• Mental Health
    • Anxiety
    • Depression
    • Bipolar Disorder
    • ADHD
    • Addiction
      • What is Addiction?
      • What Are Behavioral Addictions?
      • Addiction vs Dependence
      • Addiction Myths vs Facts
      • Addiction Statistics
      • How to Help a Friend
      • Find an Addiction Specialist
    • Eating Disorders
    • Personality Disorders
      • Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder
        • OCD vs. OCPD
    • Trauma
      • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
        • PTSD & COVID-19
      • Childhood Trauma
    • Sexual Disorders
      • Anorgasmia
      • Female Sexual Arousal Disorder (FSAD)
      • Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD)
      • Premature Ejaculation (PE)
      • Delayed Ejaculation
    • Schizophrenia
  • Therapy Techniques
    • Online Therapy
      • Best Online Therapy
      • Online Therapy for Teens
      • Best LGBTQ Online Therapy
      • Best Online Therapy for Insurance
    • Psychotherapy
    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
      • CBT for Anxiety
      • CBT for Social Anxiety
      • CBT for Panic Disorder
      • CBT for Insomnia
      • CBT Online
    • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
      • DBT for Teens
    • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
    • Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
      • EMDR for PTSD
      • EMDR for Anxiety
      • EMDR Online
    • Art Therapy
    • Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA)
    • Exposure and Response Prevention
    • Group Therapy
    • Hypnotherapy
    • Motivational Interviewing
    • Person Centered Therapy
    • Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy
    • Sex Therapy
  • Types of Therapists
    • Faith-Based & Christian Counselors
    • Life Coaching
    • Family Therapist
      • Child & Teen Counseling
    • Marriage & Couples Counselors
      • Premarital Counseling
    • Psychiatrist
      • Psychology vs. Psychiatry
    • Psychotherapist
    • Grief Counselors
    • Online Therapists
  • Starting Therapy FAQ
    • Does Therapy Work?
      • How to Find a Therapist
      • Helping a Friend or Loved One
    • How to Choose a Therapist
      • Finding a Black Therapist
      • Finding a Latinx Therapist
      • Finding an LGBTQ-Friendly Therapist
      • Finding a Therapist as a Young Adult
      • Finding an Online Therapist
    • Preparing for Your First Session
    • Types of Mental Health Professionals
    • Mental Health Insurance
      • HSAs for Therapy
      • Sliding Scale Therapy Fees
    • Mental Health in the Workplace
      • Asking for a Mental Health Day
      • Taking Time Off for Mental Health
    • Top Mental Health Organizations
      • Mental Health Resources Outside the U.S.
  • About Us
    • About Us
    • Editorial Policy
    • Advertising Policy
    • Privacy Policy
    • Contact Us
    • Write for Us
    • Join the Directory
    • Careers
  • Therapist Directory
    • Find a Therapist
    • Join the Directory
    • Directory Login
  • Mental Health
    • Anxiety
    • Depression
    • Bipolar Disorder
    • ADHD
    • Addiction
      • What is Addiction?
      • What Are Behavioral Addictions?
      • Addiction vs Dependence
      • Addiction Myths vs Facts
      • Addiction Statistics
      • How to Help a Friend
      • Find an Addiction Specialist
    • Eating Disorders
    • Personality Disorders
      • Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder
        • OCD vs. OCPD
    • Trauma
      • Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
        • PTSD & COVID-19
      • Childhood Trauma
    • Sexual Disorders
      • Anorgasmia
      • Female Sexual Arousal Disorder (FSAD)
      • Hypoactive Sexual Desire Disorder (HSDD)
      • Premature Ejaculation (PE)
      • Delayed Ejaculation
    • Schizophrenia
  • Therapy Techniques
    • Online Therapy
      • Best Online Therapy
      • Online Therapy for Teens
      • Best LGBTQ Online Therapy
      • Best Online Therapy for Insurance
    • Psychotherapy
    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
      • CBT for Anxiety
      • CBT for Social Anxiety
      • CBT for Panic Disorder
      • CBT for Insomnia
      • CBT Online
    • Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT)
      • DBT for Teens
    • Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
    • Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR)
      • EMDR for PTSD
      • EMDR for Anxiety
      • EMDR Online
    • Art Therapy
    • Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA)
    • Exposure and Response Prevention
    • Group Therapy
    • Hypnotherapy
    • Motivational Interviewing
    • Person Centered Therapy
    • Rational Emotive Behavioral Therapy
    • Sex Therapy
  • Types of Therapists
    • Faith-Based & Christian Counselors
    • Life Coaching
    • Family Therapist
      • Child & Teen Counseling
    • Marriage & Couples Counselors
      • Premarital Counseling
    • Psychiatrist
      • Psychology vs. Psychiatry
    • Psychotherapist
    • Grief Counselors
    • Online Therapists
  • Starting Therapy FAQ
    • Does Therapy Work?
      • How to Find a Therapist
      • Helping a Friend or Loved One
    • How to Choose a Therapist
      • Finding a Black Therapist
      • Finding a Latinx Therapist
      • Finding an LGBTQ-Friendly Therapist
      • Finding a Therapist as a Young Adult
      • Finding an Online Therapist
    • Preparing for Your First Session
    • Types of Mental Health Professionals
    • Mental Health Insurance
      • HSAs for Therapy
      • Sliding Scale Therapy Fees
    • Mental Health in the Workplace
      • Asking for a Mental Health Day
      • Taking Time Off for Mental Health
    • Top Mental Health Organizations
      • Mental Health Resources Outside the U.S.
  • About Us
    • About Us
    • Editorial Policy
    • Advertising Policy
    • Privacy Policy
    • Contact Us
    • Write for Us
    • Join the Directory
    • Careers
  • Therapist Directory
    • Find a Therapist
    • Join the Directory
    • Directory Login
Skip to content

How Important Is Sex In A Relationship?

Published: October 5, 2022 Updated: March 21, 2023
Published: 10/05/2022 Updated: 03/21/2023
Headshot of Krista Jordan, PhD
Written by:

Krista Jordan

PhD
Headshot of Dr. Kristen Fuller, MD
Reviewed by:

Kristen Fuller

MD
  • Does Sexual Satisfaction Lead to Relationship Satisfaction?Sex & Relationships
  • Benefits of Sex In a RelationshipBenefits
  • Ideal Frequency of Sex In a RelationshipFrequency
  • Causes of a Changing Sex DriveChanging Sex Drive
  • Tips to Approach the Topic of Sex With Your PartnerTalking About Sex
  • AsexualityAsexuality
  • Other Ways to Build Intimacy Outside of SexBuilding Intimacy
  • How to Find a TherapistTherapy
  • Final Thoughts On Sex In a RelationshipConclusion
  • Additional ResourcesResources
  • How Important Is Sex in a Relationship InfographicsInfographics
Headshot of Krista Jordan, PhD
Written by:

Krista Jordan

PhD
Headshot of Dr. Kristen Fuller, MD
Reviewed by:

Kristen Fuller

MD

Sex is often an important component to romantic relationships; however, if you can’t have traditional sexual intercourse or choose not to, there is nothing wrong with your relationship. Humans choose or adapt to all kinds of arrangements. Still, for many people, especially those in a long-term relationship, a healthy sex life is essential. It helps build a bond with your partner, express your love, and can even improve self-confidence.

Is your relationship a source of frustration or disappointment?

You can improve your relationship! Ritual provides guidance to individuals working to improve their relationship, or couples working jointly. Ritual combines video sessions led by a relationship expert, with short online activities. 14-day money-back guarantee. Try Ritual

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by Ritual.

Get Started

Does Sexual Satisfaction Lead to Relationship Satisfaction?

There seems to be consensus that, at least for many people, sexual satisfaction impacts relationship satisfaction.1,2,3,4 Not only do people with satisfying sex lives feel better about their relationships, they also have higher ratings of happiness and mental health.5,6,7 Several researchers found that people who report having a satisfying sex life also report feeling that their lives have more meaning.8,9

“Sex is a whole-body, whole-person investment in the life and pleasure of another,” says Carole Cullen LMFT. “If it is important to at least one of you, it is critical to fight for it for the sake of your relationship.”

Benefits of Sex In a Relationship

Sex is good for you. Sex in a relationship has many benefits, including reduced anxiety, improved sleep, decreased physical pain, and increased intimacy.

Sexual satisfaction in a relationship has these benefits:

  • Builds trust and intimacy
  • Helps heal old emotional and sexual injuries
  • Helps you become an expert on your partner
  • Helps you learn about yourself
  • Builds self-esteem
  • Supports good health
  • Improves sleep
  • Reduces anxiety and stress
  • Decreases physical pain (e.g. migraines)
  • Leads to wanting more sex
  • Promotes better cognitive function

Ideal Frequency of Sex In a Relationship

One study found that greater frequency is related to greater sexual satisfaction in both women and men.10,11,12,13 But there is no magic number that works for everyone. The optimal frequency is usually an average between each person’s libido, because libidos are rarely equally matched. Like all things in relationships, sexual frequency needs to feel fair to both parties.

Cullen says, “There is no right or wrong amount of sex that couples should be having in their relationship. However, if one of you feels frequency is a concern in your relationship then you should make time to discuss what the expectations are or barriers to meeting each other’s needs in this area.”

Differences In Libido

If one partner seems to have no desire for sex and the other does, this could present significant challenges to the relationship. Each partner should take a non-judgemental, sympathetic stance towards their partner’s natural libido level and negotiate from there. Work on talking openly about libido levels and any feelings of rejection or frustration, especially if you feel like you’re headed toward a sexless marriage or relationship.

While many studies show that frequency of sex correlates with sexual satisfaction, it does not always tell the whole story. A satisfying sex life and a warm interpersonal climate seem to matter more than greater frequency of intercourse.13 If both parties feel that the sexual encounters themselves are satisfying and that there’s a high degree of emotional intimacy, then frequency becomes secondary, albeit often not entirely insignificant.

Sex & Gender

Research tends to show that cisgendered men think about sex more frequently than women.7,14,15 Research on this topic hasn’t fully caught up with diversity and inclusion efforts, so while gay men, lesbian women, and cisgendered heterosexual couples have all been surveyed, transgendered and non-binary people are conspicuously absent from research.

One national survey found that over 50% of the men reported thinking about sex daily, whereas only 20% of the women reported thinking about sex that often.7 Another study on desire and gender replicated those findings; in their study, 91% of the men but only 52% of the women experienced sexual desire several times a week or more.

In other studies on daily sexual thoughts, twenty-somethings were asked to monitor their sexual feelings for one week. Researchers found that men had more than twice as many sexual urges each day as compared to the women.14,15 These results loosely held for people who identified as being same-sex attracted, as well as those who were married or cohabitating.14,15

Still, cisgendered women’s libido is complex. Some literature says that many women may not generate their own sexual fantasy, images, or impulses so much as choose to respond to those brought by their partner. Many women resonate with the idea of two different types of sex drive— instigative and receptive. Some women seem to have much more of a responsive vs. initiative drive.16,17,18

Causes of a Changing Sex Drive

There are many reasons why you or your partner may experience a change in sex drive, including big life changes, new medications, health issues, mental health concerns, and hormonal imbalances.

These things can all impact someone’s sex life:

  • Life transitions (e.g., childbirth, menopause, new job, job loss, grief, etc.)
  • Infertility 
  • Hormone changes
  • Medication side effects
  • Mental health issues

Relationship issues (e.g., infidelity, an emotional affair, or other betrayal trauma)

Ready To Invest In Improving Your Relationship

Free Couples Relationship Course – OurRelationship has been proven to help couples improve communication, intimacy, and trust. 94% would recommend it to a friend. Get Started


Relationship Guidance (Partner participation optional.) – You can improve your relationship! Ritual combines video sessions led by a relationship expert, with short online activities. 14-day money-back guarantee. Start now


Individual Therapy – Happy, healthy relationships start with YOU. Try online therapy and bring your best self to your relationships. BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. Visit BetterHelp


Couples Therapy – Work together to restore trust and rekindle loving feelings. Video and text based couples counseling start at $50 per week. Try Online-Therapy

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by OurRelationship, Ritual, BetterHelp, and Online-Therapy.

Tips to Approach the Topic of Sex With Your Partner

Sex can be a sensitive topic for couples to discuss. Be aware that many people feel some inadequacy or shame around sex, so be conscious of their feelings and reactions. For example, saying “I really enjoy our sex and love having you as my partner, but I was hoping we could try some different things,” or “I wanted to see if we could increase/decrease the frequency a bit” tends to go over better vs. “I’m feeling bored in the bedroom” or “Can you stop asking me for sex all the time?”

Here are tips to approach the topic of sex with your partner:

Pick the Right Time

When starting a conversation about sex, make sure you have enough time to finish the topic. Don’t bring it up if you have been drinking or doing drugs, or if one of you is tired or had a bad day. Pick a time when you are both relaxed and can handle the complex subject.

Pay Attention to Your Partner’s Reaction

As with all communication, remember to watch your partner for signs of distress. If you see them getting uncomfortable, take a minute to pause, breathe, and help them settle. When thinking through how to best communicate in your relationship, paying attention to cues from your partner can be incredibly important to make sure you are both on the same page.

Take the Pressure Off

If you feel awkward about starting the conversation, there are games you can purchase online or in stores that ask questions about sexual fantasies, positions, and practices. This can create a more playful mood and take the pressure off.

Be Playful

Sexual toys can be helpful if you’re having any physical issues (erectile dysfunction, delayed orgasm, etc.). These days, it’s easy to buy them discreetly from reputable websites, or you can visit a local store. This can be a fun date with a partner and a great way to start the conversation about what you might want to change in your sex life.

See a Relationship or Marriage Counselor

For many couples, professional support is necessary to effectively talk about sex or mismatched libidos. If either person is struggling to broach the topic, consider attending marriage or couples counseling. Sometimes, it may be appropriate to attend sex therapy specifically.

Is your relationship a source of frustration or disappointment?

You can improve your relationship! Ritual provides guidance to individuals working to improve their relationship, or couples working jointly. Ritual combines video sessions led by a relationship expert, with short online activities. 14-day money-back guarantee. Try Ritual

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by Ritual.

Get Started

Asexuality

Asexuality is a consistent and widely found variation in human sexuality that deserves representation, understanding, and respect. The Asexuality Visibility & Education Network (AVEN) has 30,000 members to date. In studies, asexual people were just as likely to be involved in an intimate partnership as those who identified as sexual. The two groups were comparable in general well-being, life satisfaction, and social support.19,20

Other Ways to Build Intimacy Outside of Sex

In general, ways to build intimacy outside of sex include:

  • Holding hands
  • Cuddling
  • Date nights or activities you both enjoy
  • Frequent hugs and kisses
  • Meaningful conversation

Prolonged Eye Contact

One “bio hack” for connecting and building intimacy is eye contact. While everyone’s comfort with it varies, most people can tolerate and even enjoy brief periods of it. Try sitting face to face with your partner, a little less than arm’s length apart, and look into each other’s eyes. Notice if you see any changes on their face, in their breathing patterns, or in their posture. At first, they may tense up, but after a few seconds, you should see the muscles of the face begin to relax, posture soften, and breathing slow.

One-Minute Hugs

Another great way to build intimacy in couples is belly-to-belly, chest-to-chest hugs. You press the ventral vagus nerve branch of each partner against the other, causing a relaxation response. Hold this for at least 60 seconds; like with eye contact, you may notice them stiffen before relaxing. If you feel areas of tension, move your hands to those areas and rub gently.

Benefits of Nonsexual Skin-to-Skin Contact

Couples who are not engaging in regular sexual contact (at least a few times per month) should try to dedicate 10-15 minutes per day to be in skin-to-skin contact. This can be on the couch while watching Netflix, laying in bed reading, or cuddling while falling asleep. Other types of touch besides skin-to-skin may not confer all of the physiologic benefits.

The benefits of nonsexual skin-to-skin contact include increased feelings of connections and safety, decreased cortisol levels, and improved immunity.

The physiologic benefits of skin-to-skin connection are:21

  • Improved immunity
  • Decreased cortisol levels
  • Release of oxytocin, the bonding hormone
  • Increased feelings of safety
  • Increased feelings of connection
  • Improved communication

How to Find a Therapist

There are great organizations out there who offer information, guidance, and help for all matters of sexual concern. Additionally, most therapists are versed in sexuality and some specialize in it. With so many resources, you can feel optimistic about addressing your particular needs. Start your search in an online therapist directory where you can find sex therapists, sex therapists with sensate focus, couples counselors, and more.

Final Thoughts On Sex In a Relationship

Research suggests that for about 98-99% of the population, sex is an important part of how we relate to our romantic partners.10,19,20,22,23,24 If you find yourself uncomfortable with your sexuality or sexual functioning, or if your sex life with a partner feels sub-optimal, it’s important to take steps to get help.

Additional Resources

Education is just the first step on our path to improved mental health and emotional wellness. To help our readers take the next step in their journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy may be compensated for marketing by the companies mentioned below.

BetterHelp (Online Therapy) – Relationships aren’t easy – a licensed therapist can help. Live sessions can be done via phone, video, or live-chat. Plus, you can message your therapist whenever you want. Visit BetterHelp

Online-Therapy.com (Online Couples Therapy) – Do you and your partner want to work together to have less arguments and better communication? Are there children involved and being caught in the crossfire? Do you love each other but are having a rough time operating as one unit? Couples therapy can help. Get Started

Ritual (Relationship Guidance) – Ritual provides guidance to individuals working to improve their relationship, or couples working jointly. Ritual combines video sessions led by a relationship expert, with short online activities. 14-day money-back guarantee. Try Ritual

OurRelationship (Free Couples Course) – OurRelationship has been proven to help couples improve communication, intimacy, and trust. 94% would recommend it to a friend. Get Started

Mindfulness.com (App) – During a disagreement, controlling one’s anger can be difficult, particularly if your partner starts yelling. Mindfulness can prevent one from saying and doing things that lead to regret. Free 7-Day Trial

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by BetterHelp, Online-Therapy.com, Ritual, OurRelationship, and Mindfulness.com

For Further Reading

  • The Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction
  • Sex Therapy Books
  • The National Coalition for Sexual Health 
  • American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, and Therapists
  • Best Books on Sex & Intimacy
  • My Husband Has Lost Interest in Me Sexually: 9 Possible Reasons & Tips to Get Your Sex Lives Back on Track

How Important Is Sex in a Relationship Infographics

Does Sexual Satisfaction Lead to Relationship Satisfaction? Benefits of Sex in a Relationship Tips to Approach the Topic of Sex With Your Partner

24 sources

Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.

  • Birnie‐Porter, C and Hunt (2105). Does relationship status matter for sexual satisfaction? The roles of intimacy and attachment avoidance in sexual satisfaction across five types of ongoing sexual relationships, The Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, 24(2), 174-183, doi 10.3138/cjhs.242-A5.

  • Impett, E. A., Strachman, A., Finkel, E. J., & Gable, S. L. (2008). Maintaining sexual desire in intimate relationships: The importance of approaching goals. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 94(5), 808–823. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-3514.94.5.808

  • O’Leary, K.D., Acevedo, B.P., Aron, A., Huddy,L. and Mashek, D. (2012). Is Long-Term Love More than a Rare Phenomenon? If So, What are Its Correlates, Journal of Social Psychological and Personality Science, doi: 10.1177/1948550611417015.

  • Sprecher, S., & Cate, R. M. (2004). Sexual Satisfaction and Sexual Expression as Predictors of Relationship Satisfaction and Stability. In J. H. Harvey, A. Wenzel, & S. Sprecher (Eds.), The handbook of sexuality in close relationships, 235–256. Lawrence Erlbaum Associates Publishers.

  • Blanchflower, D. and Oswald, A. (2004). Money, Sex, and Happiness: An Empirical Study. NBER Working Paper No. w10499, Available at SSRN: https://ssrn.com/abstract=552104

  • Laumann E.O., Paik, A., Glasser D.B., Kang J.H., Wang T., Levinson, B., Moreira E.D., Jr., Nicolosi A., Gingell, C. (2006). A cross-national study of subjective sexual well-being among older women and men: findings from the Global Study of Sexual Attitudes and Behaviors. Archives of Sex Behaviors, 35(2), 145-61. doi: 10.1007/s10508-005-9005-3. Epub 2006 Apr 26. PMID: 16752118.

  • Ganong, K. and Larson, E. (2012). Intimacy and Belonging: The Association between Sexual Activity and Depression among Older Adults. Society and Mental Health, 1(3), 153–172. https://doi.org/10.1177%2F2156869311431612.

  • Kashdan, T., Goodman, F., Stiksma, M., Milius, C., Mcknight, P. (2017) Sexuality Leads to Boosts in Mood and Meaning in Life With No Evidence for the Reverse Direction: A Daily Diary Investigation. Emotions, 18(4), 563-576. doi 10.1037/emo0000324

  • Stephenson K.R., Meston C.M. (2015). The conditional importance of sex: exploring the association between sexual well-being and life satisfaction. Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, 41(1),25-38. doi: 10.1080/0092623X.2013.811450. Epub 2013 Dec 5. PMID: 24308354.

  • Blumstein, P. and Schwartz, P. (1983). American Couples: Money, Work, Sex. Morrow, ISBN 10: 0688037720

  • Laumann, E.O, Gagnon, G.H., Michael, R.T., and Michaels, S. (1994). The Social Organization of Sexuality, ISBN: 9780226470207.

  • Peplau, L. A., Fingerhut, A., & Beals, K. P. (2004). Sexuality in the Relationships of Lesbians and Gay Men. In J. H. Harvey, A. Wenzel, & S. Sprecher (Eds.), The handbook of sexuality in close relationships (p. 349–369). Lawrence Erlbaum Associates Publishers.

  • Schoenfeld EA, Loving TJ, Pope MT, Huston TL, Štulhofer A. (2016) Does sex really matter? Examining the connections between spouses’ nonsexual behaviors, sexual frequency, sexual satisfaction, and marital satisfaction. Archives of Sexual Behavior. 46(2):489-501. doi: 10.1007/s10508-015-0672-4.

  • Beck, J. G., Bozman, A. W., & Qualtrough, T. (1991). The experience of sexual desire: Psychological correlates in a college sample. Journal of Sexual Research, 28, 443–456.

  • Jones, J. C., & Barlow, D. H. (1990). Self-reported frequency of sexual urges, fantasies, and masturbatory fantasies in heterosexual males and females. Archives of Sexual Behavior, 19, 269–279.

  • Basson, R. (2002) Are our definitions of women’s desire, arousal and sexual pain disorders too broad and our definitions of orgasmic disorder too narrow? Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, 28, 289-300.

  • Rothblum, E.D., Krueger, E.A., Kittle, K.R. et al. (2020). Asexual and Non-Asexual Respondents from a U.S. Population-Based Study of Sexual Minorities. Archives of  Sexual Behavior, 49, 757–767, https://doi.org/10.1007/s10508-019-01485-0

  • Bogaert, A.F. (2004). Asexuality: prevalence and associated factors in a national probability sample, Journal of Sex Research, 41(3):279-87, doi: 10.1080/00224490409552235

  • The Asexuality Visibility & Education Network (AVEN), https://www.asexuality.org/

  • Garde, K. and Lunde, I. (1980) Female sexual behaviour. A study in a random sample of 40-year-old women, Maturitas, 2 (3), 225-240, https://doi.org/10.1016/0378-5122(80)90007-9

  • Tatkin, S. (2013). Your Brain On Love: The Neurobiology of Healthy Relationships, Soundstrue Publishing.

  • Henderson-King, D.H. and Veroff, J. (1994). Sexual satisfaction and marital well-being in the first years of marriage. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 11, 509-534.

  • Kurdek, L.A. (1991). Sexuality in homosexual and heterosexual couples. In K. McKinney and S. Spreecher (Eds.), Sexuality in close relationships (pp.177-191). Hillsdale, NJ: Lawrence Erlbaum Associates.

  • Lawrence, K. And Byers, E. S. (1995). Sexual satisfaction in long-term heterosexual relationships: The interpersonal exchange model of sexual satisfaction. Personal Relationships, 2(2), 267-285.

update history

We regularly update the articles on ChoosingTherapy.com to ensure we continue to reflect scientific consensus on the topics we cover, to incorporate new research into our articles, and to better answer our audience’s questions. When our content undergoes a significant revision, we summarize the changes that were made and the date on which they occurred. We also record the authors and medical reviewers who contributed to previous versions of the article. Read more about our editorial policies here.

  • Originally Published: June 3, 2021
    Original Author: Krista Jordan, PhD
    Original Reviewer: Kristen Fuller, MD

  • Updated: October 5, 2022
    Author: No Change
    Reviewer: No Change
    Primary Changes: Updated for readability and clarity. Reviewed and added relevant resources.

Recent Articles

Does Sex Help With Anxiety
Does Sex Help With Anxiety?
Evidence exists that sex can help with anxiety by increasing endorphins and oxytocin in your brain, which have been...
';
Sexual Assault PTSD
Sexual Assault PTSD: Definition, Signs, & Treatment
Sexual assault post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) is a mental health disorder a person may develop after experiencing a sexual...
';
Is Sex Good for You 10 Healthy Benefits of Sex
Is Sex Good For You? 10 Healthy Benefits of Sex
It seems as though sex is everywhere. It’s used to sell just about anything, musicians sing about it, and...
';
Healing Sexual Trauma: 6 Tips From a Therapist
Healing Sexual Trauma: 6 Tips From a Therapist
Healing from sexual trauma can be a complex and challenging process. It may take time to recover, but there...
';
The 7 Stages of Emotional Affairs & How to Recover
The 7 Stages of Emotional Affairs & How to Recover
Emotional affairs can be different for everyone, but they typically follow seven stages of progression. An emotional affair usually...
';
50 Questions to Ask Your Partner to Increase Intimacy
50 Questions to Ask Your Partner to Increase Intimacy
We’re always looking for ways to connect with each other, especially in our romantic relationships. Maintaining emotional intimacy is...
';
Headshot of Krista Jordan, PhD
Written by:

Krista Jordan

PhD
Headshot of Dr. Kristen Fuller, MD
Reviewed by:

Kristen Fuller

MD
  • Does Sexual Satisfaction Lead to Relationship Satisfaction?Sex & Relationships
  • Benefits of Sex In a RelationshipBenefits
  • Ideal Frequency of Sex In a RelationshipFrequency
  • Causes of a Changing Sex DriveChanging Sex Drive
  • Tips to Approach the Topic of Sex With Your PartnerTalking About Sex
  • AsexualityAsexuality
  • Other Ways to Build Intimacy Outside of SexBuilding Intimacy
  • How to Find a TherapistTherapy
  • Final Thoughts On Sex In a RelationshipConclusion
  • Additional ResourcesResources
  • How Important Is Sex in a Relationship InfographicsInfographics
If you are in need of immediate medical help:
Medical
Emergency
911
Suicide Hotline
800-273-8255
See more Crisis Hotlines
  • About Us
  • Contact Us
  • Write for Us
  • Careers
  • Editorial Policy
  • Advertising Policy
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms of Service
  • No Surprises Act
For immediate help call:
Medical Emergency:
911
Suicide Hotline:
988
Click For More Crisis Hotlines
For immediate help call:
Medical Emergency:
911
Suicide Hotline:
811
See more Crisis Hotlines
here
logo
This site complies with the HONcode standard for trustworthy health information:
verify here.
This website is certified by Health On the Net Foundation. Click to verify.
Choosing Therapy Logo
We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However, you may visit Cookie Settings to provide controlled consent. Cookie settings ACCEPT
Privacy & Cookies Policy

Privacy Overview

We use cookies to facilitate website functionality. Also, we use third-party cookies to track your website behavior and target advertising. These cookies are stored in your browser only with your consent, and you have the choice of opting out.
Necessary
Always Enabled

Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. This category only includes cookies that ensures basic functionalities and security features of the website. These cookies do not store any personal information.

Non Necessary

Any cookies that may not be particularly necessary for the website to function and is used specifically to collect user personal data via analytics, ads, other embedded contents are termed as non-necessary cookies. It is mandatory to procure user consent prior to running these cookies on your website.

Save & Accept