Sober Curious: What It Means & How to Practice

What Is Sober Curiosity?

The sober curious movement is a cultural phenomenon that encourages individuals to explore a more mindful and intentional relationship with alcohol. This concept emerged as a response to growing awareness about the physical and mental health impacts of alcohol. Sober curiosity invites people to question their drinking habits, consider the role alcohol plays in their lives, and explore alternatives to traditional drinking culture.

By embracing sober curiosity, individuals are encouraged to reevaluate their alcohol use and its effects. They may practice periods of abstinence, engage in alcohol-free social activities, or seek alternative beverages and experiences. The movement recognizes the potential health benefits of reduced alcohol consumption. Ultimately, sober curiosity fosters a more conscious and intentional approach to alcohol, empowering individuals to make choices that align with their values and well-being.

History of the Sober Curious Movement

Ruby Warrington sparked the term “sober curious” in her book Sober Curious: The Blissful Sleep, Greater Focus, Limitless Presence, and Deep Connection Awaiting Us All on the Other Side of Alcohol.¹ Similar to “Sober October” or “Dry January,” the Sober Curious Movement encourages people to assess their drinking patterns and consider drinking differently for a period.

The ideology behind the sober curious movement is rooted in the desire for personal growth, well-being, and self-discovery. This idea is not limited to individuals with severe alcohol dependency issues but welcomes anyone who wishes to explore a different perspective on alcohol consumption. Additionally, the movement fosters a supportive community where people can share their experiences, provide encouragement, and inspire others to embark on their own sober curious journeys.

Benefits of Being Sober Curious

Embracing a sober curious lifestyle offers numerous benefits for individuals seeking a mindful drinking approach to their relationship with alcohol. The concept allows for improved physical well-being, better sleep patterns, increased energy levels, and healthier liver function. Individuals also gain increased mental clarity, allowing them to experience focus, enhanced cognitive abilities, and improved emotional well-being.

Additionally, a sober curious lifestyle encourages deeper connections and authentic social interactions. Individuals learn to engage in meaningful conversations, establish genuine connections, and build stronger relationships without alcohol. They can fully experience and appreciate their surroundings and interactions without the numbing or altering effects of alcohol. Furthermore, a sober curious lifestyle promotes conscious choices aligned with personal values, leading to a greater sense of purpose and fulfillment.

Sober curious lifestyles may help reduce the risk of adverse alcohol side effects, such as:²

• Hangovers
• Sleep issues
• Challenges with focus and concentration
• Lowered immunity
• Anxiety disorders
• Depression
• Sexual issues
• Liver disease
• Risks of various types of cancer
• Developing alcohol use disorder
• Behavior changes
• Relationship issues
• Unintentional injuries

Criticisms of the Sober Curious Movement

Some critics disapprove of the sober curious movement. While being sober and curious sounds positive, some individuals have an ‘all-or-nothing’ idea of drinking. They explain that those re-evaluating their drinking habits may actually struggle with alcohol use disorder (AUD) and need professional help. This concern may stem from the tendency of society to lighten or diminish excessive alcohol consumption.

However, being sober curious is a harm-reduction approach.³ While the safest and healthiest method is likely alcohol abstinence, full sobriety may not be realistic or necessary for everyone. There are still benefits to examining how to drink safely, and consuming less alcohol is far better than making no changes.

10 Ways to Live the Sober Curious Lifestyle

Being sober curious doesn’t mean you can’t drink at all. Instead, you pay attention to why you use alcohol and what adjustments you want to make. The sober curious movement is about gaining awareness of how you can socially interact and live without alcohol.

The following are ten ways to start living a sober curious lifestyle:

1. Plan Ahead to Abstain From Alcohol

Planning alcohol-free events is a helpful part of maintaining a sober curious lifestyle. You can shake up the routine of drinking with friends by visiting a local coffee shop, checking out a new restaurant, or hiking. If your friends invite you to get drinks, determine if you want to drink and set a limit for yourself before meeting up with them.

2. Find a Sober Curious Social Group

Expand your social group by finding like-minded people who are also curious about their drinking and willing to practice being sober curious. Sober curiosity is a growing social movement, and you can look for events and support groups focusing on this culture, and making sober friends.

3. Develop New Sober Hobbies

While you may think most fun activities involve drinking, this isn’t the case. You can be social, have fun, meet new people, and have fewer regrets by changing your habits around alcohol. You can build confidence and continue to assess your use of alcohol in an open-minded way by exploring alcohol-free hobbies. Consider reading a book, taking a nature walk, or trying a new sport.

4. Consider Moderation

You can still drink alcohol while practicing moderation. Think ahead about how much you want to drink or how many drinks you can have in an hour. Alternatively, consider what alcohol-free drinks you can order to feel good and happy.* For those exploring sobriety but not ready for complete abstinence, adopting a California sober lifestyle, which allows for moderate use of substances like marijuana while abstaining from alcohol, might be an appealing approach.

***According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) and 2020-2025 Dietary Guidelines for Americans, limiting alcohol intake to two drinks or less per day for men and one or less for women is recommended for moderation.^{4, 5}

5. Explore Why You Drink

There are numerous reasons why people like to drink alcohol. In a nutshell, “People like to drink alcohol because of its ability to alter emotional states. Alcohol induces euphoria, relaxation, and disinhibition while reducing stress and anxiety.”⁶ Accordingly, people drink to lower inhibitions, have fun, socialize, celebrate, ritualize, seemingly enhance stimuli, avoid problems, forget about a difficult day, rebel against authority, numb pain, alleviate mental health symptoms, commiserate, as a means of self-punishment, curb the cycle of cravings and withdrawal, et cetera.

In the spirit of self-awareness, exploring why you drink can shed light on issues not otherwise considered. Journaling may help as you note events, thoughts, and feelings associated with drinking. Prompting a trusted other to share their perspective on the manner is also helpful, assuming you do not become defensive. Tackling this with a clear mind can reduce drinking and offer relief in other areas of life.

6. Change Your Environment

A general rule of thumb when attempting to abstain from alcohol (or entertain your sober curiosity) is to change your “persons, places, and things.” In this case, changing places can make a huge difference. Some environments feel inherently alcohol-related. Beyond bars, specific sports venues, movie theaters, and restaurants can make not drinking seem nearly impossible. In such instances, avoid these environments.

Try new places you want to explore because this can lead to natural mood enhancement as the brain releases dopamine (among other neurotransmitters).⁷

7. Get Physically Active

Exercise and mental health go hand-in-hand. Physical activity can improve brain health and reduce the risk of various diseases.⁸ For those leaning toward alcohol abstinence, exercise may further enhance the benefits of reduced drinking.

Though some individuals may have attempted to consume alcohol while working out, they quickly learn this is sometimes a dangerous idea. Furthermore, scheduling workouts throughout the day or week increases alcohol-free time.

8. Recognize Any Urge to Drink

You may notice increased anxiety, irritability, or ruminating thoughts when you step away from drinking. These changes may indicate you may relied on alcohol more than you thought. While enjoying an occasional drink without any strings attached is one thing, feeling the need to drink is another. Extending the time between drinks may help curb these urges.

9. Experiment with Mocktails

Mocktails have come a long way and are continually gaining popularity. Beyond the traditional (and tasty) Shirly Temple or virgin daiquiri, many non-alcoholic (N/A) substitutes are available at bars, lounges, and restaurants. Even liquor and grocery stores offer N/A beers, seltzers, spirits, and wines.

Some N/A options are fortified with vitamins so consumers can enjoy the taste and receive additional health benefits. Request a traditional glass if you feel self-conscious about drinking N/A beverages in public.

10. Use An App

Using mindful drinking apps or a Dry January app can help you stay on track and hold you accountable for reaching your goals. Whether you’re abstaining from alcohol for a specific period of time or looking to make it a long-term solution, an app could be helpful.

Finding Support & Professional Help

Having support as you explore sober curiosity can be beneficial, and a therapist can help you process how you plan to move forward. You may be able to identify the issues driving your alcohol use and find alternative coping mechanisms besides drinking, allowing yourself to foster a healthier relationship with alcohol.

If being sober curious helps you recognize an alcohol use disorder, remember there is no shame in going to rehab to better yourself. Seeking treatment doesn’t have to flip your world upside down–many inpatient and outpatient rehab programs allow you to maintain your daily life.

Final Thoughts

Being sober curious isn’t for everyone, but choosing to reduce your consumption of alcohol provides numerous health benefits. There are many ways to practice being sober curious, so don’t be afraid to experiment and make the experience your own. Don’t let others sway your decisions–stick to what works best for you.