Anger is a normal emotion, but when it crosses over into frequent outbursts, hurtful words at others, or being easily triggered, then cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) could be an effective form of treatment. CBT works to help you understand your triggers and replace them with coping strategies.
What Is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy?
Cognitive behavioral therapy is a solution-oriented form of psychotherapy that teaches you how to identify negative thoughts/feelings, do a reality-check, then challenge and replace them with more rational thoughts. It’s helpful for people with anxiety, depression, anger issues, stress, and addiction because it focuses on practical skills to help you feel better.
There are two main aspects to CBT:
- Functional analysis: look at thoughts and feelings about a behavior. Analysis focuses not only on the thoughts that lead to those behaviors, but also the triggers that lead to those thoughts.
- Skills training: focus on new coping skills that can be used in daily life.
A therapist who uses CBT will take an active role in your sessions, giving you direct advice and guidance. They will also assign homework, like keeping a daily mood log, which will help you become more in-tune with negative statements you make to yourself, understanding how those thoughts can influence your feelings and actions.
It’s important to keep in mind that changing negative thought patterns and behaviors takes time; the key is to be consistent when practicing the techniques.
How Does CBT for Anger Work?
CBT uses a range of questions and exercises to help you understand the triggers that cause anger to become intense and lead to outbursts. Once you can identify the triggers and their root causes, your therapist can show you techniques to manage anger more effectively, equipping you with strategies to disrupt and control your anger, such as deep breathing, relaxation techniques, and problem solving.
CBT techniques for anger also focus on replacing aggressive, unhealthy communication with calm, assertive communication. Remember, anger is a human emotion that should be expressed if there is a justifiable cause. The key is to learn adaptive ways of communicating anger without crossing appropriate boundaries.
CBT for Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
Because of the unpredictable nature of borderline personality disorder, CBT is effective in identifying thoughts and feelings that lead to anger or volatile/destructive behaviors. A therapist will work with you collaboratively during anywhere from 16-18 sessions to develop better skills to deal with emotions.
5 CBT Techniques for Anger
CBT techniques for anger include deep breathing and muscle relaxation, cognitive restructuring, problem-solving, behavioral rehearsal, and assertive communication.
Here are five CBT techniques for anger:
1. Deep Breathing & Muscle Relaxation
Excessive anger triggers increase heart rate and breathing. By breathing slowly through your nostrils into your belly and then exhaling slowly, you will feel relief and more in control. Set aside between 10-15 minutes to do this exercise.
Anger also manifests as muscle tension in your neck and shoulders. If your neck is stiff, continue breathing. Slowly and gently roll your head toward one shoulder and then the other. Coordinate your head role with your breathing. Carefully, repeat this several times until you feel tense muscles in your neck relax a little.
2. Cognitive Restructuring
The way you interpret a situation that triggers anger will directly impact the way you react to anger. Through cognitive restructuring, you learn to identify unhealthy thought patterns that fuel your anger and replace them with more rational, balanced thoughts.
One of the essential tools of CBT is a thought record, which will help you keep track of statements you make to yourself as well as anger triggers. A CBT therapist will assign you a homework task to monitor and record negative thoughts and triggers that you’re not always attuned to.
As you continue to use the thought record, you will gain a better understanding of what you are thinking and how these thoughts impact how you are reacting. Rather than reacting in anger, you’ll be able to challenge the thoughts and replace them with positive ones, or even just notice them and let them go.
3. Problem-solving
A CBT therapist will help you utilize strategic tools aimed at solving the problem. It’s essential to have a problem-solving goal rather than taking your angry feelings out on everyone around you. This looks like being flexible in how you think and reframing the angry thoughts into more helpful ones. It also considers costs and benefits of continuing to see the situation from an angry perspective.
4. Behavioral Rehearsal
A therapist can work with you to identify and reframe triggers and practice communicating anger. Through role rehearsal, a specific anger-provoking situation is described and then role-played by the client and therapist. The therapist gives honest, supportive feedback after each exercise to help the client improve their skills.
5. Assertive Communication
Often, people with excessive anger tend to suppress their feelings until the point that they are expressed in a volatile, inappropriate way. Assertive communication targets both verbal and nonverbal behavior. Verbal communication focuses on what is actually said and using “I” statements.
Nonverbal refers to the style of communication which includes: eye contact, posture, tone of voice, volume of speech, and reflective listening. A CBT therapist can help you practice assertiveness techniques.
Examples of CBT for Anger Management
Anger can be a helpful emotion for taking action if something in your life is not right. However, the way you manage your reactions and behaviors that stem from anger can be the difference between making positive change or constantly needing to deal with negative consequences of angry outbursts.
CBT for anger management can also be tailored to someone’s unique situation.
Here are examples of CBT for anger management:
CBT for Pent-Up Anger
Some people have pent-up anger due to a difficulty verbalizing their anger because it feels uncomfortable. Their tendency is to avoid confrontation and ignore feelings of frustration. This type of anger can end up being expressed in a passive-aggressive way or as an anger outburst.
CBT techniques would focus on identifying negative thoughts or triggers and communicating anger assertively. A CBT therapist might first ask you to write about your anger and reframe any cognitive distortions. Then you would practice communicating your anger to the person you are angry with; this could be done in session through role rehearsal.
CBT for Self-abusive Anger
This type of anger is shame-based and triggers feelings of helplessness, unworthiness, or negative self-talk. You might suppress these feelings (repressed anger) and express the anger through self-harm, substance abuse, or eating disorders. On the other hand, you might lash out at people in your life, which can lead to increased feelings of alienation.
CBT can assist in targeting negative, self-defeating thoughts/behaviors. By using cognitive reframing techniques, you can learn to challenge and replace distorted thoughts and feelings with rational, self-compassionate thoughts.
CBT for Volatile Anger
Volatile anger is when you feel easily triggered by big and small annoyances and impulsively express your anger. Unfortunately, this type of anger can be extremely destructive. People around you might feel they’re walking on eggshells, negatively impacting your ability to maintain long-term relationships. If left unchecked, volatile anger can lead to violent outbursts.
CBT can help you identify the triggers, signs, and physical indicators that precede a volatile outburst. It can also teach relaxation and de-escalation techniques like deep breathing or recording emotions in your CBT mood log.
Is CBT for Anger Effective?
Not only is CBT one of the cornerstones of treating anger management, but it’s also an empirically supported form of treatment that emphasizes identifying triggers and replacing them with more adaptive responses. CBT for anger management is also effective in improving your physical health, career, and relationships.1,2
Finding a Cognitive-Behavioral Therapist
To get the full benefits of CBT for anger management, it’s important to find a CBT therapist who you connect with and who is invested in helping you grow and make positive shifts in your life. If you’re new to psychotherapy, you could ask friends and family for referrals, search online, or search an online therapist directory to find a therapist specializing in CBT and anger issues.
How Much Does CBT Cost?
The cost of CBT therapy can vary, depending on where you live, but you can expect it to range between $100 to $200 per 50 minute session. Some health insurance companies cover therapy sessions, so it’s worth getting in touch to get more information regarding types of therapy that are covered, amount of deductible, etc. Many therapists also offer sliding-scale fees based on income, so it’s worth discussing with a few therapists to find a good fit.
Final Thoughts
Excessive anger can take a toll on your mental health, physical health, relationships, and career. If you feel overwhelmed by anger, don’t hesitate to reach out and get help. CBT for anger management is structured, directive and can teach you coping strategies to manage triggers in an adaptive way. Remember, anger should not be suppressed. Rather, it should be communicated in an assertive, healthy way.
