)
Primary Changes: Revised section titled “What to Look For In a Neurodiversity-Affirmative Therapist.”
Added section titled “Risks of Therapy That Is Not Neurodiversity-Affirming.” New content written by Gabrielle Juliano-Villani, LCSW, and medically reviewed by Kristen Fuller, MD. Fact-checked and edited for improved readability and clarity.
Author: Sharon Kaye-O’Connor, LCSW (No Change)
Reviewer: Rajy Abulhosn, MD (No Change)
Primary Changes: Fact-checked and edited for improved readability and clarity.
Author: Sharon Kaye-O’Connor, LCSW (No Change)
Reviewer: Rajy Abulhosn, MD (No Change)
Primary Changes: Added section titled “What Makes a Good Therapist?” New material written by Silvi Saxena, MBA, MSW, LSW, CCTP, OSW-C and medically reviewed by Kristen Fuller, MD. Fact-checked and edited for improved readability and clarity.
Author: Sharon Kaye-O’Connor, LCSW
Reviewer: Rajy Abulhosn, MD
Your Voice Matters
Can't find what you're looking for?
Request an article! Tell ChoosingTherapy.com’s editorial team what questions you have about mental health, emotional wellness, relationships, and parenting. Our licensed therapists are just waiting to cover new topics you care about!
Leave your feedback for our editors.
Share your feedback on this article with our editors. If there’s something we missed or something we could improve on, we’d love to hear it.
Our writers and editors love compliments, too. :)
Additional Resources
To help our readers take the next step in their mental health journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy is compensated for marketing by the companies included below.
Sensory Enrichment Program For Autism
Mendability – Boost brain development to give your child more tools. Top 5 areas of improvement reported are Attention, Sleep, Sensory Processing, Eating, and Social Skills. Learn More
Neurological Testing
Neuropsychological Testing For Children (including evaluations for Autism Spectrum Disorder, ADHD and Learning Disorders) Get answers in weeks, not months. Bend Health provides a complete report with in-depth findings, review with your schools, and a clinical diagnosis (if applicable). Learn more
Online Therapy & Coaching (ages 1 -17)
Bend Health is a virtual mental healthcare provider caring for kids, teens, and their families. Many insurance plans are accepted. Learn More
Autism Parenting Magazine
Are you looking for the most up-to-date news and professional guidance for you and your child on the subject of autism? Get A Free Issue
Best Online Therapy Services
There are a number of factors to consider when trying to determine which online therapy platform is going to be the best fit for you. It’s important to be mindful of what each platform costs, the services they provide you with, their providers’ training and level of expertise, and several other important criteria.