Self-discipline is a needed skill to be able to consistently apply new understandings, perspectives, and insights in life and relationships. It is the foundational underpinning of lasting growth and progress, and is often the distinguishing factor between short lived changes and lasting transformation. Here are several books that can help equip you with tools and understanding of self-discipline as you move through your healing journey.
General Books on Self Discipline
If you’re looking to up your self-discipline game, these books can help you understand how to make healthy changes in small but sustainable ways.
1. Neuro-Discipline: Everyday Neuroscience for Self-Discipline, Focus, and Defeating Your Brain’s Impulsive and Distracted Nature by Peter Hollins
This book is the third installment in Hollins’ book series, Live a Disciplined Life. It has been touted as a science-based approach to effectively getting things done without giving in to the lure of procrastination and laziness. Hollins focuses on the way our brains are wired at a primal level, and gives actionable steps to defeat these tendencies that aren’t serving us and start living a more disciplined life. With over 20 applications and action steps, this book promises to help you learn to beat your temptations, excuses, and weaknesses.
Neuro-Discipline will teach you:
- About the two brains, and the two versions of you that are always locked in battle
- How to trick your brain into action and productivity without working against it
- The role of dopamine and how you can simulate it for your own purposes
- How to talk to yourself and mold your environment to stay on track
- How to tackle excuses and dissect your emotional reactions
- How to create a calm mind for ruthless execution
2. 
Making a Change for Good: A Guide to Compassionate Self-Discipline by Cheri Huber
Huber’s revolutionary take on self-discipline comes from her belief that “no amount of self-punishment will ever make us happy or bring us control over life’s problems.” She boldly shifts the dialogue surrounding self-discipline to acknowledge that the help and direction we desperately seek is actually found in self-acceptance and treating ourselves with kindness.
Making a Change for Good argues the point that, when we are truly present in our lives, we are not engaged in distracting or self-sabotaging behaviors. Huber believes that if we simply grow and encourage our ability to pay attention and focus on what is here in this moment we will empower our experience to be more authentic, more honest, and yes—more disciplined. This book includes a guided thirty-day program of daily meditation, contemplation, and journaling to help you apply these behaviors in real time.
3. 5-Minute Self-Discipline Exercises: Stay Motivated, Cultivate Good Habits, and Achieve Your Goals by Christine Li, PhD
If you are someone who struggles to read books due to the time commitment involved, then this book of short exercises might be a good choice for you. Li understands that it is easy to get distracted by day-to-day life, especially when our to-do lists feel endless and our motivation is nowhere to be seen. That’s why she has broken down the process of building self-discipline into bite-sized exercises that only require five minutes of your attention at a time.
With over 104 varying exercises, including meditations, writing prompts, and affirmations, this book is a fully actionable tool to help you cultivate focus, demolish roadblocks, and practice self-compassion.
4. The Practicing Mind: Developing Focus and Discipline in Your Life, Master Any Skill or Challenge by Learning to Love the Process by Thomas M. Sterner
The Practicing Mind points out that when we want to acquire a new skill, or when we are faced with a formidable challenge we hope to overcome, oftentimes what we most need are patience, focus, and discipline. The unfortunate reality is that these traits are often elusive or difficult to maintain for many people.
In his studies of how human beings learn, which have been largely driven by his personal pursuit of disciplines like music and golf, Sterner has found that most of us have forgotten the “principles of practice.” He defines this as, “the process of picking a goal and applying steady effort to reach it.” The argument made in this book is that instead of getting hung up on a singular goal, and how quickly we can reach that destination, we must develop an appreciation for the journey and process of practicing in and of itself.
Books About Building Better Habits
Many people who struggle with self-discipline cite having problems breaking destructive habits and replacing them with healthier ones. If that sounds like you then you might find these books helpful.
5. Mindful Self-Discipline: Living with Purpose and Achieving Your Goals in a World of Distractions by Giovanni Dienstmann
Dienstmann gives a powerful reminder through his work: self-discipline is not about punishment or self-criticism, it is about self-respect. Many people try to begin their journey towards self-discipline by loading their shoulders with the burdens of shame and guilt for all the behaviors they deem as less-than-ideal. This revolutionary book encourages the reader to build self-discipline in a balanced way—without beating themselves up.
Mindful Self-Discipline contains: over 50 step-by-step exercises, 100 illustrations and diagrams, links to the scientific studies cited for each topic, and many examples — all to make it as easy as possible for the reader to actually apply this knowledge and transform their daily life. It is said to be a gentle, balanced, and achievable guide to living a life of purpose.
6.
Atomic Habits: The Step By Step Guide To Turn Your Goals Into Reality by James Clear
Atomic Habits has been hailed as a book that focuses on the fact that small, incremental, everyday routines compound into massive, positive change over time. The Four Laws of Behavior Change, are a simple set of rules we can use to build better habits.
The four laws are:
- Make it obvious
- Make it attractive
- Make it easy
- Make it satisfying
An atomic habit, as defined by Clear, is a regular practice or routine that is not only small and easy to do, but is also the source of incredible power. They are crucial components of the system of compound growth. This book breaks down the process of building life changing habits into bite-sized pieces that are accessible and easy to understand and apply.
7. Discipline Equals Freedom: Field Manual by Jocko Willink
A former Navy SEAL, Willink has filled this book with clear steps and priceless insight for conquering weakness, fear, and procrastination. Discipline Equals Freedom covers all the moving pieces to building discipline, including strategies and tactics for tackling all the obstacles that often stand between people and their ability to build lasting self control. It even includes specific physical training presented in full workouts for athletes all the way from beginner to expert, insight about the best sleep habits, and recommendations for food intake.
This book is a good choice for readers seeking a no-nonsense, highly structured approach to finding freedom through self-discipline.
Books on Self-Regulation & Self-Control
The skill of knowing how to self-regulate is an extraordinarily helpful one. The ability to build, grow, and maintain self-control in the face of temptation and hardship can be quite challenging. These books can help aid in the process.
8. The Mountain Is You: Transforming Self-Sabotage Into Self-Mastery by Brianna Wiest
Wiest starts this book by pointing out what paves the way to self-sabotage. She explains that coexisting but conflicting needs lead us to resist efforts to change until they feel completely pointless. The Mountain Is You argues that by gaining insight from our most damaging habits, fostering emotional intelligence by building a better understanding of our brains and bodies, and learning to act as the people we strive to become, we can finally get out of our own way and step fully into our potential.
Using the timeless and universal metaphor of a mountain, Wiest helps us see that in order to truly master our lives we must do the deep internal work of excavating trauma, building resilience, and adjusting how we show up for the climb. What we will find is that, in the end, it is not the mountain we will master, but ourselves.
9. Can’t Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odds by David Goggins
In this hybrid between a memoir and a self-growth book, Goggins states that most of us only tap into about 40% of our true capacity and capabilities. He calls this ‘The 40% Rule’, and his story helps lay out a path that anyone can walk to push past pain, demolish fear, and reach their full potential.
Goggins is a shining example of what drive and discipline can do for someone’s future. Growing up in a tumultuous and impoverished childhood, Goggins took himself from a child who felt stuck to an Armed Forces icon, and one of the world’s top endurance athletes. He is the only man in history to complete elite training as a Navy SEAL, Army Ranger, and Air Force Tactical Air Controller.
10. Real Help: An Honest Guide to Self-Improvement by Ayodeji Awosika
Ayodeji Awosika is a 3-time author, TEDx speaker, and top writer on medium.com who helps millions of readers per year with wisdom and insights to change their life. He wants you to know that his book doesn’t come with any “too good to be true” promises like “you will make millions of dollars” or “you will find perfect, peace, happiness, and contentment.” He is sick of the extra hype taglines in self-help books, and wants to empower you with tools to help strike the balance between realism and optimism while navigating the real world.
Real Help will help you discover the essence of your life’s purpose, develop mental toughness to survive in an unfair world, harness your passion, and build life changing habits. In Awosika’s own words, “This is a book that tells you what you need to know, not what you want to hear. This is a book that tells you how the world actually works, not how you think it should work.”
11. Feel the Fear… and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers
In this book, Jeffers takes a look at the underpinning of most people’s indecisiveness and the reason many people feel stuck when trying to build lasting change in their lives: fear. Using powerful insight coupled with lighthearted humor, Feel the Fear teaches you how to be assertive in the face of your fears, and enjoy the elation that comes from living a creative, loving, and immensely joyous life.
This down-to-earth guide breaks down what you are afraid of and why, how to shift your mindset from victim to creator, the secret of making “no lose decisions,” how to cultivate more meaning in your life, and provides a 10 step process to help you unsubscribe from negative self talk.
12. Let That Sh*t Go: Find Peace of Mind and Happiness in Your Everyday by Nina Purewal & Kate Petriw
Purewal helps us get to the bottom of why we just can’t seem to calm down. In a world of endless stressors from every growing to do lists, financial insecurity, deadlines that never seem to stop rolling in, and a constant serving of guilt for not feeling present enough in our relationships and interactions—most of us know we need a chance to catch our breath, but we barely have time to shower, much less meditate or go for a walk.
Let That Sh*t Go seeks to help you put your life in perspective, take each day one step at a time, and steal moments of calm amid the chaos. The authors want you to remember that it’s not worth holding onto things that are no longer serving you, and are only adding heaviness to your heart and soul.
How Talking to a Therapist Can Help
While books can be an incredible resource and supplement on your journey through healing, they are not a substitute for professional help. If you, or someone you know, is currently struggling with a lack of motivation that is limiting your ability to live your life fully, healthily, and happily, consider finding a therapist in your area by searching an online therapist directory.
Remember, lacking self-discipline is not a moral failure on your part. It is a skill that needs adequate direction and the right tools to be developed. Much like a muscle, it needs to be trained and built. Do not overwhelm yourself with guilt or self-loathing for feeling like you are not there yet. You will be—one day at a time. You can do this!
