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Malignant Narcissist: Traits, Signs, Causes, & How to Deal With One

Published: July 16, 2021 Updated: March 14, 2023
Published: 07/16/2021 Updated: 03/14/2023
Headshot of Hailey Shafir, LPCS, LCAS, CCS
Written by:

Hailey Shafir

LPCS, LCAS, CCS
Headshot of Benjamin Troy, MD
Reviewed by:

Benjamin Troy

MD
  • What Is a Malignant Narcissist?What Is Malignant Narcissism?
  • Traits of Malignant NarcissismCommon Traits
  • Signs of a Malignant NarcissistCommon Signs
  • What Causes Malignant Narcissism?Possible Causes
  • How to Deal With a Malignant NarcissistDealing With a Narcissist
  • Can Malignant Narcissism Be Treated?Does Treatment Help?
  • Additional ResourcesResources
  • Malignant Narcissist InfographicInfographics
Headshot of Hailey Shafir, LPCS, LCAS, CCS
Written by:

Hailey Shafir

LPCS, LCAS, CCS
Headshot of Benjamin Troy, MD
Reviewed by:

Benjamin Troy

MD

A malignant narcissist will display traits such as arrogance, a need for recognition, and tendencies to use or exploit others for selfish reasons.1,2,3 Malignant narcissism is used to describe those with symptoms of both narcissistic personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder. Combined, these conditions can interfere with one’s relationships and is considered largely untreatable.2,3,4

Have you been hurt by a narcissist? Therapy can be a place of healing. BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $60 per week. Complete a brief questionnaire and get matched with the right therapist for you.

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What Is a Malignant Narcissist?

Malignant narcissism is not a formal diagnosis, but instead a common term used to describe a person with traits and symptoms of both narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). Also called pathological narcissists, malignant narcissists tend to experience more impairments in their relationships and responses to treatment than those with classic NPD.2,4

People with NPD tend to exhibit grandiose attitudes, feel superior to others, need excessive praise, and react very poorly to even the slightest criticism. Those with ASPD lack empathy, disregard the feelings and needs of others, and use or exploit others to meet their needs.5 Malignant narcissists tend to display a mix of these traits and behaviors, which keep them from forming healthy relationships.2,3,6

Malignant Narcissists Vs. Psychopaths Vs. Sociopaths

Psychopaths and sociopaths are individuals with ASPD who do not display symptoms of NPD (sociopaths and narcissists are quite different).1 While both psychopaths and sociopaths display traits of ASPD, malignant narcissists (also called narcissistic sociopaths) exhibit both narcissistic and antisocial traits.

According to some researchers, there is also a slight difference between a sociopath and psychopath. Many argue psychopaths have a more severe form of antisocial personality disorder than sociopaths. The belief is that sociopaths do appear to have some sense of morality and an ability to empathize, making them less likely to commit harmful or illegal acts. Psychopaths, on the other hand, are not believed to have these capabilities, meaning they have less restraint against acting aggressively and recklessly.7

Traits of Malignant Narcissism

Malignant narcissists display traits and symptoms of antisocial and narcissistic personality disorder. When combined, these traits tend to lead to a very severe form of pathology. While both ASPD and NPD are both types of personality disorders, how they affect a person varies greatly.1,5

Common traits of a malignant narcissist include:3,6

  • Being extremely arrogant and self-centered
  • Disregarding the feelings and needs of other people
  • Manipulating, using, or exploiting others for personal gain or pleasure
  • Having an extreme need for power
  • Acts of revenge against those who criticize them
  • Fantasizing about ways to obtain more power or dominance over others
  • Lacking conscience, regret, or remorse for their actions
  • Being cruel and taking pleasure in the pain of others
  • High levels of aggression towards other people
  • Paranoia or mistrust of others

Are you dating or married to a narcissist?

Whether you’re trying to move on or rebuild a relationship, a licensed therapist can guide you. BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. Visit BetterHelp

Is your mother, father, or family member a narcissist?

Being raised by a narcissist can damage your confidence and self-esteem. A therapist from Online-Therapy can help you both heal from the past, and manage the relationship to be less harmful.  Counseling starts at $50 per week. Try Online-Therapy

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by BetterHelp and Online-Therapy.

10 Signs of a Malignant Narcissist

Malignant narcissists often experience severe dysfunctions in their personal relationships, work, and ability to function in other areas of life.3,6 Their reckless behavior, disregard for others, and inability to form healthy relationships can make them easier to spot than people with fewer traits or more mild or ‘covert’ forms of narcissism.

Below are common signs of a malignant narcissist:

1. They Use, Abuse, & Discard People

One of the main signs of a malignant narcissist is their long history of using, abusing, and discarding people who are no longer useful to them. Those closest to them will often see a pattern of broken relationships and friendships, as well as family members and significant others who have become useless or irrelevant to them. A malignant narcissist may very quickly drop someone after they’ve used this person to fulfill their narcissistic supply.

2. They Are Obsessed With Power

Malignant narcissists are often hungry for power and obsessed with ways to get more of it. They often vie for jobs that afford them this power or form relationships with people who are vulnerable to their control. Because they lack the ability to find worth within themselves, they have an extreme need for positions of superiority to make them feel successful.

3. Everything Is Personal for Them

To a malignant narcissist, everything is personal. If a person makes a joke about them, forgets to call them back, or if they are passed over for a promotion at work, they will be deeply offended and angry, triggering a narcissistic collapse. In the narcissist’s world, there is no such thing as an  explanation for why someone does not treat them in the way they expect (and in their mind, deserve) to be treated.

4. They Hold Grudges & Take Revenge

A malignant narcissist is easily offended and when they are, their revenge can be brutal. People with this personality disorder tend to hold long grudges against anyone who has wronged or slighted them in any way. Even disagreeing with them, providing feedback, or questioning something said can result in swift, anger-filled revenge. A malignant narcissist may punish others by lashing out, ignoring them, or even cutting them off altogether.

5. They Take Pleasure From the Suffering of Others

Malignant narcissists can be cruel and even sadistic, seeming to take a sick pleasure or satisfaction in the suffering of others. They may laugh or mock, intentionally humiliate, or use personal knowledge against someone. Unfortunately, this also means that they can be predators who will manipulate, abuse, and exploit people, either for personal gain or just for fun.

6. Nothing Is Ever Their Fault

Narcissists (and especially malignant narcissists) usually do not take the blame for any of their words or actions, even when they’re clearly in the wrong. Instead, they tend to lash out, get defensive, and find ways to blame other people, even when they have to bend and distort the truth to do so.

7. They Are Ruthless in Their Pursuit of What They Want

Malignant narcissists will often be ruthless in their pursuit of power, wealth, success, or recognition. When they want something, there may not be any line they’re unwilling to cross to get it, even at the direct expense of others who they say they care about. They may lie, manipulate, use, or even discredit people in order to get what they want.

8. They Don’t Have a Conscience

A lack of empathy or regard for the feelings of others is a symptom of both APD and NPD, and is common in malignant narcissists. People with this personality type will often have no remorse or regret for things they’ve done that have caused harm. Sometimes, it may be necessary to fake remorse in order to get what they want. However, typically they will admit no wrongdoing at all and genuinely don’t feel bad for their behavior.

9. They Have Many Enemies

It should come as no surprise that a malignant narcissist will have a long list of enemies, usually one that includes former friends, lovers, and members of their own family. They tend to make enemies easily as even the slightest offense can cause them to discard anyone. Because relationships are only a means to an end for them, it’s fairly easy for a malignant narcissist to break off a tie, even with those close to them.

10. No One Will See Their Insecurities

Deep down, narcissists are extremely insecure. However, a malignant narcissist will never let these insecurities show to others. Instead, they will become defensive, lash out, shut down, or even destroy relationships when they feel threatened. They will often mask their low self-esteem behind a façade of arrogance or grandiosity.

Have you been hurt by a narcissist? Therapy can be a place of healing. BetterHelp has over 20,000 licensed therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy. BetterHelp starts at $60 per week. Complete a brief questionnaire and get matched with the right therapist for you.

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by BetterHelp

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What Causes Malignant Narcissism?

All mental health disorders, including malignant narcissism, are believed to be caused by a mix of genetic, environmental, and personality factors.1,2 Some research suggests that there may be differences in the wiring and structure of the brain in people with NPD, which can help explain certain symptoms and traits associated.3

Possible causes of malignant narcissism include:1,2,3

  • Experiencing abuse or neglect
  • Being held to unrealistically high expectations as a child
  • Being excessively praised or criticized as a child (or both)
  • Possessing irritable, neurotic, or aggressive personality traits
  • Having a low stress or frustration tolerance
  • Being overly sensitive and unable to regulate emotions
  • Being bullied or rejected in childhood
  • Being told one is special or has extraordinary talents
  • Witnessing entitled, grandiose, or narcissistic traits in a caregiver
  • Seeking external validation or praise to compensate for low self-esteem
  • Learning that vulnerability is a sign of weakness
  • Learning that failure and mistakes are intolerable or unacceptable
  • Excessive focus on status, recognition, power, and success
  • Lack of self-awareness and trouble recognizing emotions in self and others
  • Disrupted identity development

How to Deal With a Malignant Narcissist

Unfortunately, the traits and symptoms of malignant narcissism directly impact other people, especially those closest to the person. When dealing with a narcissist, many people become victims of narcissistic abuse. This behavior commonly involves narcissistic manipulation, deceit, and narcissistic gaslighting.

The consequences of this kind of ongoing abuse can be devastating, and negatively impact a person’s quality of life, self-esteem, and overall mental health. It may become necessary to distance yourself from a malignant narcissist, especially if they’ve become abusive or toxic – if you’re in a relationship, it’s probably time to break up with the narcissist.

Below are some ways to deal with a malignant narcissist:8

  • Manage your expectations: Don’t expect love, fairness, or loyalty from them. Malignant narcissists are incapable of true, reciprocal, healthy relationships.
  • Limit your interactions: Keep interactions brief, focused, and superficial. This minimizes your risk of being harmed or exploited by them
  • Avoid being too vulnerable: Do not be vulnerable or open with them: They may use this personal information as ammunition later on.
  • Let them talk about themselves: Be supportive when a malignant narcissist talks about themselves. Feeding their need for validation can keep them from using aggressive tactics.
  • Identify the tactics they use against you: This helps you clearly identify when they are manipulating you.
  • Understand what they want from you: Recognizing what they want from you can help you decide ahead of time if you will say yes. This helps maintain your boundaries with them, even when they try to overstep.
  • Understand and avoid their triggers/insecurities: Causing a narcissistic injury can make you their target.
  • Practice self-care and use your support system: This protects against the negative psychological effects of narcissistic abuse

Can Malignant Narcissism Be Treated?

Malignant narcissists rarely seek treatment and even when they do, their defenses often make them resistant to any change.2,3,4 Honest self-reflection that comes with therapy involves introspection that can uncover flaws, mistakes, and insecurities that malignant narcissists are unable to deal with. Still, there are some exceptions. Those who do seek help for this problem have some degree of self-awareness and a willingness to change, which can both make treatment more effective. The best step to seeking help for NPD is to find the right therapist who is knowledgeable and experienced in helping people with this personality disorder.

Additional Resources

Education is just the first step on our path to improved mental health and emotional wellness. To help our readers take the next step in their journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy may be compensated for marketing by the companies mentioned below.

Online Therapy

BetterHelp – Get support and guidance from a licensed therapist. BetterHelp has over 20,000 therapists who provide convenient and affordable online therapy.  Complete a brief questionnaire and get matched with the right therapist for you. Get Started

Online-Therapy – Online-Therapy.com provides a weekly live video session, unlimited text messaging, and self-guided activities like journaling. Starting at $64 per week, this is one of the most affordable options for CBT therapy. Try Online-Therapy

Support Groups

PeerVida – PeerVida offers weekly support groups for those who have been a victim of narcissistic abuse from a relative or partner. Groups are small and facilitated by a mental health professional. The cost of attending a group is $35 with no future commitment. Try PeerVida

Narcissism Newsletter

A free newsletter from Choosing Therapy for those recovering from narcissistic abuse. Get helpful tips and the latest information. Sign Up

Choosing Therapy Directory 

You can search for therapists by specialty, experience, insurance, or price, and location. Find a therapist today.

Choosing Therapy partners with leading mental health companies and is compensated for marketing by BetterHelp, PeerVida, and Online-Therapy.com.

For Further Reading

  • Best Books on Narcissism
  • National Domestic Violence Hotline
  • Brief Pathological Narcissism Inventory
  • MentalHealth.gov

Malignant Narcissist Infographic

Malignant Narcissist Definition   Signs of Malignant Narcissism    Possible Causes of Narcissism

Dealing with a Malignant Narcissist

8 sources

Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.

  • Fisher, K.A., & Hany, M. (2020). Antisocial Personality Disorder. StatPearls Publishing. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK546673/.

  • Mitra. P, & Fluyau. D. (2021). Narcissistic Personality Disorder. StatPearls StatPearls. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK556001/

  • George, F. R., & Short, D. (2018). The cognitive neuroscience of narcissism. Journal of Brain, Behavior and Cognitive Sciences, 1, ID-6.

  • Caligor, E., Levy, K. N., & Yeomans, F. E. (2015). Narcissistic personality disorder: Diagnostic and clinical challenges. American Journal of Psychiatry, 172(5), 415-422.

  • American Psychiatric Association. (2013). Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed.). https://doi.org/10.1176/appi.books.9780890425596

  • Dashineau, S. C., et al. (2019). Pathological narcissism and psychosocial functioning. Personality disorders, 10(5), 473–478. https://doi.org/10.1037/per0000347

  • Pemment, J. (2013). Psychopathy versus sociopathy: Why the Distinction has become crucial. Aggression and Violent Behavior, 18(5), 458-461.

  • Jackson, T. (2017). How to Handle a Narcissist: Understanding and Dealing with a Range of Narcissistic Personalities. Narcissism Books.

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Headshot of Hailey Shafir, LPCS, LCAS, CCS
Written by:

Hailey Shafir

LPCS, LCAS, CCS
Headshot of Benjamin Troy, MD
Reviewed by:

Benjamin Troy

MD
  • What Is a Malignant Narcissist?What Is Malignant Narcissism?
  • Traits of Malignant NarcissismCommon Traits
  • Signs of a Malignant NarcissistCommon Signs
  • What Causes Malignant Narcissism?Possible Causes
  • How to Deal With a Malignant NarcissistDealing With a Narcissist
  • Can Malignant Narcissism Be Treated?Does Treatment Help?
  • Additional ResourcesResources
  • Malignant Narcissist InfographicInfographics
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