Social anxiety in teens may be displayed as fears of engaging with peers, intense shyness, a lack of personal hygiene, and social disengagement. It is important to address these behaviors in a child, as untreated symptoms can greatly impact their overall well-being and growth. Seeking treatment for and modeling healthy coping skills to your teen can help them feel more confident in themselves and experience symptom relief.
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What Is Social Anxiety in Teens?
Social anxiety disorder is common in teens and many find this condition difficult to navigate. Anxiety in teens negatively impacts their relationships, both platonic and romantic. However, it is important to distinguish the difference between social anxiety and shyness. An individual with social anxiety will experience extreme fear and nervousness regarding social interaction, which greatly impairs their ability to function in certain settings. Signs of social anxiety may develop early on, so caregivers should be mindful of any behavioral changes or patterns in their teen.1
Common symptoms of social anxiety in teens include:
- Unhealthy self-consciousness in social situations
- Avoidance behaviors
- Decline in grades and academic performance
- Decrease in care for personal hygiene
- Lack of friendships
- Self-criticism
What Causes Social Anxiety Disorder in Teens?
In order to address symptoms of social anxiety, understanding the cause(s) behind your teen’s condition is important. Many factors might contribute to their disorder including their genetics, environment, and peer-pressure.
Social Anxiety in teens may be caused by:
Parenting Styles
There are a variety of parenting styles and some may have a negative influence on a teen’s social development. Parenting is never easy, and sometimes parents may not make the best choices when it comes to handling their child’s behavior. For example, caregivers who utilize an authoritarian parenting style may unintentionally influence their teen’s self-esteem in negative ways, as their child is unable to live up to their expectations or demands. Frequent criticism can make a child shrink their presence around people. Conversely, helicopter parents often experience severe parental anxiety themselves regarding their child’s well-being, which can in turn impact how their teen views and interacts with others.
Genetics
Social anxiety may be caused by genetic predispositions. A teen may be more likely to display symptoms of anxiety or social anxiety if they have a parent with the same diagnosis. However, it is important to note that while heredity can play a role in the development of an anxiety disorder, a teen’s environment and upbringing greatly influence this as well.
Peer Pressure
Many teens may struggle with peer pressure and act in certain ways in order to be accepted by their friend groups. Some may feel overwhelmed by the choices they need to make to seem “cool” or well-adjusted in their social group. Living up to the expectations of peers can leave a teen feeling incredibly anxious, possibly resulting in self-isolation or avoidance of social interaction.
Bullying
Bullying can occur for any number of reasons, such as being different from others or not giving in to peer pressure. Some teens may experience cyberbullying online and or through social media. When a teen is bullied, they may experience a severely negative self-image and self-esteem. This can make them less willing to interact with others, even close friends and family.
How Social Anxiety Affects Teens
Social anxiety can impact a teen’s life in many ways. A teen may let their self-care lapse, feel increasingly lonely, or lack communication with family members. Unfortunately, this can result in missed opportunities for growing friendships or academic growth as the teen socially withdraws. If left untreated, these challenges can carry on into adulthood.2
Impacts of social anxiety in teens may include:
- Loneliness: Teens with a social anxiety disorder often struggle with loneliness as their fear of interacting with peers leads them to exclude themselves from social settings.
- Low self-esteem: A teen may have low self-esteem if they are afraid of being judged or disliked by others.
- Academic issues: A decline in grades and academic performance may occur as a teen becomes overwhelmed by their anxiety at school.
- Neglected health: A teen with social anxiety may be less likely to share their health concerns with their caregivers or doctor. This can be due to a fear of speaking up and calling attention to themselves.
- Onset of depression: Because of increased loneliness and isolation, a teen might further retreat into themselves and struggle with feelings of worthlessness. Over time, this can develop into a depressive disorder.
- Bullying: Bullying may occur as a result of a teen’s social anxiety and thus worsen a teen’s condition. A teen may be singled out because of their demeanor and social awkwardness.
- Increased familial conflict: If a parent or caregiver is not understanding of their teen’s behavior, they may push their teen to engage in social activities or extracurricular activities that the teen doesn’t want to participate in. A teen with social anxiety will be greatly against this, which can result in increased arguments and conflict within the household.
How Is Social Anxiety in Teens Diagnosed?
A diagnostic examination for social anxiety can be performed by a psychiatrist or therapist. This will often include assessments of a teen’s symptoms to determine how severely these impact the teen’s social well-being. After a diagnosis is provided, a doctor or mental health professional will work with both the caregiver and teen to determine the best treatment plan.
7 Tips for Helping Teens With Anxiety
If a parent is wondering how to help with social anxiety, they can begin by teaching their teenager healthy coping skills for anxiety and making efforts to both empower and encourage their child. Finding methods that work best for your teen is important, as you don’t want to isolate them even further. It is essential to remain supportive, kind, and patient throughout their treatment process.
Below are seven tips for helping a teen with social anxiety:
1. Teach Healthy Coping Skills
A teen who understands how to handle anxiety as it occurs is more likely to feel confident in themselves and in social settings. Parents should encourage their teen to adopt healthy coping mechanisms by modeling these behaviors themselves and educating their teen on their importance. Start by teaching them how to self-soothe, practice grounding techniques, or engage in breathwork during periods of high stress and discomfort.
2. Build Their Self-Esteem
Focusing on building your child’s self-esteem is essential when helping them deal with social anxiety. A teen who is praised and supported by their parents will feel more empowered in themselves and their ability to interact with others. For example, accept your teen for who they are, even if they are different from how you were growing up–whether it be academically, creatively, socially, or likewise. Additionally, parents can elicit the help of family members and loved ones throughout this process. Encourage important adults in your teen’s life to play a role in the development of your teen’s self-image, too.
3. Encourage Social Outings
While a teen might be resistant to social outings, exposing a teen to opportunities offers them places to grow and learn from others. Of course, they may not agree to your suggestions, but it can get their mental gears turning and generate interest in certain activities. For instance, offer to volunteer with your teen, host a gathering at home with both immediate and extended family, or drive them to a local YMCA for a local youth program.
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4. Model Positive Self-Talk
When a teen struggles with negative self-talk, parents should be sure to model positive self-image and self-appreciation. For example, make time every day to provide yourself with loving affirmations or bring praise to an accomplishment. This suggests to your child that if you are worthy of praise and positivity, then so are they.
5. Encourage Creative Outlets
Teens are constantly learning more about themselves as they develop. They may recognize that their interests are changing and they start to take a liking to certain creative activities. If this is the case, pay attention to what your teen is interested in. Encourage them to continue fostering these skills and offer them opportunities to express their creativity. For example, if they enjoy drawing, you may try finding a local class that offers art courses. If your teen agrees to attend, this can put them in contact with peers their own age and grow their social skills.
6. Buy Them a Journal
But your teen a journal and encourage them to use it whenever they feel anxious or overwhelmed by negative thoughts. Releasing anxiety in a tangible way can help rid a teen of the mental fog that may be making it difficult for them to interact with others. Additionally, journaling can help your child label their feelings and feel more in control of them.
7. Encourage Physical Activity
Exercise releases endorphins and can be beneficial for a number of reasons. Staying active can be as simple as going for a walk or lifting weights at home. If your teen expresses interest in a certain sport, offer to help them find a local team or group that they can join. You can also consider seeking private coaching if your teen feels uncomfortable about joining a team just yet. Not only can being a part of a team build your teen’s self-esteem, it can also encourage them to engage with team members and peers.
When to Seek Professional Help
While your teen’s social anxiety may not be “cured,” their symptoms can be managed with proper treatment. Parental or caregiver involvement is incredibly important, as early action may help prevent current symptoms from worsening or new symptoms from emerging. Treatment for social anxiety disorder will offer your teen the ability to cope with and manage their condition. If you’re wondering whether or not your teen needs therapy, it is never a bad idea to look into the benefits of professional guidance.3
Therapy
Therapy is a very important element of treatment as it provides teens a safe, judgment-free space to explore their feelings, triggers, and emotions. Parents or caregivers should encourage their teen to engage honestly with their therapist and stay active throughout the process. They can make efforts on their own to find the right therapist for their child. However, it is also important that your teen feel they have a say in this choice and that they are comfortable with their therapist.
Therapy options for teens with social anxiety include:
- Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): CBT for teens can be especially beneficial when treating social anxiety. A therapist will teach a teen how their thoughts impact their behaviors and make conscious efforts to change these.
- Family therapy: When parents or caregivers engage with their teen in family therapy, a teen can feel empowered knowing that they are supported by and cared for by their loved ones.
- Mindfulness-based cognitive therapy (MBCT): MBCT encourages clients to practice mindfulness techniques during times of anxiety. These allow a teen to remain present and grounded in a given moment, rather than focused on past or future factors.
- Group therapy: While a teen with social anxiety will often be fearful of group activities, being a part of a community of similar peers can help them feel less alone in their struggles.
Medication
In some cases, parents and their teen may consider seeking medications for anxiety to help manage symptoms throughout treatment. On their own or in conjunction with therapy, medications can help a teen feel more in control of their condition and more willing to engage with others as they experience symptom relief. Your child’s doctor can work with you to determine if this would be a helpful addition to your teen’s treatment plan.
In My Experience
Choosing Therapy strives to provide our readers with mental health content that is accurate and actionable. We have high standards for what can be cited within our articles. Acceptable sources include government agencies, universities and colleges, scholarly journals, industry and professional associations, and other high-integrity sources of mental health journalism. Learn more by reviewing our full editorial policy.
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Josephs. (2017). Helping Your Anxious Teen: Positive Parenting Strategies to Help Your Teen Beat Anxiety, Stress, and Worry. New Harbinger Publications.
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A Simple Approach to Relieve Teens’ Anxiety and Depression. (2021). JAMA, 326(7), 591. https://doi.org/10.1001/jama.2021.13201
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Bernstein. (2020). Anxiety, depression and anger toolbox for teens : 50 powerful mindfulness, CBT and positive psychology activities to manage your emotions. PESI Publishing & Media.
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Additional Resources
To help our readers take the next step in their mental health journey, Choosing Therapy has partnered with leaders in mental health and wellness. Choosing Therapy is compensated for marketing by the companies included below.
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For Further Reading
- The 21 Best Parenting Books
- Does My Teen Need Counseling? 15 Signs to Know
- How to Tell If Your Teen Is Benefiting From Therapy
- Supporting Your Teen After Their Therapy Session
- How Do I Tell My Parents I Need Therapy?
- National Social Anxiety Center – National Social Anxiety Center
- Social Anxiety Institute
- NIMH » Home (nih.gov)
- What Is Second-hand Embarrassment?
- Exposure Therapy for Social Anxiety
- Introvert Vs. Social Anxiety
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